been in and out of jail for drugs/robbery, recently shot because gang bangers after him and drinks heavily? He is real nice but tons of problems. We want to go out but don't have a sitter avail so my husband thought to ask her. I said if she comes to our house alone I don't mind but now its a problem because the boyfriend wants to come and they want to take our son (10 yrs) miniature golfing. This guy was just shot in June because people are after him for snitching on some drug dealers. My step daughter says there is no problem now so am I being paranoid to say no? My husband had the nerve to say for me to make the decision..what a dumb a**. Now my mom is saying give them a chance. My son is at an impressionable age. I don't want him influenced negatively or worse they have him try pot or something and say don't tell your mom. I have all these scenarios in my head. I know I have mental issues but that's beside the point. I just want feedback not putdowns or I'll block you.
2007-10-26 07:02:07 · 7 answers · asked by Wonder Woman 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Yeah, I am not judging but I feel I have to stand my ground. My husband just doesn't like to get my stepdaughter mad. They already have a fragile relationship and he's afraid she'll be mad at him. I don't care what she thinks.
2007-10-26 07:08:05 · update #1
Thanks Melissa, your in the running for the 10 points.
2007-10-26 07:18:13 · update #2
Well we told and she is mad and doesn't want to talk to us. She said I am over reacting. Oh well. She said her boyfriend has changed..yeah in all of a week.
2007-10-26 09:43:14 · update #3
Personally I wouldn't want my son seen with this guy if there are people after him. Explain your fears to your stepdaughter. Tell her that you don't mind having her bf around, but you just don't feel safe letting your 10 year old out in public with him since his getting shot was so recent. She may say you're being paranoid, let her know that you're not against having him around, you just don't feel comfortable with them taking your son out. Allow her bf to spend time at your house while you're there so that way you can really get to know him. I don't think you're being irrational, unreasonable, or not giving the bf a chance by not allowing them to take your son out. Your fears are valid concerns, and should be respected as such. Overall go with your gut, you're his mother and ultimately the decision maker, trust your instincts, and don't let what anyone else says influnce you away from that. Good luck!
2007-10-26 07:13:21 · answer #1 · answered by Melissa, That's me! 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The most important part of this is the well being of your 10 year old son. If this character your step daughter is dating makes you question weather your son is in good hands then act accordingly. If your step daughter is incapable of spending time with her little brother without him it is her loss. Your husband need to make good decisions for his 10 year old son who still needs a lot more of him than his 20 year old daughter (no disrespect for their relationship intended because it is also important). If you do not want the boyfriend around and it is the only way she will watch him, you have every right to cancel your plans rather than jeopardizing what is best for your son. You have the right idea, stand your ground for your son because it sounds like you may be the only one willing to do so. God bless and good luck.
2007-10-26 14:48:59 · answer #2 · answered by joe 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Would you let a regular babysitter bring someone around your son like that? Why should family be any different?
If it was me I wouldn't let her have him around my son alone. When I babysat - whether it was for family or not - I wasn't allowed to have my boyfriends over. I'm not sure I ever asked, it was just a given. She's there to watch your son - not hang out with her boyfriend.
2007-10-26 14:12:04 · answer #3 · answered by charlie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you want your 10 year old son to emulate a man like this? Little boys copy older men much more quickly and much more severely than little girls copy their peers.
Its not complicated, its common sense.
2007-10-26 14:06:02 · answer #4 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO. keep your son away from that loser at all costs. And, there is no need to be polite about it. Let him know you dont want him around your kid, and tell him why.
2007-10-26 14:06:48 · answer #5 · answered by Andrew 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. No. No. Why would you even consider allowing this?
2007-10-26 14:08:12 · answer #6 · answered by C>/ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
no, dont leave your child with them. snitchin is worse than pot
2007-10-26 19:08:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋