ok, me and my best friend both cut last year. We've both been trying really hard to stop but i seem to be having a harder time then her. Well everyday i check her wrists for new scars/cuts, and she checks mine. Up untill now neither of us had cut for like the past 5-6 months, but last night i got really upsetbecause of something my bf said/did and i ended up cutting myself. Me and my friend had our usual 'wrist check' today in school and like always she didn't have any cuts but when she went to check mine i kinda pulled away and she guessed right away that i had cut. Now she's saying im not trying as hard as she is, (which isn't true, if anything i wanna quit more then she does), and she wont talk to me. She said she didn't wanna be friends with someone who wanted to kill herself. What should i do!?
2007-10-26 12:30:42 · 6 answers · asked by cdr dsw = <3 [11/1/10] 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Cutting isn't the problem itself, it's a symptom of the problem. It's a coping mechanism. It's like, if you eat too much when you're unhappy, and then you and your friend decide to go on a diet together, then you get dumped and eat a whole pack of Oreos. It's not because you don't have willpower, it's because you're so upset and you don't know what else to do. I think you should sit down with your friend and explain what happened. She reacted the way she did (I'm guessing) because she was so upset - she loves and cares for you, and she is trying to protect herself from the pain of losing you by pushing you away. If you reassure her that you aren't going anywhere, that you know why you did what you did and you're trying to figure out other ways to deal with your emotions, I think she'll understand. After all, she has the same unhealthy way of dealing with emotions. Maybe she was afraid she'd get so upset about you that she would cut herself!
Have you seen a counselor about this? People who cut do it because of negative emotions (or because they're feeling numb - which is another way of having negative emotions). A good counselor can help you figure out better ways to deal with the bad stuff. For example, if you really really feel the need to cut, try holding an ice cube on your arm instead. No permanent damage, and it can help for a while. There's a bunch of suggestions like that, and they can help for the short term, while you're learning more about being healthy and at peace. I'll put a site below where you can learn more.
Oh, and if you ever get a counselor that you can't relate to, fire her/him and get another one. Keep looking.
Good luck!
2007-10-26 16:17:52 · answer #1 · answered by Kirsten 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What You Sure Have Is stress But What you need to Make time for Is Time For relaxing And Just Ignore All Your Problems that Go In Your Life And Just Forget About It And Well I Don't really You Friend Is Actually A Good friend Because If She Was A Really Good Friend She Will Spend Time And help You On whatever You Are Going Thought And Help You Stop Cutting Yourself Remember: YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF YOUR EMOTIONS YOUR EMOTIONS ARE NOT IN CHARGE OF YOU...OK Just Say That To Yourself Maybe That will Help Oh And Think Positive Well I Hope You Get Better...
2007-10-26 13:02:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she was ur best friend, she would be there for you. she would be trying to understand. i know that this is a tough position, because trust me, i've been there (not the cutting part, just losing a BFF) umm... about the cutting thing, i knew someone last year and she was big into this cutting stuff. i always thought she was crazy out of her mind, but if you going through a rough time i can understand. but this is not a healthy way to make yourself feel better. you need to give your friend a week or so to cool off and relieze that she is losing some1 that is important to her; then you tlak with her about this. try to help EACH OTHER through this. if you need to talk to some1 your age and that is an expert in the "losing friends" area my email is k8e71
-good luck!
2007-10-26 13:23:43 · answer #3 · answered by K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should put ur anger on something other than urself
i don't think you want to kill yourself i just think you want to quit
but even though i'm no doctor and i don't have any personal experience i think that maybe you should throw ur stuffed animals or something instead
just step by step day by day.. haha like the song!
I think you should kinda separate for a while and let her collect her thoughts and let you collect ur thoughts
then maybe a week after you can approach her about it..
or you can get help from a pro ;) it won't hurt!
good luck~!
p.s. i think it's good that you and ur friend actually decided to try and quit :) that's one step forward !
2007-10-26 12:38:23 · answer #4 · answered by ♥ mimi ♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you let her down with your end of the deal , you both agreed not to cut anymore and didn,t for months ,then you renigged on the deal, of course she is upset with you . she is your friend who went to a agrement with you and you broke it , why shouldn,t she be upset . stop cutting yourself stick to your word ..your friend obviously cares about you , why would you throw it back in her face and then wonder whats wrong with her ... you really need to keep this friend as she appears willing to help you ...friends keep to there word !
2007-10-26 12:51:07 · answer #5 · answered by justanother1 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She's not a real friend then
2007-10-26 12:35:29 · answer #6 · answered by ~ JoN ~ 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋