i don't know what to do anymore, i feel so incredibly fed up. i realize i'm not his parent, but his sister, so who am i for him to answer to, right?
my parents though don't know about any of the things he does. he is not a bad person, but he just doesn't care about school--high school. he is soo concerned about his appearance, constantly having a gf, being popular, and every aspect of his social life. he stays after school everyday to hang out even more with his friends...then he comes home and goes on aim to talk even more with his friends. i've talked with his teachers and they tell me that he's doing poorly in his classes. i've tried to talk to him so many times, tried to explain to him in different ways how important it is for him to do well in school. he hears me, but it's in one ear and out the other. before i used to control what he does on the internet by blocking aim and blog sites, and only let him do that on the weekends, then he found other ways to get around
2007-10-25 15:50:51 · 7 answers · asked by smiles 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
so then i just stopped blocking it and just letting him do whatever, make his own decisions and learn from it. when i try to give him advice, he just yells back at me and continues to sit there and waste time. i'm more that willing to help him and have gone to whatever ends to help him with school. i hate to watch him sit there and ruin his life, but nothing i'm doing to help is getting through to him. it hurts that he doesn't care and is being so ignorant
2007-10-25 15:56:05 · update #1
my parents both work when my brother comes home so they trust me to discipline and watch him. they know about how he is and try to lecture him but he doesn't listen.....out of everyone he probably listens the most (if anything) to me, but what i'm telling him doesn't seem enough.
2007-10-25 16:03:50 · update #2
You need to leave your brother alone, and focus on your own future and problems, hon. I see you are concerned, but you can't control others. And it's not your place to talk to your brother's teachers or discipline him -- that's what parents are for.
You can talk with your parents and let them know what you've observed. let them take it from there.
Your brother might have some difficulty studying, or a slight learning disablity, or just plain doesn't care about school grades. Fortunately, he will still be able to get into a college, if he decides to go later (not Harvard, of course). He can still have a future... maybe he just needs to grow through this current phase, and let reality set in.
Do your best in school and set goals and make good plans for your future. After all, yours is the only future you can control.
take care.
2007-10-25 16:00:29 · answer #1 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My brother had issues in school and we now believe that he may have had a learning disability. He dropped out of college at 19 and now that he's 29, he is ready to go back. School work and studying does not come easy to everybody and sometimes they need more time to make the step into furthering their education. Maybe high school is his ultimate ending point. Who knows. Just because you have a college degree does not mean you'll be successful and just because you don't have one, does not mean you will be a failure. I have a degree in business. My collegue never got her degree but started at an entry level position with my company and worked her way up through the ranks. Now she and I are equals. I've been with my company for 5 years and it took me a year to move up to my current position. She's been with the company for 9 years and it took her 8 years to move up to her current position so there is a disparity there but because of her tenure and all of the raises she got throughout the years, she still makes more than me.
2007-10-26 00:43:17 · answer #2 · answered by CAITLIN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not your job to discipline him...period. You try to, and all you'll do is create a feeling of resentment in him towards you.
Talk to your parents, and then simply concentrate on yourself and your studies. Let your parents be the parent, and you be a sister. You are way out of line talking to his teachers, and they shouldn't even be talking to you about his studies, they should talk with your parents, and I'm surprized they haven't told you so. You also have no right to block his internet use, again, that's your parents job.
And, take it from a parent, we know more about what our kids do that you guys think we do.
2007-10-25 22:58:00 · answer #3 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you're taking on what your parents should be taking on! They are the authority figures in his life, they are the only ones who can lay the law down on him if needs be. I think you're trying to handle something that a parent should be dealing w/instead. You wouldn't be "telling on him", you'd be "helping" him...You can't change him, only he can change himself. But your parents w/have more control than you could ever hope to have. Hey, at least you care about him!
2007-10-25 23:08:18 · answer #4 · answered by Sue C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to back off and leave your brother alone. you are his sister not his parent. are you older or younger? He is in high school and needs to take charge of his own life. so back off and let him deal with the problems he will have with the bad grades.
2007-10-25 22:56:47 · answer #5 · answered by brianswife 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
where are the real parents in this situation? if they're available, let them know, it's important that they do know about these sort of things.. and if they arent there.. then why dont you talk to his teachers, or.. set up a time to study with him or something.
2007-10-25 22:57:16 · answer #6 · answered by Jazmen 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
take im out in the back lawn and give him a nice long swaety talking to about his behavior and then bang him.
ok
2007-10-25 22:56:28 · answer #7 · answered by shea 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋