I have been back from Iraq for about 5 months and I am getting ready to return to the states, after living in germany for 6 years with my german wife. Our relationship has been rocky and I feel it is getting worse. We have 2 kids that I want to have in my life, so I dont want to leave her but at the same time I feel every person deserves happiness. Sex is boring, argue and fight all the time, and I am starting to see her as a Snobby B*@#H, she is getting really erogant and rude. So how do you know when or if you should end your marriage and if so, should I do something before we leave or wait till we get back?
2007-10-27 05:21:10 · 4 answers · asked by Soljer126 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
not untill you have tried everything i guess. i believe there must be very good reasons for you to marry her in the first place and you two share kids together. why not try counselling, changing yourself and talking to her to see what problems are. if you end this now without knowing you have tried hard to save it and know the reasons why, you may find yourself facing the same problems again in your next marriage/relationships! no relationship is perfect from the beginning to the end. and we repeat our life all the time. good luck!
2007-10-27 05:33:16 · answer #1 · answered by xyz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to see about sitting down with a counselor to see if that helps. It may be that she thinks you are going to leave her and come to this country without her, as perhaps some have done, and so she is building up a defense mechanism before there is a need for one. Perhaps she is used to not having you there and without realizing it you are upsetting a routine she had during the 5 months that you were gone. If you are just back from Iraq, I would try the counseling before anything else and see if there is a way to save the marriage because it may be very hard on the kids to have one parent in the U.S. and another in Germany if she wants to stay there and you want to return to this country. If you wait until you get back, it gives the two of you time to perhaps work together to solve your differences and regain what you had when you first married. It may also be that you have changed because of the time in Iraq and don't realize it yet so talking may make this work out for you both.
2007-10-27 12:40:15 · answer #2 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask that question to yourself...Is your marriage still worth keeping? Do you still love your wife? If the answer is yes, then give your marriage a chance. Talk to her or attend a marriage counseling....But if you don't care about your wife anymore, ask for a divorce or legal separation....It's better to end your relationship....It will do no good to your kids if they always see you fight with each other....It's not healthy anymore now that you think of her as a 'b@#%h' when some years ago, you thought that she's the most beautiful person in the world...
2007-10-27 12:35:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This does not sound good. This is easier said than done, but cut your loses, you will always be the father of your children.
Read "The Invitation" by Oriah Mountain Dreamer
2007-10-27 12:31:13 · answer #4 · answered by Ken H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋