Of course this question is directed at women...I am an exec assitant, I called a delivery company about a delivery that was not made when it was supposed to be made, and delivery instructions were not followed at all. A man answered the phone and said to me, after I explained what had happened, "Just a minute young lady...." I answered, "my name is not young lady it is Melissa" I think it is condescending to call a woman over the age of 18 "young lady", especially when that woman is an angry customer calling your place of business. Yes, I was already irritated when I called, and I doubt my male co worker would have been called :young man" had he called.
2007-10-26 05:27:51 · 20 answers · asked by Melissa 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I am in my 20's but I think its sexist and condescending, and is not the proper way to address an irate customer.
2007-10-26 05:35:29 · update #1
I cancelled my membership and quit going to the gym because the trainer kept calling me "young lady". I'm 51 and I NEED to go to the gym, but I would rather be called "old hag" (closer to the truth) than "young lady" by a twenty something man. It just grates on my nerves unless the person calling me that is old enough to be my parent.
2007-10-26 07:12:10 · answer #1 · answered by EvilWoman0913 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
It was totally inappropriate for a business professional to call you that, especially when you are on the phone placing a complaint. I would have respond the same.
When an old man (65+) calls me young lady, I usually don't care. Anyone else other than my father has no reason to do such a thing. I may only be in my mid 20's, but I deserve respect just like the next person.
Ma'am and miss work just fine when you need a generic word for a woman. It is hard to be young in an office setting, but that is no excuse for anyone to be disrespectful.
2007-10-26 05:46:02 · answer #2 · answered by Alyssa and Chloe's Mommy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OK, I'm just a man... so I don't expect the "yaya sisterhood" to agree with me. HOWEVER, think it through rationally before you jump to conclusions and become 'offended'. This thing of people being overly offended at everything, is like crying wolf. Eventually, no one will care if you're offended. Now, is this man you spoke older? If so, in his day, it was perfectly all right for a man to call a woman, "young lady" or "doll" and whatever other words that referred to women. He most likely didn't mean it as you thought and didn't even think about what he said. And yes your male coworker may also have been called "young man" or "kid". Don't get angry until you have proof positive that someone was REALLY 'offending' you. Think first.
2007-10-26 06:36:20 · answer #3 · answered by DB 4 · 1⤊ 4⤋
YES!! I am 72 and very offended by being called young lady. It is an insult implying I am so old I am flatterd by that comment. The only men that may call me that are ones older than myself. A 20 yearl old has no reason to call a woman my age young lady.Next time I will respond by call any kid who does this "old man". and see how he likes it.
2015-02-04 04:40:59 · answer #4 · answered by Linda 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, to be perfectly honest, that situation could've been handled better by BOTH of you. True, "ma'am" would've been a better choice of words for the man assisting you, but does that really justify a smart-aleky "my name isn't----" when he obviously didn't know your name? I can understand you being upset about the delivery, but I seriously doubt it was that man's fault and his alone.
I agree that "young lady" can be offensive to an extent (and depending on what context it's used in), but I don't let it get to me the level that you let it get to you. Perhaps the man was older and from a time when saying "young lady" was the norm. I usually give people the benefit of the doubt when they call me "young lady", and I think you should too.
2007-10-26 05:37:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
"Just a minute young lady...." is not the proper way to deal with an angry customer. Even if it was an older man and was ok "in his day" as others said, people have to understand that etiquette rules change, and what might have been ok 30 years ago is not ok now, and that especially in a business situation, we have to go by what is expected today.
2007-10-26 07:57:51 · answer #6 · answered by eastcoastdebra 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I'm not offended by it but then I'm often called honey, hon, dear, young lady, etc by older people in the community. It's kind of a regional thing like saying y'all. I do agree with you that in your particular situation, it was inappropriate because you were angry and because you were on the phone. There are ways to soothe angry customers and that was not it.
2007-10-26 06:09:44 · answer #7 · answered by Susan G 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
a older co worker at work called me ma'am a few times which bugged me then called me "young lady" I am not a kid and I am not middle age. Just call me by my name
2014-06-11 11:57:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anne Smith 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say there are two different scenerios for this. If it's a personal situation, then no, I'm not offended.
However, this is not acceptable in a business situation. It would have been more appropriate to say "ma'am".
2007-10-26 05:36:11 · answer #9 · answered by porcelina_68 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
i have to agree with DRDENNIE. I am a woman, better yet a lady and i don't mind it one bit if someone addresses me as "young lady" What is so codescending about that?
2007-10-26 09:18:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋