So my ex-boyfriend wants to see my baby after it is born but because i live with my parents they don't want him to come over to this house because he and his mom treated us bad when we went over to tell them the good news. Well I don't mind him coming over but what can he do? Can he go to court and force my parents to let him in the house so that he can see the baby? I mean I would say yes but this isn't my house. And me and my ex don't really get along. i don't want the baby moving back and forth every few days and I can't move out at the present time. What are his options? or mine?
2007-10-25 06:56:48 · 15 answers · asked by That Person 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
meet somewhere so he can see the baby, and even if you dont get along, be civil for the childs sake.
2007-10-25 07:00:03 · answer #1 · answered by Kelly 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He can go to court and obtain an order of visitation, after there is a paternity test proving he is the father (not that you don't know that already! Just that it is a requirement of the courts if you are unwed). The courts can not FORCE your parents to allow him in their home however. He will have to make arrangements to see the baby in a neutral setting, that is agreeable to you both. You have the option to bid for joint custody and develop a parenting plan and visitation schedule, which also gives YOU the say so in where and when he or anyone that he would be with can see the baby. going through the courts will also establish child support and who the child is to reside with. It is probably in your best interest to get an attorney, or ask your parents to help in hiring one. This way EVERYONE'S interest is taken in to account, including the baby!!
2007-10-25 14:02:53 · answer #2 · answered by Austins Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seem like such a sweet heart to worry about this. You say that your boyfriend as well as his mother both treated you bad when you went to tell them about the baby and you care about how and where he's gonna see the baby? Ok first things first, there's no law in the books that going to make your parents open there home to him. Secondly your baby has been a baby from the moment of conception and he hasnt started off right. Treating you bad during your pregnancy when all you did was make an announcement sounds like he's a "great" guy. Now I understand you not wanting to keep your baby away from it's father but let him worry about that. Will he be at the hospital? If so he'll se the baby there. Its about to get cold now if it isnt already cold where you are . The baby cant go back and forth. Tell him to appologize to your parents for actining like an idiot. If they accept his appology then maybe he'll be allowed to visit if not hey its not your fault and neither is the fact that he's not welcomed at your parents home. He can file for shared custody, but what are the chances of that happening? Has he done anything for you during your pregnancy such as take you to your appointments , bought you things you were craving, anything? I wouldnt worry about him. If he lives at home with mom either he's young or irresponsible . If he's irresponsible he wont bother taking you to court unless mom is behind it and is that realistic if she's taking care of him? Would she really shell out more money to take care of his child too. Please dont worry about this. Im sure it seems like a big deal but its reallly not.
2007-10-25 14:18:03 · answer #3 · answered by that hot chick 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Document on paper how they 'treated you badly' and keep a record of anything he or his family say that they shouldn't.
If you have to go to court to get custody, you need this record.
Talk to an attorney.
It doesn't sound to me as if he's actually interested in the baby. I would go with your parents. Cut off any contact with him.
Yes, he can try to force you to allow visitation. If he's paying child support. Does he have the resources to do that? The money for child support and for an attorney?
I believe in fathers rights. But not if the father didn't react well to being told he was going to be one.
At the same time, the genes your baby inheirited from it's father are not just the rotten ones. :)
Write down some things about the babies father or his famlly if you know any nice things, as your baby will want to know someday.
2007-10-25 14:06:38 · answer #4 · answered by pansyblue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He definitely can take you to court for rights to see the child, but he would also have to prove that he is paying child support or helping you take care of the child.
But your parents need to realize that he IS the father and no matter how they feel, they really can't stop him from seeing his child. They should be happy that he wants to have a part in the babies life because so many men get the women pregnant and then leave. Just make sure that if he is going to see him, he helps pay for the expenses that come along with it. He shouldn't be able to just come and go as he pleases, there need to be guidelines.
2007-10-25 14:01:56 · answer #5 · answered by Paula Christine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, as soon as this baby is born, go and get legal custody and set up child support. The court can not force your parents to let him in, but he is the father and for the babies sake you all need a way to get along. You can meet at a mall or resturant or any public place and let him see his child. He could also go to court and ask for joint custody too, so do it first,
2007-10-25 14:02:55 · answer #6 · answered by just me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is his child he has every right to see the baby. There is no reason at all he has to come to the house for this to happen. Your best off getting a parenting plan through the courts
2007-10-25 14:01:29 · answer #7 · answered by TD R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Meet somewhere in public like a park to give him some visitation.
Honesly, he could take you to court for visitation, but do you really want to go through that. You're better of trying to work something out between the two of you so he can see your child. He is the child's father, and legally that gives him the right to see his child. You made a baby together, that's how it works, and now, no matter how much you don't like him in general, the two of you will be connected in that way forever so you better get used to it now.
2007-10-25 15:11:58 · answer #8 · answered by Marra's mommy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you and your ex need to sit down like adults and discuss your current situation. One simple solution if your parents won't allow him in, is to meet on neutral grounds. Take your baby for a walk each day together. Once you grow more comfortable with the fact that you are BOTH the babys parents, and should share responsibility, talk more about how you would both like to raise your child, even if you are separated.
Keep in mind the who time, that this is bigger than either of you. Everything you do, you should consider your childs mental health and happiness. Never fight infront of him/her, save that for adult time only.
2007-10-25 14:03:01 · answer #9 · answered by Amy M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He can go to court if he likes to try and make your parent's see him. This would be good for you too in the long run with child support and all. You really should respect your parent's wishes since it is their house. If you really want him to see the baby then you should do it outside of your parents' home.
2007-10-25 14:00:45 · answer #10 · answered by sd_mex_chic 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Why do people get into mess's like this!?
A father has the right to see his own child, and he could get a lawyer and set up visitation rights if you won't concede to this particular request.
Why dont' you just ask your folks to leave for an hour so they don't have to look at him or him them.. ? I am sure the novelty will wear off once you ask him for child support.
2007-10-25 14:01:21 · answer #11 · answered by Tapestry6 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋