I'd like to think there is more to it than my husband just being selfish, but we never get to go anywhere just to be alone... dinner, movies, to the park... nada! He says it's enough just for me to be at home with him... But it's not enough for me, and I've told him that several times! He just still doesn't get it. I feel like dropping it because now, if he does take me out, or makes a special effort for us to be alone, I'll feel like he doesn't really want to do it, but is just humoring me!!! Help!
2007-10-25 03:49:31 · 5 answers · asked by quietlycrazy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I might add that we've been married less than 2 months, and have 4 kids all together. One lives with us full time, and the other 3 are teenages and live with their other parent, and visit us on weekends. So, we can't just spontaneously go on a date... we have to plan ahead!
2007-10-25 03:50:44 · update #1
I just sent my husband and email and asked if he wants to go to a concert with me in a couple of weeks. I usually ask if "we" can go, but this time, I posed the question differently. I'm giving him the option for us to go together, or I can go alone. Now, we'll see what happens!
Thanks for the advice :-)
2007-10-25 04:49:10 · update #2
Sounds like the romance is completely gone from your marriage.
2007-10-25 03:53:08 · answer #1 · answered by thistlesnshamrocks 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋
This issue is going to do nothing but get worse unless you two can find some middle ground here. Seems a shame to suggest counseling after only a few months of marriage but you and he are not on the same page and right now it's either you don't get your needs (to go out with him alone) fulfilled, or he goes out but you feel it's out of obligation and not desire, thus you won't enjoy that time together.
Get this addressed asap or truly accept that it's not necessary to go out alone...otherwise it'll snowball into resentment and an issue that won't be easy to resolve down the road.
Good luck!
2007-10-25 03:53:51 · answer #2 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Instead of waiting for someone to do "something" for you that would now lose it's meaning, try taking charge of what it is you want! You set the date up... You decide where you want to go & how you want it to be. Send him a very sexy alluring invitation via email or text msg & give him subtle hints as to what will be taking place...
My idea of getting what I want is going after it instead of waiting for someone to read my mind or have expectations that will lead to let downs!
By the way... he'll love it! And it might just compell him to try to "top" your date & surprise you!!! Never stop giving - cause when you do - you stop "getting!"
2007-10-25 03:57:03 · answer #3 · answered by T. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you marry him then? Obviously, this can't be a new thing in your marriage, you've only been married 2 months. If you didn't like him before, why did you say "I do"? Don't you know that you can't change a man? He is who he is. You either love him for who he is, or you don't marry him.
If you want to go to those places and he doesn't, go by yourself. That will either get his attention, or at least you'll have fun.
2007-10-25 03:53:16 · answer #4 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Then do that plan ahead.....and let him know you are...then if he goes ok..if not go enjoy it yourself......seems that may get the message across..........it takes two to make a marriage work......or it will never succeed............thats a start.........
2007-10-25 03:52:45 · answer #5 · answered by hghostinme 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋