Here's a joke that someone emailed to me some years ago...
A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience.
Seeing God, she asked "Is my time up?"
God said, "No, you have another 40 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a facelift, liposuction, and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair colour. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded,
"I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?"
God replied, "I didn't recognise you."
2007-10-25 11:04:52 · 7 answers · asked by Blue-♥-Berry 6 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
LOL!!! here's one for u
Internal Revenue Service
I can't think of anything more appropriate at this time of the year, April Fool's Day, (the real one April 15th)
The Internal Revenue sends their auditor (a nasty little man) to audit a synagogue.
The auditor is doing all the checks, and then turns to the Rabbi and says, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."
"Yes," answered the Rabbi.
"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.
"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up. When we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker.
And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."
"Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his question actually had a practical answer.
So he thought he'd try another question, in his obnoxious way...
"Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do... with the crumbs from the matzo?"
"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up the crumbs, then we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."
"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins
from the circumcisions? "
"Yes, here too, we do not waste, "answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins. And when we have enough we actually send them to the Internal Revenue Service."
"Internal Revenue Service?, "questioned the auditor in disbelief.
"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi, "Internal Revenue Service. And about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."
2007-10-26 01:36:54 · answer #1 · answered by kinky_dreads 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha! Funny! 10!
2007-10-25 19:28:39 · answer #2 · answered by cats 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Better than the last one i read, that's for sure.
2007-10-25 18:30:26 · answer #3 · answered by kelstar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats a cute joke! i like it, gotta tell somebody!
2007-10-25 18:17:16 · answer #4 · answered by ~JoJo~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats a good one
2007-10-25 18:36:46 · answer #5 · answered by Frizz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha, that's what ya get!
2007-10-25 19:37:18 · answer #6 · answered by Mako 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol...its an alright joke
2007-10-25 18:09:08 · answer #7 · answered by . 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋