you might be intersted to know what my girlfriends religious parents said to me the other day.?

Question

mmmk

im not really your average christian

i listen to metal music (slipknot, avenged sevenfold) and cuss (and yes i have a reason why). i laugh at ironic things about christianity and religious jokes. i have alot of friends that arent christian. and i go to church sometimes.

but this guy had the nerve to say this to me.

"your on the path to burning in a lake of fire. you shouldnt listen to the music you listen to because it intoxicates your mind. until you dont your not allowed to date our daughter anymore."

what do you think about that?

lol

i probably should have.

that would have pissed him offff

saying me having a reason to cuss is ignorant?

here is my reason

the bible said "let not filth come out of your mouth"

but i think that means that you souldnt make people feel bad or make fun of people

everyone has a right to their own opinion right?

Answer 1

You shouldn't have to change who you are for anyone but it sounds like he (like any other father) wants the best for his daughter. I would say that if you like this girl you might try attempting to see her father's point of view but, unfortunately religion is one of those things that you have to decide for yourself that you are ready for.

It might take a while. Trust me my own father is a preacher and he tried to force religion on me but it wasn't until I turned 31 that I decided I was ready for it. In my own time and on my own terms.

Answer 2

If this were an orthodox Jewish father or a Muslim father most of the people responding about how heinous this is would just say that's their culture and maybe you just can't overcome the distance butthe father has a right to set limitations for his daughter while she is his charge. But make the guy Christian, God forbid, and suddenly he looks like gestapo, yes? he's looking out for his daughters' best interest as he sees it. If that includes someone who doesn't listen to what can rightfully be considered violent music, who knows to use respectful language in the company of elders, who shares the faith he believes in - I fail to see how the guy has committed a great atrocity.

I'm sure his daughter disagrees with his standards and beliefs and when she is an adult she can choose to do as she pleases but parents have to set some boundaries even when they go too far. If my son wants to date a nihilist vampire chick I'm not going to act cool just so I can be PC or anything. While I would likely not impose my beliefs on her in a judgmental way, or even prevent him from seeing the girsl, I would contiually suggest there are plenty more fish in the sea.

Answer 3

I think you are entitled to do as you please, either listening to metal music or not. It seems to me however that you like this girl, and there is a saying: "All things are lawful, but not all things are advantageous." SO , give it some thought, if you want to have a nice relationship with a girl who has standards,
you might have to give up something-and maybe some of your associates. You can't always have it both ways. If you want a person who has certain beliefs, well you might have to make a few sacrifices: meaning-trash metal music. If you're sitting on the fence, look at religion whose bible based belifs refute hell-fire. (I wrote a better piece explaining the difference between (Greek, Latin) Hades (hell as you refer to it) & Sheol-which is rendered down to the common grave of mankind-anyway, it means death, or second death what he is in my opinion erroneouslly referring to. See for yourself at Revelation 20: 13-15, explains it very nicely. Also Acts24:15, & 16 complete the picture. I think you'll have a clearer picture of death, and the reserrection. Remember fire is a symbol for cleansing in many contexts of the bible. However, there is no life after the 2nd death. Thankfully, it does not involve burning alive, it means your dead.

Answer 4

I think that regardless of whether you are right and he is wrong or whatever, that there will continue to be animosity and bad feelings if you try to continue this relationship against their wishes.

Part of it may just be a "daddy" thing--nobody ever thinks anyone is good enough for his baby girl.
Part of it may be intolerance on his part, but I must admit, the cussing and making fun of religious things would trouble me a bit, too as a parent.

Maybe you need to do some soul-searching and see if there is any room for improvement on your part.
The Bible verse about "being unequally yoked to unbelievers" holds true in life. It also applies I think to committed Christians unequally yoked with marginal Christians, and those of very incompatible denominations. For every time I've seen it work, I could give at least ten examples of when it didn't. My own marriage to someone I thought I knew and who I thought shared my beliefs ended badly when he never "grew up" and took his role seriously as spiritual leader of our home. If this is what she has been taught, regardless of how she thinks she feels about you or them now, I promise you she will go back in that direction as she grows up (or either both of you will fall further away, which isn't good either!)

You don't have to like what he said, you don't even have to agree with him. But respect him; he's her dad.

Answer 5

The reality is you will probably have to deal with people like that at some time or other. But think, if you date this girl you will have to deal with it a lot. So, is the relationship with the girl worth it, I mean how does She feel about what her parents think and about you and how do you feel about her?
The parents may be wrong and I believe they are but obviously she is a minor.
And you really should not be "in their face' by cussing in front of them.
If you want others to respect your version of Christianity you must be prepared to respect theirs.
So, is this just a "Who do you think you are to say I'm wrong?' issue or is it a "You're breaking my heart" issue?
You haven't gone into much detail, but I say you must pick your battles in life.



Edit: I was wondering if you are really going to read all these answers. Coz mine is w a y at the bottom.lol

Answer 6

I think that's just ridiculous, but not surprising. Pretty much every generation in history has thought that the next generation is going strait to hell for their " behavior". On the flip side the next generation tends to think the previous one is full of a bunch of people that are too up tight.

But I say screw his opinion and do what u can regarding this girl. Besides the forbidden love might make things more fun ;)

Answer 7

His delivery was horrendous, however. With all due respect, I am sure most dads dont want thier little girls hanging out with bfs who make jokes at teh extpense of other beliefs, listen to slipnot and curse. Could you be worse? Of course. Could you be better? of course. Nothing wrong with a parent wanting the best for their kids. I'm sure youre a fine kid, but I can also understand wanting good influences around my kid as well. Why is being a clean decent kid who doesnt curse such a bad thing nowadays?

Answer 8

wow. I'd have, like, kicked him in the head. What does your girlfriend think? I don't think you should change unless you want to and he's got a lot of nerve to say that. But then again I've had people be retards to me and say crap like that just because of the path I'm on. Talk to your girlfriend, and maybe [i don't know what kind of person you are so i can't give you the greatest advice] you can pretend that you changed. Just around her parents, and lie a little... everyone does and according to him you're going to hell anyway [which is b/s but w/e lol]

Answer 9

I'm sure there are plenty of fellow Slipknot fans who would be a better match for you. The father is concerned about the influence you would have on his daughter. His concerns aren't limited to only the music and language. He is being protective and has every right to be so. Respect his wishes, stay away from his daughter.

Answer 10

I think it's rude, over stepping his boundries and annoying. My nine year old son has so many friends in school that say Halloween is the devil's birthday. My son started feeling bad about going trick or treating! It's one thing to discuss religious topics when both parties agree to it. You should not push beliefs onto someone else. We have Harry Potter books and my son's friend's grandmother [if that makes sense!] told us that we are devil worshipping because we read them. This was way before JK Rowling pulled that stunt about a character being gay. It's outrageous. I think the man is WRONG.

BTW I listen to alternative and metal. I'm 40 and people think I'm devil worshipper. In reality I have a strong faith. People don't know what they are saying.

Answer 11

Being a Christian means certain things. It does not mean that you are a nice person. It means that you think God became a man, died for your sins, and raised from the dead. He ascended into "Heaven" and is seated by the right hand of HIMSELF. If you believe those things, and you love this girl, then only listen to the music when she won't tell on you.