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I wish i could go back in time and do everything different, but i can't and the people i've wronged don't seem willing to let it go. Because of this, i keep feeling guilty and i know God forgives me, but i can't seem to forgive myself, any advice?

2007-10-28 11:30:11 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture Religion & Spirituality

18 answers

Have you asked them to forgive you. It can be hard to say you are sorry but even harder to ask them to forgive you. Once that is done truly repent to God (I amnot saying you haven't already done this but do it again if you need to and again.) Ask God to take the burden from you. Then start living your life. You may continue to feel guilt and those people may have said they forgive you but haven't. It is sometimes hard for them to let it go until they see that you truly hve moved past that behaviour. Don't necassarily try to make it up to them but just show them and all those around you that you are making changes in your behaviour. Eventually you will be able to move past it.

Psalm 103:12
As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.

2007-10-28 11:44:49 · answer #1 · answered by linnea13 5 · 0 0

Forgiveness, even forgiving ourselves, is a process. Just as you don't just magically forgive someone who's wronged you, you won't just magically forgive yourself either. Yes, we should understand that guilt is a tool the devil loves to use against us, because it is; but also know that God doesn't want you to continue to feel guilt or shame, because these are all means of separating us from God's love. Be gentle with yourself, and work on the future instead of continuing to look back in the past. The past is gone, and can never be undone, all you can do now is try to make amends. If you'v done that, then you really need to move on. Try talking with your pastor or a counselor to find out why you're dwelling on the past so much, and to get specific help in getting past this road block. Above all else, remember that God loves you, so much more then you could ever love yourself, and I love you too! I'll be praying for you.

2007-10-28 18:39:40 · answer #2 · answered by bainaashanti 6 · 1 0

First of all hun, the people that you have wronged should accept your apology and LET IT GO. That part is on them hun, not you. Once you ask GOD to forgive you, it is done, it is over, it is finished. The hardest thing to do however, is to forgive yourself. I know, I have been there. Quick story, my Father passed away late afternoon. He laid down to take a nap and he never woke up, he passed away in his sleep. I was his Healthcare Giver for 4 years. That night after mortuary came and removed his body from the house I went out in the back yard and cried and cried. I felt as if I missed something somewhere. I was going thru the "routine" of the day over in my mind and trying to find a "glitch" somewhere. I did not sleep that night. I kept asking GOD to forgive me if I missed something. I KNEW in my HEART HE would forgive me but I had to work hard to forgive myself. What you are doing is "beating yourself up" for your prior actions. My suggestion would be to not go around the people you have wronged, find a meeting or two to go too to talk this thru with someone and in time hun, you will be able to LET THIS GO. You are growing in the LORD, accept it and roll with the punches :) I hope I have helped, Blessings

2007-10-28 18:53:58 · answer #3 · answered by DERLANDSON 4 · 0 0

"'Father forgive them they know not what they do"


If God can forgive us who are we not to forgive our selves.
we can not change the past but the future can be any thing we want it to be. Until you forgive your self you will not be able to forgive any one else either. Maybe you have got forgiving
your self mixed up with pity for your self, as these people you speak of evidently have not forgiven you. If these people are
family? who you have "wronged" in the same manner time
after time for a lenghty time, such as problem drinking? Then it will take time to prove to them that you have changed and
will continue to change, and in time they will trust you, The
ball is really in your court to prove your self by actions not
words, of which they may have heard too many times before.
you must have patience rebuilding a relationship takes a long
time if it is rebuilt at all. Whatever the case may be, if you have made your amends, if at this point they have not accepted them you must just go on with life and show them you mean to change and do it not for them for your self. good luck and Blessings

2007-10-28 19:33:39 · answer #4 · answered by jenny 7 · 0 0

I have the sort of the same problem at times, but others are always happy to forgive me. I am the one who has a hard time forgiving myself.

What I was told (and it helped me) was that when you don't forgive yourself and keep asking God over and over for forgiveness, it is as if you are doubting Him.

2007-10-28 18:42:39 · answer #5 · answered by batgirl2good 7 · 0 0

take a few lines from AA:

"God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things that should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other."

you cannot change the past... you can walk a different path now

you cannot make someone else forgive... you can only ask for forgiveness, and change your behavior toward them

if you have honestly make changes in your life and tried to make amends for the past... then move on; you cannot change what was...

if someone else chooses to hold on, and be held captive by the past... it isn't your fault.

but do know, that sometimes your actions do leave damage that cannot be easily repaired... that is just the way life is, sadly. be the best you that you can be, and leave the past. time does heal... that and kindness...

2007-10-28 18:59:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

God has forgiven you. He is the one that matters. If God is able to forgive you for your sins are you better them he that you can not? Forgiving yourself is the hardest part so it is better not to even try. Just thank God that he does forgive you. Try your best not to mess up again. We all do though 'cause we are only human.

2007-10-28 18:46:44 · answer #7 · answered by Ava 5 · 0 0

I've been in this situation before, and honestly, all you can do, from a Christian perspective, is apologize to those you've somehow wronged. If they accept the apology that's icing on the cake. If they don't, then you've done what you're supposed to do. Besides, haven't you already been forgiven by the only one that matters? Of course! Don't let past human error take away your joy in Christ....no one should hold that kind of power over you.
Take care...

2007-10-28 18:39:29 · answer #8 · answered by songlismom 3 · 1 0

I have almost the same problem, only the people have forgiven me but I can't forgive myself. So to be honest with you even though they eventually will forgive you, you will never forgive yourself no matter how hard you try. Regret is a powerful thing. Sorry I don't mean to be a barer of bad news but I don't want to bulls%^t you.

2007-10-28 18:37:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

This is something that you need to take to the Lord. He forgives you. You only have to apologize once. And explain yourself once to each person. If they dont accept it, it is their problem. Pray for them. If they are Christians, then they need to pray. Also, if they are Christians, shame on them.

This is where the devil likes to keep the guilt candle lite. He knows that its hard to grow and move along with your life by reminding you of the past. If you sense he is doing this, remind him of his future. Is you guilt greater that God's forgiveness.

2007-10-28 18:44:28 · answer #10 · answered by guitarrman45 7 · 0 0

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