I am having a bday party for my 4 year old at a party place. My brother and his family 5 children didn't respond, my sis in law, 3 children didn't respond by rsvp date. My mother and father in law also did not respond. I tried calling but they didn't return the phone calls (this is typical). We are all on pretty good terms. I have to admit my husband and I are probably not the most punctual with returning phone calls or responding to get togethers. We also didn't call sis in law when her twins turned 9 earlier this month. I am not sure if they are coming and feel they don't have to rsvp because they are family. I have to give the party place a count of children and adults. There are already 17 classmates coming and the extra 8 would be a big differenc (financially). Not sure what to do.
2007-10-26 01:32:27 · 10 answers · asked by MrsMaltz 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I forgot to mention my bro and family are strictly kosher and I would have to make addditional arrangements with the party place.
2007-10-26 01:38:40 · update #1
Leave a voice mail and kindly state that since you did not get an RSVP you are assuming they're not coming so you've given the facility a final count. End the call with something friendly, like: "We hope to see you at Thanksgiving!"
Sometimes, it's better to make a solid statement rather than leave it open ended: "Are you coming?" The open-ended statement puts the situation out of your control. Making a firm statement, "I'm assuming you're not coming," makes it possible for you to do what you need to do.
2007-10-26 01:43:11 · answer #1 · answered by Tikva 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You teach people how to treat you. Why because they are family do they not have to rsvp?? I dont understand that. You have enough to do with 17 4 year olds coming. Call each one of your family and tell them because you havent heard and the place needed a count you told them they were NOT coming and you are so sorry to UNinvite them. That puts the blame onto you and there is no way they can tell you during that phone call that oh yes of course we are coming. This sounds harsh doesnt it, but unless you want to go through the same thing every time there is an event and you invite them and they will not rsvp, I suggest you do this. I think you are not focusing on your immediate family enough. No one should expect you to take care of kosher at a restaurant. They should come and give birthday wishes and then if they cannot eat the food, just drink water and go home and eat. You probably think Im nuts to suggest you tell them not to come but otherwise this will continue all your life.
2007-10-26 10:08:34 · answer #2 · answered by barthebear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would call again, and leave the message that you are also trying to get ahold of such and such and if they talk to them, have them call you. I would also email each of them, and I would drop a reminder by their house. Then if you don't hear from them I would assume they are not coming. You might want to put in two extra just in case the grandparents show up, but otherwise if they do, there is nothing wrong with say, "I tried to get ahold of you by phone, email and a personal visit, and you did not RSVP. I couldn't afford to assume you were coming, sorry." After all, are they there to celebrate your 4yr olds birthday or eat?
You might want to consider what you said about your family failing to do the very same things you are expecting others to do and make an effort to clean up your act.
2007-10-26 08:49:34 · answer #3 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If this is something your family normally does and they show up at other gatherings, then I'd assume they'd be coming. They are family. Usually you don't pay until everyone shows up at places like you're talking about. You could always call and leave a message saying you're going to assume they aren't coming and will inform the business there will only be 17 people attending the party because it's a pay per person event. If they want to come, then they will have to call.
2007-10-26 08:41:31 · answer #4 · answered by 2Beagles 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's very rude that your family members did not respond to your RSVP oir phone calls. Inform the party place how many will be there according to the RSVP's that you received.
2007-10-26 09:12:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure that they feel that if you don't respond then they don't have too either. I think if I were you start making that a priority and start responding their request and acknowledge all the special times in others lives too. I would plan on then coming but for sure keep calling, maybe one call isn't enough.
2007-10-26 08:38:25 · answer #6 · answered by Carol 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The proper thing-
Make reservations for the number you know are coming- tell the watiress/waiters that you will be paying for only those who are included in the reservation. Anyone else who shows up will be responsible for thier own meals.
2007-10-26 08:56:40 · answer #7 · answered by Rev. Deb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You ask them to RSVP ,they didn't ,so go on with your plans ,somestimes you have to teach them a lesson, its not
for you to change your plans around them
2007-10-26 08:57:27 · answer #8 · answered by elizabeth_davis28 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if you are on pretty good terms, then i would expect that they are coming. Just book their seats anyway, i would expect they are coming.
2007-10-26 08:38:53 · answer #9 · answered by s s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would call them asap..Let them know you need to know if there coming..have fun too!
2007-10-26 10:12:07 · answer #10 · answered by Thallasa35 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋