16 years old 35 weeks pregnant?

Question

Im 16 and 35 weeks pregnant.
im starting to get really scared about the birth labor and raising my child.
i know every pregnant woman goes through this but i feel as though because of my age i am extremely stressed.

any advice?
anyone else going through the same thing??

Answer 1

You will be fine. Remember that your body was made for this and knows what to do. Women have been giving birth since the beginning of time.
You should be concerned with raising a child at 16, you are only a child yourself and will need a lot of help, emotionally and financially.
You may want to consider adoption, it isn't too late.

Answer 2

I encourage you...you will be ok. If you haven't thought through a birth plan (just some basics about how you hope it will go) maybe do that now and talk to dr about it at your next appt. Do you have a friend or family member that you are wanting to assist you in labor? Get a "goodie bag" ready. Pack a sock with rice or dried beans to microwave and use as a heating pad. It will feel great on your lower back - even if you plan on a epidural you will have pain before it. Pack some easy snacks for them. The hospital won't likely let you eat, but they can stay with you continually if they don't have to run to a snack machine. Pack in a hand held massager, your favorite teddy bear, a journal to record everything asap after it's over (it's true, you'll forget the pain and you don't want to forget the good stuff too. Also, if something doesn't go just as you would've liked, journalling about it can make it easier to accept and move on to mothering.) Don't forget a nursing bra if you'd like to breastfeed. I know some think young moms shouldn't "bother", but you're going to be a mom. Regardless of your age I am sure you are interested in doing good things for your little one. If you try bf you may find it is a perfect fit for you and your new little! It could be that you do it for a long time or a short time, but if you never do it you'll never know. A young mom friend of mine bf her baby when she was 19 and said she is so glad she did. Think about it!

As for labor and birth itself...it will come. It will be painful at times, it may not always go exactly as you planned, but in the end if you have a healthy baby it is a success! Try to relax through it, through the pain. That will get baby here faster. Tensing up will work against your contractions and be counterproductive. Try to relax your shoulders, neck, legs, even your fists. The more relaxed you are the faster it will be over with.

Then...ENJOY Baby! You're a mom!! Welcome to motherhood! I wish you all the best! Blessings!

PS Always remember too, that you have now reduced your chances at breast cancer in a big way because you carried a pregnancy to term before age 18. I know it's not our society's idea of what's "right", but by choosing life for your baby you have given your body a gift as well. Congratulations!

Answer 3

Being a mother is a very very wonderful, stressful, HUGE responsibility but its the most joy in my life. The best edvice I can give you is, stay in School, find help to get through college (the only way you will be able to support yourself and the child well). Not only that you will be your childs not only mom, but teacher for the next 5 years. You have to teach them morals, manners, talking, colors, shapes, respect....ect. Try taking an elective in school in child development or parenting. I never went through real labor so I can't help much there, I had a C-section which for me was much better. lmao. 16 hrs of labor would kill me personally. I have heard though, You want the epideral! (sp?) I know its gonna be hard to be a teenage mom, but if you do things right and Make the right choices like getting your education, I think you will do fine. Best of luck to you!

-Lorah

P.S. Don't pack too much for the hospital. I went home with 7 bags. WAY to much. They have everything you will need there. But I would bring a few personal items that you can't live without!! GL

Answer 4

I am 22 and pregnant... I understand completely why you are scared! You have to remember that women have been giving birth from the beginning of time! It is so natural and normal that there really isn't anything to be scared of... Stressing out will only hurt you and your baby... take deep breaths when you start to stress and try to forget about what you are worrying about... Once you go into labor, your doctors will give you an epidural for your pain (I'm sure you already know this) and I'm sure your baby will be born healthy...
Do you have your parents or the baby's father to help you? If you do than you won't be by yourself and that should take a lot of stress off this situation... If you love your baby then you will be a great mom and have no problem raising your child!!

Answer 5

Dont be scared. Every pregnant woman goes through it. Just think, soon enough you will have a beautiful baby girl/boy. Giving birth may be painful but it will be 100% worth it in the end. Whenever you feel stressed out, talk to the little miracle inside of you. that should keep your mind off from being stressed. Hope that helped hun. I wish the best for you and your baby! Good luck!

Answer 6

firstly I think that as a family you need to see a counsellor to give you all the support and help that is needed. As hard as it is you need to stick by your daughter, I am sure that underneath she is a nice girl. If you throw your daughterout, you not only turning your back on her but your turning your back on your grandchild who is already unwell. As far as school is concerned see if they can put your daughter intouch with someone who can help her plan her future, an educational psychologist maybe an option for you. Talk to your doctor about extra support from the health visitor and midwife for your daughter, attend your daughters hospital and scan appointment with her so she feels like she has support. If your daugher doesnt want to have the baby then you may need to discuss whats better for the child whether it be abortion or adoption however both these options could likey have an effect on your daughter but this baby is an innocent life and doesnt deserve to be brought into the world if there is no one wanting him or her. You say that she smokes so how does she get the money for this? If you give her money then stop doing that as she is clearly only spending the money on cigarettes. I am unsure about how the benefit system works over in germany but you maybe able to get a maternity grant for the baby once your daughter is 29weeks. In scotland the amount given is £500. As for the babies dad I really think that for now your daughter needs to stay away from him, if you or your daughter feel that he is a danger to both her and the baby thensee the police or a lawyer about a restraining order or something similiar. There is no easy solution to this but your daughter and the unborn baby are the most important people in the situation. good luck

Answer 7

Im 33 weeks pregnant with my second child and am starting to feel apprehensive about it all, but I don't know what advice to give you.
I know it is normal, but it must be harder with your age. I guess the best advice is to make sure you have a good, reliable support network that will be there when you need it. Read as much as you can, so at least you kind of know what to expect.
Labour is painful, but its also really rewarding, so try to focus more on the end result, rather than labour being scary.
As for raising your child it is difficult for everyone at different times, as everyone faces different challenges, but you learn as you go along. i found with my first son (I was 20 when i had him) my mothers group was invaluable, not only because you share ideas and problems, but it made me realise how lucky I was with my son, so I would really reccomend joining one of those groups.
Good Luck.

Answer 8

The labor and birth are the easy part, so I hope you've made some good long range plans for raising this child. At 16 it's going to be hard to give up your fun and dreams in order to provide what's best for your baby. Have you made sure the father is providing child support and that your own family is behind you in keeping this child? From now on, you have to think of your child first and make the sacrifices.

Answer 9

just stay calm. Don't get worried about it. Try to go to a birthing class to get a feel of the best positions for labor. the teachers will explain everything there. Everyone has different experiences. Mine was pretty good once I got the epidural =D! all I can tell you is that it is painful. so try out a birthing class. It'll help you stop worrying and get you prepared.

Answer 10

Every new mother has these moments of fear. You just decide to get over it. Being a good mom and making it through is based on choice. You decide you're going to do it no matter what it takes, and then you stop at nothing until its done.

I promise you that labor is not that bad. Its like a really bad period. Delivery hurts really freaking bad from when the baby crowns until the head is out. Thats a total of like... 2 minutes tops. Its more like two quick pushes. You literally are like "wow this hurts, THIS REALLY HURTS, THIS REALLY FREAKING... nevermind." Just like that. The harder you push the quicker its over.

The medication they give you for pain is great. So are spinal morphines.

Its the most amazing day of your life.

I have a friend who had her daughter at 16, and then another 2 years later with a different guy. She's 24 divorced twice- BUT she has been in a steady loving relationship with a man for almost 6 years, he treats her kids like they were his own. He loves her more than life itself, and takes such good care of them. She's currently working and getting a diploma in physcology. Her kids are awesome, and she's just like any other mom I know.

There is NO reason you cant find yourself in a great place for you and your baby.

Answer 11

I'm 27 and married and worried about labor and raising my child. It doesn't get any easier with age, marital status, or income. First time moms are just that at any age.

Come up with a birth plan with your doctor, and dictate all of your wishes (while being aware that plans may need to change at the last minute if there are complications). It may help you feel more prepared, and relax you about some of the unknown. It'll be fine. Women do it every single day, there's no reason why we can't. Good luck to you.