hi everyone .
my problem is my boyfriend and i are having some money issue. we are moving on the 1st of nov. plus have a toddler .
for christmas we both have alot of familey but not enough money to spend on everyone.
so i was thinking of having picture done of our son and putting them into nice but low price frames and giving them to our family.
bigger pictures to the grandparents then a smaller size to our siblings then like our aunts uncles and/ or cousins wallet sizes.
then for nices and nephew giving like 5 in a card.
but in return asking our famileys not to give us anything and to focus instead on our son. is it rude to do this
i just feel bad reciving a gift when we can't aford to give alot ths year.
so i was wonder if anyone has any good ideas that might go nice with the picture or any other present ideas.
thanks
2007-10-25 14:53:35 · 18 answers · asked by ~*big mama *~ 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
What we do for Christmas is to simply buy for the children. For the grown adults we are just proud as we can be to be together for another celebration of God and family. So no... Do not think of yourselves as cheap... Think of it as intelligent... Tis the season of giving... giving what? Presents? Love? Or something someone needs?
God bless you and Merry early Christmas!!!
Because of you life is good!!!
2007-10-25 15:17:27 · answer #1 · answered by Treslayr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your idea is wonderful, and not rude at all. Last year, I received the most precious gift: an 8 x 10 framed photo of my oldest grandson (I hope I get one of his younger brother this year!) The photo is proudly displayed on the table in the foyer of my home. I cannot tell you what else I got that year, because that was (still is!) my favorite gift.
My husband and I have got large families, too, and it just got too hard to get presents for everyone -- even the kids! We all just bring one gift (with a $15.00 limit), draw numbers, and go down the line: #1 goes first, gets a gift, #2 can either pick a gift or take away #1's gift, then #1 gets to pick another gift, #3 can do the same as #2, and we continue until all the gifts are opened. It is a lot of fun, and those who don't bring a gift, don't participate -- but they have a great time watching the others fight over the best presents!
I know, it probably seems real easy for most of us on here to advise you to not feel bad being unable to exchange gifts with your family -- but believe me when I tell you that most of us (if not all!) have been in the same situation you are in, and through the years have realized that giving gifts is not what the holiday season is all about. It is about being with family, enjoying family, creating memories, and building relationships. The older you get, the more you will understand.
2007-10-25 22:48:33 · answer #2 · answered by tracy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a WONDERFUL gift idea, and something that will still be around when all the fruitcakes have mummified and the toys are long forgotten. Frames also last forever and can be re-cycled when the picture is moved into an album. Very good idea! Do NOT apologize, thinking of everyone in this way is wonderful.
Additional: When I was about 45, my Mom was in her early 70s, I told her well before Christmas that I knew what I wanted that year....she hesitated, and asked, "another Cadillac", and I said no...."I want a professional picture of YOU". She always hated pictures being taken, and responded, "I wished you'd asked for the Cadillac." BUT she did go to Sears, had the pictures taken, and WE ALL got pictures that year. We loved him, and still do. I have an 8x10 still on my wall. She has been gone since 1997, at age 82, but we have pictures of her healthy, happy and in a nice flowered dress. WOW, better than a Cadillac that would be in a junk yard now.
2007-10-25 22:14:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is not rude to spend money that you do not have. I would just tell everyone that you cannot afford gift giving this year and let it go at that. Giving everyone pictures of your child is a nice idea. I can't believe that people still buy gifts for the entire extended family. We buy for our children and our parents and that is it. We used to buy for the nieces and nephews until there were too many of them. Christmas is not about buying gifts and going into debt. Celebrating and spending time with your family should be enough. Maybe you should suggest that it is slimmed down. Others might also agree and are just afraid to say something.
2007-10-26 08:37:39 · answer #4 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got the right idea - consider making that photo a "family portrait" - you, boyfriend, and son. That many frames ... even inexpensive ones ... could get costly, though, especially if you have to mail any of them. If you go that route, though, consider just tucking one into a Christmas card and sending everyone a card.
The guy with the "name exchange" idea has another excellent idea, but I would narrow it to where every relative has only ONE name, not an entire family, to buy for.
Most people have a finite amount of money these days, so don't even trip about it. If anyone has a problem because you're low on dough, they'd have to be pretty crass to even hint that they're perturbed by it. A nice family photo and a card should be enough for ANYONE.
2007-10-25 22:27:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that is rude at all. I did the same thing before. Family should understand these situations. Especially since you have told them to just concentrate on your child. It's not what Christmas is about anyway. The only year my husband and I had enough money to get both our girls and family really nice gifts I thought this will be the best Christmas EVER. Well my daughters walked in to the full room of presents from Santa and our phone rang. It was my mom telling me they had just found my favorite aunt (like a second mother) dead. It really puts things in perspective. Family, Love, Jesus that's what its about. This year we are financially worse than we have ever been I haven't been able to work since December trying to get disability and my husband is on disability so we are a family of four living on a little monthly check. So I went to orientaltrading.com and bought these little cross bookmarks I got 24 for 10 dollars I'm going to make them and give them out. Best of luck to you and I hope you have a blessed Christmas.
2007-10-25 22:21:19 · answer #6 · answered by RENEE M 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you can't get blood out of a turnip. No it's not rude. I think your wise to live within your means and be honest about how much you can afford to spend for Christmas. And besides, the true meaning of Christmas is to celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ... not spending a lot of money on gifts we can't afford for family members just because of pride. I think you're idea is great. And by the way, The Salvation Army and Goodwill industries thrift stores often have inexpensive items in mint condition that you could give as gifts. Or the Dollar Stores. Don't stress out over it. A lot of people are in your position.
2007-10-25 22:09:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Nothing is a rude gift as long as you are giving something of yourself. If the pictures are the best you can do it's what you do. But you can't ask your families not to give you anything. They will do what they want and as much as they want. It is their choice. Gift giving is an option and people can give what they want. Just because you don't have the money doesn't mean others don't. Accept their gifts and say thank you. You can't ask them to adjust their gift giving to your lack of money. It isn't right. So do what you can afford and let others do what they can afford.
2007-10-25 22:31:40 · answer #8 · answered by dawnb 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think its nice but heres an easier idea people do in large families.... be honest and ask if you can do name trades and then you each can buy one family gifts and that helps everyone out and alot of families do it.. kinda like secret santas. Also getting pics taken and buying frames is expensive even when done low cost... also some people may like the pic but be disappointed its considered a gift.
2007-10-25 22:12:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your family would much rather you get your finances together than send them some gift they don't really need or want. Your idea is wonderful and more than you have to do. Christmas is all about enjoying life and the people around you. That has nothing to do with all these expensive do-hickeys.
2007-10-25 22:25:27 · answer #10 · answered by that dead girl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋