What kind of reaction did you have or receive from friends or family when you found out about the wedding being a no children reception??
2007-10-26 05:48:05 · 23 answers · asked by mastermind delinquent 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
It makes sense to me. Unless the kids are old enough to behave properly during a long event like a reception, they do not need to be there. People put too much pressure on kids to be little adults and then get upset when kids act like kids at an event like this.
There's also the risk of someone getting hurt when a little one is playing on the dance floor. Besides, the parents could probably use a night out without the kids to enjoy.
2007-10-26 07:05:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well the couple has the right to make this decision but it does mean some people will not be able to attend.
When the wedding is out of town and the whole family is at the wedding there is no person to leave your child with.
That happened to me. I missed a great wedding, my husband got to go and that is not fair either.
Trust me anyone who could not go because of your rule is not going to feel the same about you ever. It caused a rift in our family forever. Everytime someone brought up stories about that wedding and how great it was it just made me feel bad.
Some cultures a wedding is a family celebration and I would rather go to a less formal celebration than something so stiff that children are an annoyance.
Answer truthfully when was the last time you saw a wedding ruined by a child? Answer correctly it was someone's drunken uncle who ruined it.
I think it is that the drunken uncle or misbehaving aunt brings a gift so they are welcome and children do not.
Funny if you excluded a mentally challenged adult or one in a wheelchair you would get a lot of flak and you would disserve it but no one thinks excluding children at a family event is unfair.
Being Bridezilla you are going to have your own way so why ask people's opinions?
2007-10-26 06:02:33 · answer #2 · answered by Lynnie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm with Lynnie on this one. I've been to several weddings; the people you have to worry about are not the kids. They're the adults who get drunk and make fools out of themselves (e.g. the best man moons the bridesmaids at the reception. lovely.). I prefer to leave the 'kids or no kids' decision to the parents. We're inviting whole families to our wedding, although I'm pretty sure that our friends with young children will probably come without the kids.
Most parents I know use pretty good judgement regarding their kids. Even if you do invite the kids, chances are pretty good that the parents will still opt to find a sitter. They know they'll have more fun if they're not chasing after a 4 year old. If a kid gets fussy during the ceremony, the parents can quietly take the kid outside. At the reception, as long as the kids behave during the meal, it's fine. No one is going to be bothered by rowdy kids if there's a party going on.
2007-10-26 06:26:42 · answer #3 · answered by SE 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My family was completely thrilled! Even those with kids, had no problem with it. We are having a Flower girl and a ring bear one from each side of the family to make it fair. Here is what we told them and they all agreed. We had one or two say something but then after we made our point they were fine with the no kids rule.
I am having an evening wedding, sun set on the beach at hight tide, it will start at 7pm and dinner wont be till 8pm which is most children's bed time. Which this is when the get crankie, start whining,and acting up.We are having achool and don't want the children to be in that environment. Would you take your child to a bar which consist of music, dancing drinking, adults talking and catching up on old times (no right) Then why would you take your child to a wedding?
Plus in the mist of watching the bride and groom and talking with relatives do you really think there keeping an eye on jr? Or jr just isnt listening to his parents. Either way I have seen some brats at weddings. It is not the kids fault really it is the parents fault for not making there children mind.
Then we heard I might not be able to find a babysitter we trust? Will you have on at the weddiing? Here is where I get totally upset with parents. If you cant find a babysitter you trust why is it ok for the bride who doesnt have kids (most of the time) to hire a complete stranger to watch you children? Why because there not paying for it.
I am having a babysitter however for the flower girl & ring bear because we do not want the children in the "bar" enviroment. I however will be paying for those children to be watched, and they will be going upstair after dinner. If any one shows up with little susy in tow they will be paying the babysitter $15 and hour per kid. I how ever will not be telling any one I will have a babysitter on site other wise the poor girl will end up haveing 20 children running a muck in a hotel room!
This is just my opion though, thankfully my soon to be thinks the same way. Plus for those who get upset and complain about no children are only thinking of them selfs and are not the special people you thought they were and that you want to share your special day with.
Best wishes in planning your special day and remember do what you two want to do.
2007-10-26 08:23:57 · answer #4 · answered by typicalcagirl 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The is nothing incorrect about inviting adults to a social event without concerning yourself with their children. Childcare is the parents' problem, not the hosts'. If they want to attend badly enough, they will find a way to attend. Those who whine that they can't bear to spend an afternoon seperated from their little darlings are exactly the sort who will allow their children to whine or run wild.
The notion that if you invite your favorite nephew you must also invite all your co-workers' children is simply incorrect. You invite the children that you know well or care about and you don't invite those you hardly know and don't give a hoot about.
You didn't ask yet, but the way to do this is:
(1) Invite everyone by name, even children. No 'and guest' or 'and family' invitations. You'd think this would be an no-brainer where free champagne is involved. If you want to invite someone's BF or GF, you invite them by name. If you put 'and guest' then people feel obliged to scrounge up some sort of date. Why spend you wedding money on folks that not only do YOU not care about, but even the people that brought them don't care about?
(2) Do your RSVPing by phone. That way people can't pretend to misunderstand who is and who is not invited. Be prepared to say things like "I'd love to meet your new sweetheart, but the wedding is only for people we know" and "You've misunderstood; we've invited you and Uncle Fred but can't include the children." Nothing incorrect about friends and family helping you make and take all these RSVP phone calls.
Congrats & best wishes.
Added after reading other answers: People from out of town can (1) make arrangements to leave their children at home, (2) ask for help arranging a nanny or nurse from an agency, or (3) regret that they are unable to attend. It's just a fact of life that being a parent curtails social life and freedom to travel.
2007-10-26 06:10:57 · answer #5 · answered by kill_yr_television 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It kind of makes me think that the bride/groom expect a total chaotic disaster just because children are there...which is not what happens.
Just because parents are invited WITH kids, does not mean that they will BRING them....many parents are appreciative of the invite, but will get the babysitter and leave the kids home, which is perfectly fine.
It's just nice to see weddings that are open to children since some parents may not be able to find a babysitter. And if those parents are responsible at all, they will ensure that the kids don't get into any mischief that would potentially raise a scene. I've seen many parents run their screaming kids/babies out of a ceremony....or leave a reception early because kids were getting cranky. What's the big deal?
2007-10-26 06:10:08 · answer #6 · answered by High Fructose Corn Syrup 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
not very long lol. I actually posted a question on here about the problems I was having, and I realized that I was doing the right thing. Im glad my wedding is going to be a beautiful day just how I want it, and after apologizing for offending those who were upset, and explaining my fincancial reasons, I let the issue go. I would rather have a wedding that I can afford that is what I want than invite children or other guests I cant afford just to make others people happy. You have to remember this is about you, and so does everyone else.
2007-10-26 05:56:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I completly agree if you don't want children that is fine, I didn't have any children at my wedding because it can get costly paying full price for their meal when you know they will not eat it and it also give the adults a chance to let loose without their children. Anyone that gives you a hard time needs to understand one thing it is not their day or their party it is yours so forget what they think. I have a daughter and have been to weddings without children it was fun and I would never complain about something as simple as that unless I was paying and hosting the party! Hope that helps!
2007-10-26 05:58:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Nobody blinked an eye. I think they would have thought it strange if we had included children. There are no children in the wedding party, and the only child in the immediate family is a 10 year-old step-nephew. He can come if he wants. But friends' children aren't included. It's too expensive, and I don't think the atmosphere is appropriate for children (not to mention the ones that are ill-behaved). People recognize that our guest list is our choice.
2007-10-26 08:17:40 · answer #9 · answered by Trivial One 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This question always comes up at almost every wedding:
Should we invite children? Will the parents be offended if we don't?
Answer: NO! Many parents enjoy having a night out w/out the kids. You may have that one or two who get a little upset, but you just have to re-explain that you feel a wedding is an adult event and that you don't want to pay for extra people. Kids don't belong at a wedding unless you are having a BBQ type wedding. Period.
2007-10-26 05:53:04 · answer #10 · answered by Paula Christine 5 · 5⤊ 1⤋