Bridal Registry?

Question

We're getting married in August of 2008. My fiance and I are very torn when it comes to the bridal registry. We both dislike the idea, but some people have requested that we register in order to get an idea of what we want/need. We ended up registering at two stores with a total of about 10 items in order to satisfy those that would prefer to use a registry to buy gifts. We plan to tell people about the registry ONLY IF THEY ASK. There will be NO notification of the registry in any invitation.

I still feel uneasy about the whole registry thing and am half tempted to delete them. What do you think? Do you agree that they are tacky? OR do you like to have a registry to decrease the stress of gift buying?

By the way, my fiance and I are both 30 and pretty much established. That's yet another reason that we really didn't want to register. We both have the basics of what we need...you know, without being greedy.

Answer 1

When handled properly they are great! Nobody wants to spend hours gambling what you want and some people are just uncomfortable with cash. Naturally if we are spending money on gifts we want them to be something desired and not end up rotting in a closet. Registries prevent that....and in some cases save money because if I find a $60 item on sale it looks much better than just handing you the $30 I could afford.

You've jumped the hurdle that makes most people think of registries badly by treating them as a helpful tool for guests who ask and not as a "gimmie gimmie" list.

Answer 2

I got married this last august and found the registry a huge relief. I registered at Target and Macys. It think its a great idea because I've been in that situation where I dont want to get a gift that the bride hates and will never use...or the color is wrong. So, if want your guests to get you items that you like then keep the registry. You will get lots of double gifts and not to mention things you dont like. Registries are not tacky. Its the new thing to do, especially for the younger crowd. Although, my grandparents bought us many of the items we wanted based on our registry. I would recommend putting a large variety on the registry, from expensive to cheap. That way your guests can pick what they want to get you. Also, the stores give away (for free) cute cards to insert in the invitations. Take advantage of that because you WILL get more presents. Unless you just want a card with money; dont expect to many gifts.

Answer 3

Registries are fine! As long as you aren't handing out registry cards or tucking them in your invitation. I registered at Target for things I knew we needed... or could use byt wouldn't go out and buy ourselves. And we are over 30 and pretty much established.

But ya know what... after ten years, my towels were looking pretty sad, so I registered for some towels. Now we have some nice fluffy towels and can get rid of some of the ones that were getting thinner and threads coming loose, etc.

And a fresh set of sheets was nice.

And I registered for a coffee pot. Mine broke.

And a double griddle.

A few fresh kitchen towels....

Look around the house. Certainly you have some things that might be on their last legs... or some small item you may not buy yourself... like a blender maybe...

Go ahead and find a few more things. And in several price ranges.... if you have a shower, your guests will need it. People tend to brings gifts to a shower.. and money to a wedding

Answer 4

As a wedding guest, registries really do help us to decide what to get you. You are right that they should never be mentioned in invitations - that is actually bad etiquette. The fact that you are registered should just be spread by word of mouth. But it takes a lot of pressure of of us to figure out what you want or need.

Lots of unconventional stores have registries now - friends of ours used Home Depot and REI. So it doesn't have to be sheets and china if that's not what you guys want. Or you can simply say you don't want gifts if you have a problem with registering. But saying you only want cash or gift cards is tacky (although I think the gift card approach is OK if you are moving right after the wedding and don't want to pack a lot of gifts).

Registries also help avoid returning 10 toasters or getting more of the inevitable clunker gifts (you would not believe one clunker I received - I still wonder what they were thinking!!!)

Answer 5

Hi Lisa:

Why don't you like it? As a guest, it's easy....it's what the couple wants! There is nothing WRONG in registering. Wow, I can think of a lot more than 10 things! Yes, it makes it sooo much easier on the guest (and you!), because if it's something you really hate....well, either your stuck with it, or you will have to find out where they bought it from to return it. Some stores only give credit...not cash...so, again, I love the registry!

Answer 6

Registries are good for the guest because they know you’ll like the gift and they know nobody else has gotten it for you yet (as long as EVERYBODY goes by the registry) If people want to get you an item that is not on the registry, they still will. The registry is nice for people who aren’t sure what to get you though.

Answer 7

Personally, I love them, especially when it's done at a mid-level store (i.e. Target - that's my shopping range)

The nice thing about a registry is that if people see you have the toaster you want, you're less likely to get 3.

Also, not everyone shops from the registry.

I try to use them as a guideline as to what the couple wants/needs.

Answer 8

What about registering at someplace fun? A lot of stores are carrying bridal registries now. Like if you and your finace love camping, why not register at a sporting goods store or registering for a honeymoon?