My grandma has alzheimers!?

Question

My grandmas been in a nursing home for a couple years now.She didnt ever want to be in a nursing home and we promised her wed never put her into one.My grandpa died in 1998 and my Grandma slowly lost her mind after losing him.We had to put her into a home because she was walking around in a bad neighborhood at 3 am every night giving her money to strangers and knocking on peoples doors calling the police and pulling knives on people.We lied to her and told her she was in a hospital.She knows who she is but thinks shes still 25 years old.Im 27 and she has 16 other grandkids that she doesnt even know.My Grandma was like a mother to me but now she has no idea who I am.No clue.My question is how can I make her remember me?I went through this with my great grandma too but it wasnt the same because my grandma pretty much raised me and now she doesnt know me.What can I do to make her remember me again?

Answer 1

Thats so sad, im sorry, I know what thats like, there isnt much you can do but perhaps wear certain perfumes and wear bright colors that way when you come over they can try to remember those special things, and scent is tied strongly to memory, you just have to make the connection to her

Answer 2

I am so sorry to hear about your grandma. I worked in 2 different nursing homes for over a year and it is very hard to deal with alzheimers patients. Although none of my relatives have/had alzheimers, I know how you feel. Honestly, there is not a cure to alzheimers. Most people will remember things from a very long time ago if they have alzheimers. They will think they are still 40 and married, while they are 80 and their spouse died 10 years ago. I have had patients walking around crying because they can't find their family. Or a patient's family member comes to visit them and they have no idea who this person is that is coming to see them. And to tell you the truth, she may never remember who you are. Maybe you could try helping her remember you. See if she remembers some of the things you used to do with her when you were younger. Or wear certain perfumes or fragrances that she might remember. You could even bring in some of her favorite things of the past (if you/she still has stuff). If she still doesn't remember you, everytime you see her just explain who you are, and enjoy the time that you have with her now. Don't give up, I know there's a cure out there somewhere for this. Once again I am sorry to hear about your grandma and good luck. I will be praying for you and her.

Answer 3

I am so sorry. My mother-in-law has Alzheimers and sometimes she will have moments of clarity and know my husband (her son) and sometimes she doesn't. I know that if she lives long enough she probably won't know any of us. Alzheimers is a terrible, terrible disorder. It takes away our loved ones so long before they are actually gone. Don't feel bad about putting her in a nursing home. You love her and you have to do what is best for her. I always advise anyone to never promise to not put their parent in a home. You have no idea what you will have to do before you die. Alzheimer patients reach a point where they need 24/7 care to be safe and most people can not do that financially or phisically. I would recommend a book to you called "The 36 Hour Day". It will help anyone dealing with this. You may not be able to get her to remember you but she will still enjoy your visits. This will be hard I know. Hugs.

Answer 4

Darling, you can't make her remember who you are. I am so sorry. Before my mother died, she knew me only as my father's sister (whom I do resemble), although some days she would call me "Valeria", who is my first cousin. Yet I do not believe she recognized me as those people even then; I think those were the names that just came to her mind. You might try showing her old photos, since they say long term memory still has shreds intact. However, my daughter tried this with my Mom, and every single picture she looked at, she said was a sheriff's deputy who lived down the street from us. The mind forgets, but the senses remember. Hold her hand when you talk to her. She will recognize the touch, if she recognizes nothing else. Bless you.

Answer 5

I am sorry hun, but there is really nothing you can do. I worked at a nursing home for about 4 years in the alzheimers unit. We had a 107 yr old woman who would cry at night for her momma. Usually they just get worse. Some alzhiemers patients do have "good days" where they do remember their family better than other days. Unless they have came out with some type of medicine since I left, I don't really know that there is anything that can be done. Sorry about your grandma, just enjoy all the time you have with her now.

Answer 6

I'm so sorry. I watched my grandmother die from this, and it's one of the most painful things in the world to watch. Even worse, there is nothing you can do to help her remember you. Her mind is getting smaller (literally) and dying. The capacity for memory of that type probably isn't there anymore. They have 'pockets' of memory where they seem lucid, then they mistake you for someone else or have no clue who you are.

Too painful to talk about anymore, but I know what you are going through. Anyone who hasn't been there has no idea. Again, i'm so sorry.

Answer 7

Well, I had a doctor tell me that people with Alzheimers do not think about the bath, but just the fact that you are trying to get their clothing off them. Some of them just take them off and take more showers than are necessary. I know people who have it, and I worked for doctors who worked with geriatric patients. It is a very hard situation. Maybe you need to just tell her she is going to bathe and make her do it, because otherwise, she will never bathe. Maybe you could put decaffeinated tea in her whiskey bottle instead of straight whiskey.

Answer 8

Sadly, there is no real treatment for this affliction of the mind. My own grandmother has this...illness, and I grew up around her. I love my grandmother, and she passed quite a bit of valuable knowledge onto me. The only thing you can do is visit her as often as your schedule permits. Remeber her as she was. Your grandmother lived life for quite a few number of years with her mind intact, that is what is important. It is sad to see her like this I know. I am sad when I think of my grandmother, but she is almost eighty. She raised three children, and had a full life. Her diminshed capacity is unfortunate, but I do smile when I think of the summers at Grandma's place. Drinking lemonade and playing games with her. The memory of her before this affliction always makes me smile. Hug your Grandmother as much as you can before she passes.

Answer 9

My grandma had Alzheimer's too and she stopped remembering me at a certain point. There's really not much you can do to help her remember, but my Mom did something that I thought was neat. She created a collage of photographs of members of our family and put the names under each photo, so my grandma could see the names and associate them with pictures. Just a thought. It could help.

Answer 10

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but depending upon what stage Alzheimers she has entered, if she doesn't remember you, even showing her pictures isn't going to spark a second of recognition. Unfortunately this disease is one that is more devistating to the victims loved ones than to the victim herself. We also have Alzheimers in our family - Mom and lost my Mother in Law to it also. It is terribly difficult to watch beautiful people who had great minds, waste away with their thinking. There are support groups in almost every community these days for this devastating disease, I hope you will contact your local Alzheimers Association for the phone numbers. Good Luck and God Bless