ok..i've got a prolem wih my dad....
i'm a papa's girl since i'm an unica hija,and he quite spoiled me,i grew up being a blunt person(i'm only 17),but when i tried to reason out ,my parents always take it as a 'talk back'....(now i dot have a very nice relationship wih them)....a week ago,my and my dad had an argument/debate(we always do,and he always win),but not this time,i know it,and i know he knows it too..(by the way,i'm in my second year in college),...the thing is he won't accept it...and he attacked my pride...and he laughed knowing i'm gonna cry in a minute,and claims that he won that debate,....i'm not a cry baby,the thing that hurt so much is that he's THAT kind of person,....and i idolized him,it hurts so much knowing it...he can't accept his defeat(maybe it's childish,but it does matter to me)......................................dads,what do you think my father is thinking?.....i hate him now..
2007-10-25 22:14:20 · 4 answers · asked by nap 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
One: if this is your second year of college it's high time to stop bursting into tears if someone laughs at you. Now you're seventeen so I'm taking that into account but baby, if you're on the laid out track of four years, you're half way down the road that ends with the the real world. Baby, the real world laughs harder when you cry because they laughed in the first place. I know it may feel hard but it's time to suck it up and be a big girl.
Part of that is not saying "I hate them now" anymore. No you don't. You still love your father even if you're angry, upset and hurt at this moment.
Wait for a good moment: when he's relaxed and there's nothing on TV and he's not in the middle of anything. You can go to him and say, "Daddy, I've had something on my mind. The other day when such and so happened, I know that you never meant to hurt me - but it hurt my feelings when this and that happened and I don't want there to be any hurt or bad feelings between us. I tried to let it go (try to let it go) but I couldn't so here I am to talk it through." Chances are he'll say how sorry he is and how he never meant to hurt your feelings.
Two: pick which you'd rather have. More responsibility which comes with more freedom - sounds weird but it's true - or to leave things alone and take orders. If you want the freedom of being more grown up then be prepared for the responsibilities that come with being a grown up. Being grown up and being A grown up are not able to be separate: you can't have one without the other. If you want to be grown up you have to accept being A grown up.
If you don't think you can handle both parents at one time, choose which ever parent you have the best repor with and make it known that - you know, since you're two years into college and all - that you'd like to make some steps towards being a grown up. Make it known that you mean no disrespect when your opinions differ from theirs - and for goodness sakes, learn to handle rejection with grace.
You are seventeen. Are they paying for you? And by this I mean do they pay your tuition, housing, bills, clothes, food, fun, etc.? If they pay even a 1/3 of any one of those items then they do get to over rule your vote, let alone half or all of your expenses. You are still their minor child and they have the final say. If they say you can't wear that shirt then you can't wear that shirt - and I don't mean you can if they're not looking. A child who is under 30 and under their parents' authority - and by that I mean their parents are paying the way and providing means of support - doing stuff behind their parents backs is usually a sign of immaturity. If your parents say you can't see that movie or buy that CD or go to that concert or go to that game or...yeah...if they say no and they support you then the answer is no. Now you can say something along the lines of, "I acknowledge your ruling, but I ask to plead my case just a little more." And if you ask that be prepared to say something other than, "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease? Pretty, pretty please with sugar and whipped cream and hot fudge and a maraschino cherry on top!?" But baby, if the answer is no then the answer is no and accepting that answer shows maturity and responsibility.
And know this and know this well: there are two thing that you can do to shut down your parents' mercy quicker than you can blink. 1) disobey. 2) throw a fit and/or whine. If you do either or both of those things they have to make a stand agianst you to make a point and discipline you. I don't care if they're in the wrong - short of illegal and/or harmful activity your answer to your parents is Yes Ma'am or yes Sir. That's how you get their trust. Once you have their trust they give your their respect. And once you have their respect they bless you with this unimaginable amount of freedom. Be worthy of it.
2007-10-26 00:06:34 · answer #1 · answered by ciarakelley87 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Congrats Ben!! How some distance alongside is she? (: i became going to assert Father and Son, dammit. BQ: Breathe in the Air - pink Floyd BQ2: i'm gonna see if i will end this portray for him via Sunday. My kinfolk isn't that sizeable on Father's Day, nonetheless. Edit: Haha, that is thrilling. you will make an excellent dad, i'm valuable :D
2016-11-09 12:27:00 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ma réponses a ta question sérail est impossible de répondre a des question famille si tu ne parle pas anglais dommage
2007-10-25 23:50:58 · answer #3 · answered by patrick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how do we know who won the debate?
You gave no details.
2007-10-26 00:30:15 · answer #4 · answered by Joe F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋