2007-10-25 09:50:26 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Community Service
Usually no, as they automatically put the other person in a defensive position, making them more likely to rebel against your ultimatum. Sometimes they are necessary though, like in very serious situations where someone could get hurt, etc.
Like the other lady said, try compromise first.
2007-10-25 09:55:57 · answer #1 · answered by aml0017 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I say no, if you are talking about using an ultimatum in a relationship. They usually backfire.
For example, Say you are tell someone to commit to you or your going to leave. What will usually happen is that person will say okay, lets be committed. They will probably even try it for a while but it wont last. They may even begin to lie to you and know you've just created a trust issues. A person has to make certain decision on there own when they are ready. Giving a ultimatum usually causes friction and animosity. Try talking with the person to see what they want. If its now what you want let them know what you had in mind and see if you can come to a happy medium.
2007-10-25 17:40:08 · answer #2 · answered by mandy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They often only represent an escalation of a power-struggle, and if you destroy the person's "inner king" (ref: Robert Bly), they may self-destruct, or spin out of control and ignore the ultimatum.
Generally, ultimatums are a bad idea, particularly when dealing with children. It's much better to discuss the issues with them, and use the broken record technique if necessary to get the point across of WHY a specific thing is needed.
And don't forget to choose your battles wisely!
2007-10-25 16:59:53 · answer #3 · answered by HyperDog 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were you, I would avoid using ultimatums. It's like fighting with a guy and punching him in the jewels. It's a cheap move, and later you could end up feeling badly about doing that to somebody.
Negotiation is always the best course of action. Good luck :)
2007-10-25 16:57:08 · answer #4 · answered by ♥ Blonde&Intelligent 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
depends, if the person really screwed up and knows it, a ultimatum can scare them straight. If you use a ultimatum to just try to force someone to do something with no reason, probably won't work.
2007-10-25 16:53:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give me an ultimatum and I will throw it in your face. It never works.
2007-10-25 16:54:12 · answer #6 · answered by futuretopgun101 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe for kids, but if you give an adult an ultimatum, I think they do the opposite.
2007-10-25 16:53:24 · answer #7 · answered by Harley Lady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope
2007-10-25 16:52:49 · answer #8 · answered by greatgurl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It really depends on the situation. If you set one then you have to be prepared to face the consequences. You should always leave an open door, for a solution to be reached.
Good Luck.
2007-10-25 16:54:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps in the short term, but even then it's iffy. Always better to work it out so everyone can be happy.
2007-10-25 16:55:56 · answer #10 · answered by bettyrubleinspurs 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋