Not exactly health question, but if anyone should know, it should be a woman?

Question

i go to a small high school with about 70 kids in our freshmen class(one of which being me). I met a bunch of people and got to know them, and i guess everyone at the school has friends. In one of my classes, for the first 2 weeks, no one sat next to me(even though i had friends in that class) and my friend in front of me made fun of me for it. Then, a girl who was not exactly shy, but not incredibly outgoing started to sit next to me. We would silently tell jokes and pass notes and things and the teacher caught us a few times she bcame a friend soon too and i started talking to her more at school and online. One day, we had a project due where we had to make a model of 2 things and she told me on the bus, hers broke. we got to the class it was due for and she told the teacher, but the teacher made her present her project anyway and it was horrible...the teacher tore her apart. she came back to the table we were sitting at and started crying, but i didnt notice. then she woulnt lift

her head, so i nudged her and asked her what was wrong and she tarted writing a note which basically said how crappy her day has been and i felt bad. somewhere on the note, it said "fu*king" and then the teacher saw the note,took it away, and called her out into the hall. By then i couldnt really help her, so i just told her it would be fineand they couldnt suspend her. She did get sent home and since then we've been closer friends. We now have this "lunch study" thing that we both have to go to and we talk in there too. after that we hang out for the rest of lunch. i really think im falling for her...the only problem is she has a boyfriend. Theres a dance/ball coming up and she asked me if i had a date yet. and i said not yet. then she said how she didnt want to bring her boyfriend because its kinda formal and he might be anti-social or a jacka*s. so i asked her if she wanted me to ask her and she said "no, i hope you weren't hoping or planning to take me. I'm really sorry if you were

I would have asked her and i felt stupid after asking her if she was asking me, but i thought she was hinting at it, even if we only went to the dance together. The boyfriend goes to a different school and i havn't met him. I dont know what to do though. the ball is about a month away. I really like her as a friend and i just think its not good for our relationship if im falling for her and i know its probably just hormones...or shes just really special. What do you think i should do?
p.s. sorry about the long question

Answer 1

She likes you as a friend, for now at least. Either try and stay a good friend and see how things evolve. Maybe she will break-up someday with her boy friend and you can try again asking her out. But if you feel its too much for you sitting so close to her and not becoming her boy friend, maybe you ought to tell her frankly that its time to move, as you know she has a boy friend. I am sure she will understand what you are saying without too much explanation. She might feel hurt a bit that you fore sake the friendship but she will understand. No use crying over spilled milk, its nice to have friends and its important to have someone you really like, but if you feel you are falling in love and it won't be reciprocated, just move your seat. (I am a woman)

Answer 2

Life as a teenager is difficult at the best of times. I have been in your situation before although in reverse. From reading your question i got the impression she was dropping hints for you to ask her. But then if she has said no, then respect that and dont risk losing your friendship over it. Just continue to be a great friend and if and when the time is right it will develop into something more. Everything happens for a reason so just go with the flow and what is meant to be will eventuate. Do you have any other female friends you could ask to the ball ? Maybe even someone that is not so popular maybe hoping someone will ask them. Take a look around you and see how many lonely girls there are hoping for you to notice them. Best of luck with it all, hope you have a fun night at the ball.

Answer 3

You sound like a good friend. Keep being that good friend.

Don't expect more from her right now, but if she wants someone to go to the dance with, explain to her you understand she has a boyfriend but if she wants someone to go to the dance with, as a friend, you are willing to go with her. Don't make any moves or anything or it could mean ticking her off and losing her as a friend.

Just keep being a friend to her. It's possible she may break up with him in a long while. High school is full of ups and downs like that. Just be there for her. If you want something more, and you're a good friend you have a better chance of becoming something more should the opportunity present itself.

Answer 4

Did you know that 50% of Americans getting married get divorced. Many people are confused just like you and her. Nobody knows the future. Just let things unfold and all you can do is work on improving yourself. Tell her that you would love to take her but she has things to work out with her boyfriend. Then just be her friend.

One girl like me and wanted to see me as a friend even though she had a boyfriend. I took her on 2 dates but when we first went out she expressed that she kind of had a boyfriend but no longer.

But he was afraid of losing her when she went out with me and got re-involved with her. So I stopped seeing her even though she wanted to keep seeing me as a friend and she did like me as a boyfriend. I now know that she was confused and if I would have continued to be friends with her and see her (she lived an hour away), I would have been her boyfriend a short time later since she left her boyfriend a short time later.

Answer 5

In short, I think you should just continue to be her friend, but don't "fall" for her. You're both pretty young. In fact, date some other girls.

It sounds like she may be trying to figure out if she should break up with her boyfriend, if he acts the way she says. That's her journey. If you're just there, and friendly, maybe she'll make the right choice. Just don't look too much like you're waiting for her.

And it also sounds like she's got a lot of negativity in her life right now. Be careful about making it your own. We all have our own journey, you can't save her from hers.

Answer 6

I believe you need to step up and say something.
Tell her she needs to quit leading you on, if the path is going no where. Bring it to her attention that you really like her.
Girls notice self confidence very fast, but not cockyness.
Just bring it up when you two are alone, but don't pry at it. You can't force anyone to like you.

I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 7

i dont really know ur question...you definatly shouldnt ask her out or to the dance cuz she has a bf...you dont want to be responsible if something happens to them...i would just be a good friend to her...maybe one day it will turn into something!

Answer 8

just ask her. the only way you'll ever know is by asking. I know it's hard and can be very intimidating and nerve racking but if you don't ask you'll by thinking about all the what ifs

Answer 9

just ask. it doesnt hurt to ask. the worst is she will say no. but if you never ask you will never know.