My b/f has a 2month old son how should i feel about this?

Question

im 15 hes 19 and hes got a 2month old son. Now b4 you starting thinking well ur too young, the girl he had the baby with was my age 15. Im glad hes got a son kinder i just dont like the fact that its with another girl. is it normal to have these mixed feelings. i no that him being a father and all comes first and i respect that but he moved away from his son 7 hours away to be exact. i love him alot and want to be with him but when ever i think about him i think of his son is this just a stage im going through or wat coz i dont want to drop him for having a son awwww man if any of this made sence please help.

Answer 1

There are some things that you need to think seriously about.

#1 Is he supporting his son, or is he a deadbeat dad?

#2 Are you having unprotected sex with him, and could end up pregnant too?

#3 If his child is only 2 months old, then you just may be his rebound relationship. Be careful, and don't let him capture your heart too soon.

#4 If he visits his son, how will you know that he is not sleeping with the mother? It happens all of the time.

#5 What in the world would a 19 year old man want with a 15 years old girl? Sex!

Think about all of this and hopefully you will not let yourself get pulled into a relationship that will take away the best years of your life. If he was a good man, he would be trying to work out the relationship between him and his child's mother, right now, not trying to seduce another 15 year old girl.

He is a jerk, take my word for it. I've seen them a hundred of times. They just keep having children with little girls and move on. The poor little girls are left to care for the children alone.

You deserve better than him!!

Answer 2

Honestly, you're way too young to be thinking about children and being with a guy who is old enough to be a father. And you said that he moved away from his child, "7 hours to be exact", well why did he? Is he not wanting to raise that child or is there another reason. You should tell him to go raise his child and when you guys are older you guys can get together again and think about what you guys really want. The first year of a child's development is so crucial that he should really be there for his kid. And if he moved away because he is running away from his responsibilities then you should be careful you should know better than to make the same mistake as that other girl.

Answer 3

First of all I think you're way to young to be responsible for someone else is life-especially a baby. I mean really what would a grown man want with a 15 year old other then sex? He probably still acts like a child himself, convinced his 15 year old girlfriend to have unprotected sex with him, thinking he'd pull out in time. Reassuring her that if she does get pregnant he'll be there for her, and boom what do you know 9 months later congratulations your a dad. What a suprise, now he doesn't want anything to do with her, because no dude wants a child at that age. Aside from that just because the chick he got pregnant was also 15 like you doesn't make it right-doesn't make you an adult either your still way to young. Second, yes it is very common for people have mixed feelings toward their boyfriend or girlfriend's ex-especially if they've got children together. You may get over that, you may not-depends on what kind of a relationship you establish with your boyfriends ex-a good one or bad one. It could help out later on down the road if you established a good relationship to help one another should either one of you need it-she may be able to trust you more to make some decisions in her son's life if it comes down to it-but from what you said his father moved further away, 7 hours to be exact sounds as though he really doesn't see his son that much because he choses not to-possibly only supporting his son financially if that. Which one is it? Because if he's not taking care of him financially & choosing not to see him he may do the same to you if he gets you pregnant. Just remember this child didn't ask to be born, its not his fault so don't treat him like it is-he's the innocent one in all of this and when it comes down to it if he grows up in an unstable family setting he's going to be the one who gets hurt the most. I hope that you make the right choice and listen to what a lot of these people have said in offering you free advice, good luck.

Answer 4

You set up so many red flags to me, I don't hardly know where to start.

#1 you are jail bait to him and he could go to jail for both of you, not just you.

#2 Do NOT think that if you get pregnant he will stay with you and forget the other and the baby, it won't happen.

#3, that baby has his blood, you should be able to look at that innocent baby and just melt, but you are very young and need to mature more to understand all of this.

Jealousy is a terrible emotion but even worse is being that "wicked step-mom" personality just because it reminds you that he slept with another.

You just look past, the past, and love the child like it was yours.

In your case, I would say, run, don't walk, and get away from him as he is not a very responsible person and could do this to you too!

Answer 5

Your lucky your not my daughter cause I would never let you date this stupid kid I would have boot his butt all the way home, you are to young for him and I don't think you want to waste your childhood mothering his kid and missing out on your own childhood, he has a kid at 19 ? where is his parents and do they know about his kid and the mother only being 15 if I was the parent of the girl who had his baby let me tell you, that boy would be one hurting boy. For your best interest you should stay away from him he is a stupid and lacks maturity, you might not like my answer now but when your older you will thank me later.

Answer 6

Well, on one hand he had sex with an underage girl, but I am at least glad that he was responsible enough to stick around for his son and not bail out. It's normal to feel this way as you are both rather young and what it all comes down to is how you feel about the situation. How do you feel about him and his son and do you feel you could have a relationship despite these "obstacles"?

Answer 7

wow thats a lot of responsibility for the poor guy. well i have two answers for you.

If he is close to his son, and talks to him often and visits him, and cares for him like his own child then yes it should be ok for you two to be together. Its also ok to have these mixed feelings for him. Also you should get to meet him.

Now if this guy doesnt care at all for his son and never speaks to him and doesnt give a living hell for the poor kid then no its not a good idea to be with him. Just think one day "if" you marry him and he has a baby with you then how will he treat the baby.

Its a lot for you and him to take in.
I think the way he reacts to a child 7 hours away will just let you know on how he'll care for you and your family "one day."
You should also try speaking with him about him and his son and his ex. It'll help trust me.

Answer 8

Jeez, you are only 15. There is no need for you to get involved with an adult man, much less someone who already has a son. You have plenty of time to grow up! Don't rush it.

Answer 9

You are way tooo young to be thinking about love and men and kids.
You especially want nothing to do with him. Is he supporting this child? If not, chances are really good that when he knocks you up and runs off, he wont support yours either.

Use your head.

Answer 10

you're much too young to understand your boyfriend 's predicament.. you should not even feel bad about it knowing that he is a responsible guy for acknowledging and taking the responsiblity of of his kid.
what you are probably feeling right now is jealousy. You want your boyfriend's undivided attention.