okay, i had to get someones attention, i dont really think that , but Im tired of hearing ..
"WHY GET MARRIED!??!?!
why would you want to do that??
wait as long as you possibley can IF you even decide to get married!! "
Why do people look down on marriage sooo much now-a-days????
Its not a BAD THING!!
whats your thoughts??
2007-10-26 04:19:15 · 37 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Well you have to look at what most people are these days.
Selfish.
When your married you do everything for your partner, Or should whatever the point is most people don't want to do that. Its sad really, my dream in life is just to be a good husband. I don't care what that requires me to do. How many women do you know that WANT to be a good wife?
And the other is peoples bad view at marriage. wife kids job.
Thats a bunch of crap. To me being married is that ONE girl made a promise to always be there for me and vice versa. We can figure out kids whatever as we go along. Besides, the healthy age for having kids is 27 -28. So why rush that?
2007-10-26 04:27:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Many people do not get married for the right reasons. You should get married when you love someone and they love you back JUST AS MUCH. I feel like so many people get married just because they feel like they are supposed to. WHy? They are getting old, or they have been with the same partner for awhile, or their friends are doing it. It is no wonder the divorce rate is so high, marriage has just become another trend like leggings or skinny jeans (which dont last long... remember the 80s...lol). Marriage is awesome when two committed people go into it together. It is a beautiful experience. The only stress should be planning the darn thing, but it is all worth it in the end.
2007-10-26 04:30:55 · answer #2 · answered by EmK 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you get married to the right person it's great. If you don't then it can be everything from mediocre to sheer hell.
I've been with my wife for 27 years, 25 of them married. We moved in together because we loved each other and we got married so we could buy a house and take advantage of any benefits society offered. We are very happy together but I think it just as much luck as it is anything else.
Since people have choices other than marriage (as little as 50 years ago it was the only way you can have regular socially approved sex), I think it's best to take it slow and not rush into it. One think I feel helps break up a lot of marriages is the lack of support from families, friends and society at large.
2007-10-26 04:32:29 · answer #3 · answered by brianjames04 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Marriage doesn't seem to be so popular in modern times anymore, where it's become acceptable to cohabitate. Yet I do feel that women will always long to be married (most of them anyway). You can just look at celebs, to see how popular it still is. Unfortunately many of them suck at it. Marriage is something that should be decided on with your heart and your head, but the logical part of it doesn't always seem to co-operate. I think it would be a good idea if people could go on an induction course on marriage before they are allowed to get married - just think how much money we would save the state and ourselves. Then about the children - it's absolutely not fair on children not to be married, they need the security and tradition. I think nobody should decide to have children without being married.
2007-10-26 04:38:24 · answer #4 · answered by CelesteMoone 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People these days don't take marriage seriously, and don't take it for what it truly is. They rush into it thinking it's supposed to be some fun ride, then when times get hard, the real people come out and they can't handle it and therefore think "marriage" is a terrible thing. Marriage is a life-long commitment that's made when two people truly love each other. Key word there, "life-long". I think a lot of people just go into it when it's fun, even if they have doubts, but know they can get out with a divorce and be done with it.
As long as you know it's right, and you take your time, there's nothing wrong with wanting to spend the rest of your life with someone. Rushing it is when you get the negative aspects of it. Marriage is a beautiful thing, but you have to work at it. It isn't always going to be peaches and cream.
2007-10-26 04:37:34 · answer #5 · answered by pd♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are reasons people say that. Usually it's because they've been burnt bad and because they're miserable and had a bad marriage (or two) they don't want anyone else to be happy.
I'm not sure how old you are, but if you're still quite young, this could be a big reason why people would say this to you. I'm not a fan of people getting married in their teen years or too early 20s.
Whichever way it is, I have not had this problem at all. I've been engaged for just over a month and every single person we've come across has been very supportive of us and couldn't be happier for us!
2007-10-26 05:01:15 · answer #6 · answered by Sunidaze 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have a feeling you are leaving out that you are young aren't you!!
In my experience all those comments are what my brother and his wife and my sister and her husband heard... and they found their spouses young and got married young... 20 and 21 (when they married). And all are still happily married and they have to work at it.
I however didn't hear anything negative when I got married at 28 years old. People were happy for me since I looked long and hard to find my spouse... plus I had sowed all my wild oats and had a fun single life through most of my twenties... so when I got married people thought that I wouldn't have any regrets!! The only exception is that one single friend who just had a bad breakup... and she came around and loves my husband too.
I would never EVER feel bad about something so wonderful happening to you!! Choosing a spouse is a huge decision and a wonderful gift!! There is nothing in the world like finding your significant other and making it official... not to mention how fun a wedding and honeymoon is!! Making memories of that special day last a lifetime.
Good luck and congrats.
2007-10-26 04:36:25 · answer #7 · answered by crissygirly 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Thats generally a mans perspective towards a wedding; I don't think I've ever heard someone suggest holding off as long as possible to a woman.
For a guy, its because if they ever get divorced, its a lot more difficult than merely breaking up otherwise, your social life is basically over as you now get to hang out with other married couples, how exciting... his married friends will also feel obliged to tell him that the sex will be less and less frequent, you get a huge debt unless her father is traditional and going to pay for the wedding (which is all about her)... and from that day forth, she is probably going to try and change him... most women do... something you don't get nearly as much when you're single. There really is no positive for a man, I mean he already has her... (woooo commitment, just what every man dreams of since he was young)...
2007-10-26 04:33:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Getting Married not a BAD THING. You're right. If you are willing to work and fight for it.
But the reality is, so many people, especially gals, when they think of marriage, they can't get beyond the ring and the dress. They don't think about the person that they are marrying (are they trustworthy? do they cheat? are they abusive? what about finances?...etc.)
People forget that marriage is a lot of work and compromise. They forget that it is a blending of two families. When things get rough, people want to runaway...the give up easy.
So yeah, if you think about all of these problems we have today, it does sound like marriage isn't such a good idea....
2007-10-26 05:05:56 · answer #9 · answered by Benji's Mommy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really can't establish a relationship with your brothers fiance just before their wedding. Was an effort made before this to get to know her. It sounds as though your family is not all that close to your future sister-in-law. However it does sound as though she is not considering your families feelings at all but, it really is her day and yes your brothers' but they are handling all expenses themselves. You sound like a nice caring person but at this point I think you and your family should take a deep breath and relax. Traditionally the grooms' family does not have that much say in the wedding other than handing over their invite list. Be happy for your brother, enjoy the wedding and remember your own wedding. Would you really have liked your husbands' family interferring in your day ? As far as choosing the bridal party, it usually is mostly the brides' side. Be happy, smile and don't ruin your brothers' wedding day over trivial occurences. All the best and good luck.
2016-04-10 07:11:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋