except for "the bible says so"
2007-10-28 05:21:26 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I just wrote a booklet called "Why Wait - Sex and Your Choices" aimed at showing teenagers why it makes good sense to wait until marriage before having sex. I did not refer to God or religon AT ALL in the booklet. Happy to email you a copy if you like.
A summary of arguments goes thus:
• Self-respect. People who expect others to leap into bed with them after only a couple of dates treat them like prostitutes. Those who respect themselves recognise that they will want to save the most intimate part of themselves for someone they completely trust, and someone who is committed to them.
• Staying safe. Not having sex guarantees you will not get any venereal disease including HIV, cervical cancer, or have an unwanted pregnancy.
• Self control. Learning to control the sex drive and powerful desires help build strength in other areas of life too, and also builds self confidence.
• Making it special. You only get one virginity, and can't get it back once you've given it away. If you wait until marriage then you are giving your spouse a priceless wedding gift.
• Strengthening marriage. If you have both waited until marriage, then the committment of marriage brings with it a new freedom and the fun of learning about each other and learning how to enjoy sex together. There will be no comparisons with others, or unreasonable expectations. It will be something private between just the two of you with no "skeletons" in the closet or jealousies. Those who have had sex with others or their partner and then get married see marriage as a new restriction, instead of the wonderful bond it is supposed to be.
I think it is fairly self-evident that sex is to be saved for marriage. I waited until I was married, and although I'll admit that did bring its own problems, I know it was the right thing to do.
2007-10-28 05:36:30 · answer #1 · answered by sunnyannie 5 · 5⤊ 1⤋
You asked for just one...I'll give you my top eight...
1. You are risking the chance of various sexually transmitted diseases...some that have no cure and some that are even fatal.
2. You are risking the chance of an unplanned pregnancy. The only 100% fool-proof form of birth control is abstinence...all other forms carry some risk of pregnancy.
3. You are risking a broken heart and other emotional and psychological problems when the relationship ends.
4. You are risking deception by another person that isn't honest about what he or she really wanted from you...and this can cause damage to your self-esteem and your ability to trust in the future.
5. You are devaluing yourself by giving another person your body without demanding that they value you in return.
6. It makes it more difficult to control yourself in the future once you know the pleasures of sex.
7. You are giving a part of yourself to another person that you can't get back in the future...this leaves you with less to give to someone that deserves all of you in the future.
8. It creates baggage that you will carry in to every future relationship.
Some of these are related, but I see them as different consequences of the decision to go against God's instructions for the proper use of sex.
2007-10-28 05:51:46 · answer #2 · answered by KAL 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since this question popped up in the religious section , I suppose you want a religious answer .
One of the ten commandments , " Thou shalt not commit adultery " .
Churches make rules and laws by the hundreds , but the really big ones are the ten commandments . Many think that God is forgiving. Yeah , maybe .
If we're on this earth as a testing ground to determine who's worthy of heaven , all of our transgressions will have to be laid out on the bench to be judged by the big guy on judgement day .
If you're religious at all , obey the commandments above everything else . Otherwise prepare for some free heat .
2007-10-28 05:37:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
The idea of premarital sex being wrong is ludicrous. To me it seems as something added to the Bible to prove that people are sinful. Of all the sins there are this is the hardest for anyone to stay free from.
It is wrong for children to have sex. I refer to a child as a person of any age who is not ready to or cannot deal with any of the consequences that sex can bring about.
Otherwise, I see nothing wrong with premarital sex. Almost half of those who answered this question feel it is wrong. How many of them do you believe are truly abstaining? ;)
2007-10-28 05:36:57 · answer #4 · answered by gigilunadragon 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It is entirely your choice. However, if you are religious and your belief system forbids it, you should follow this rule. If you are not religious and do not see this as a reason to to hold off, keep in mind that there are many diseases out there that are spread through sexual contact. Also realize that a lot of people that are very active, may not be very honest about their history and any possible disease they might have. Just keep yourself safe and don't believe everything you might be told by a new aquaintance. Even safe sex practices will not guarantee that you will not contract something.
2007-10-28 05:31:44 · answer #5 · answered by Solitairie 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It's the same reason extreme violence for young children is "wrong" it de-sensitizes people. Every time two people join together in "sex" it's like glue on two pieces of paper. There is a joining of sorts, the two pieces of paper are pulled apart something rips away from the other in the process. The Paper is not "destroyed" and neither is the person but after awhile, there is damage. by the time a person finally gets with the person they should have children with and be with for life, there is not that sense of sacredness and awe and wonder that should be there to carry them through the hardships of a lifetime together. And we all know that couples not staying together takes a toll on children, without stability and consistency in their lives, it's hard for them to display those traits themselves. Hope that helps. I think that's only one aspect of why it's not good, I am not sure science can even begin to Measure the toll it takes on the human spirit, mind and sometimes the body in the sense of "damage".
We understand in many cases men are more "stimulated or turned on" by physical appearance' and accept that as fact. Well there is also a tendency for a guy to treasure someone who has been his and only his in a greater way. that' just a couple of good points of why it's not "good" to have pre marital sex. If You are truly with the one you will commit to for life it may be okay. I have a son who did that and she Dumped him and he planned to marry her. Now he's been struggling to hang on to his sanity because he gave his heart for life but she apparently did not return that so now........we have someone with a broken heart and the other going on to the next thing. This to me speaks of a good reason to WAIT.
2007-10-28 05:28:25 · answer #6 · answered by sisterzeal 5 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Sex before marriage has become so common for many reasons. Far too often we focus on the “recreation” aspect of sex without recognizing the “re-creation” aspect. Yes, sex is pleasurable. God designed it that way. He wants men and women to enjoy sexual activity (within the confines of marriage). However, the primary purpose of sex is not pleasure, but rather reproduction. God does not outlaw sex before marriage to rob us of pleasure, but to protect us from unwanted pregnancies and children born to parents who do not want them or are not prepared for them. Imagine how much better our world would be if God’s pattern for sex was followed: fewer sexually transmitted diseases, fewer un-wed mothers, fewer unwanted pregnancies, fewer abortions, etc. Abstinence is God’s only policy when it comes to sex before marriage. Abstinence saves lives, protects babies, gives sexual relations the proper value, and most importantly honors God.
Recommended Resource: Why True Love Waits by Josh McDowell.
2007-10-28 05:32:37 · answer #7 · answered by Freedom 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Each of us is made in the image and likeness of God. Our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit. We are called to be dignified and not fornicate like base animals.
The Church teaches that it is adultery and a deadly sin.
1Ti 3:15 if I am delayed, you may know how one ought to behave in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and bulwark of the truth. (n.b. he did not say that the Bible was the pillar and buylwark of the truth.....but the Church who wrote the Bible.)
2007-10-28 05:33:54 · answer #8 · answered by The Cub 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If the two are consenting and love each other, no prob. But if it's rape, then...duh! However, most of the time, premarital sex is done by those who go out and love each other, so no prob. I do not think that if a guy and girl love each other, it's exploitation. In marriage there's just as much exploitation as there is in dating....hope this helps! ^_^
2007-10-28 05:26:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
DISEASE. However that didn't stop me and I caught goneria (I think that's how it's spelled) from an exotic dancer. But I managed to get rid of it with penicillin. Yeah, I had to learn the hard way as well.
2007-10-28 05:37:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋