Does it seem that people snub your ring if it isn't GIGANTIC?

Question

I have a 1 ct. tw. marquis setting and it seems that all people are concerned with are HUGE diamond rings--1.5-2 Ct.. now a days.

To me it's the meaning behind the ring...I'm not competing here. Obviously the man I love is marrying me--good enough for me. I just think far too many people are showing off what they have and not focusing on what's really imprtant --a marriage.

Sorry--I had to vent! I noticed people snubbing a girl at work too--she got a nice 1/2 Ct. solitare--what's with society??

One gal said--"awww--it's so tiny it's cute" and the other one said "it's something to build up from"--RUDE!

I'm sooo happy that most people agree that it is the meaning NOT the actual material posession--I mean money can't buy happiness... can it? nOpe! You cannot measure one's love by material gifts no matter how much some tries.

Answer 1

I agree - that' just RUDE. The engagement is about the commitment to get married - not about the ring. Many people are far too interested in material things and in showing off what they have. Anyone who behaves that way needs to grow up.

I've gotten a lot of nasty remarks about the fact that I do not have an actual engagement ring. People assume that because my fiance and I are both successful professionals, I should be wearing a huge stone. Because of my concern about blood diamonds being used to fund conflicts in Africa (where the vast majority of diamonds come from), I opted not to have an engagement ring. Until the wedding, I'm wearing a small gold ring that my fiance's parents gave me when he introduced me to them. It has sentimental value because of where it came from. And...we're perfectly happy with our decision to just wear nice wedding bands.

Anyone who actually cares about what kind of ring someone else is wearing has his/her priorities out of whack.

Answer 2

I couldn't even tell you the carat weight of my ring. If i had to take a guess, I would assume the main stone is .5 (and this was actually a family stone that he had reset) & then there are 2 little diamonds on each side. It's small, but since i have tiny fingers it looks bigger than it really is. I know girls who say they want their ring so big that their hand will be dragging the floor. I would have been very upset with my fiance if he broke the bank to buy me a ring. I mean, how irresponsible is that ?? And marriage is a huge responsibility. Everytime I glance down at my ring I think about how blessed I am to have such an amazing man in my life, and really that's what it's supposed to be about. So basically, Amen, sister!

Answer 3

Where I live, a 1 ct ring is considered to be big. My own ring has a 3/4 ct marquis cut diamond and I got a lot of compliments on it. My maid of honor is actually the only person who said that she didn't like it. Not because of the size of the diamond, but because of the cut. She prefers round and princess cut rings. I value her because of her honesty! I haven't noticed anyone get snubbed because of the size of the diamond in her ring, but most of the people I'm around have rings with anywhere from 1/2 to 1 ct diamonds. I do think that what you are describing is terrible. The MARRIAGE is the important part, not the ring.

Answer 4

I know what you mean. I specifically did not want to get into this kind of competition. My engagement ring is a family heirloom from my fiance's family. It's a 1920s Art Deco style, with three small diamonds across the top band. This kind of helps the competitive thing. It's like people equate the size of the diamond with the amount of love the man has for the woman (so not so). Even my fiance got sucked into that--he told me that I didn't have to use this ring, that he'd buy me one with a bigger diamond, and have the small stones re-set into the new ring. That's a lovely thought, but I don't want a gaudy ring, I feel very attached to the meaning of the heirloom, and I'd think about what else we could have used the money for. This ring is the one I was meant to have. I don't care about the bling factor, and I agree that too many people do (and I don't mean the engaged women necessarily, but their friends and coworkers and families). Good point!

Answer 5

It is funny you know, to me a half carat diamond is BIG. I was married once before and I have no idea what size the diamond was but I would say it was like a .25 or similar. I think having the big diamond is an American thing, because here not many women have rings with a 1 carat diamond.
I dont have a ring yet......We have our date set and I am not sure what my man is waiting for.....we have only 8 months till the wedding. But when I do get a ring, I will be so overjoyed and not because I want a big diamond. I just want a ring on my finger, chosen with love, and chosen because that is the ring he wanted to give me.
Oh another thought too, diamond rings do appear to be a lot cheaper in America. I was looking at a half carat diamond ring with baguette shaped diamonds on each side, quite simple. And it was well over $2000.
Looking on websites for american jewellers, your rings are way better priced. You lucky things!

Answer 6

I agree with what others have said about their own personal taste and proportion. My engagement ring is set in gold with a 1.33 round diamond. Although many don't prefer the traditional style, I love how my ring sparkles. So many people have commented on how lovely it looks especially in certain lighting. It sparkles across the room.

When I first got engaged, I got a wide variety of responses. People said negative things about the gold band, some thought the diamond was too large on my finger while others thought too small, others didn't like the round cut -- the list goes on.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I love my ring and wouldn't change it to a 2 carat princess cut diamond set in platinum so certain people would think it's more fashionable. Who cares what they think anyway? This is what I am happiest with. Anyone who doesn't like it can just get over themselves.

Answer 7

I am proud of you that you realize that engagment or marraige is not about the ring. Some people are rude and do not pratice proper manners.

My ring is small but pretty but it was what my husband could afford. My sister who was jealous because I got engaged said to me after she saw my ring when I get married I am going to get a rock (meaning a bid diamond) I also have been told my ring is delicate and very pretty it is 1/4 carat but my husband was the ONLY man who ever properly asked me to marry him and went to my father for the blessing.

Many people get big rings and get divorced. You have a good head on you shoulders meaning you have a lot of common sense and I applaud you for that and give you credit.

If a ring is too big over a carat some look fake like you got it out of a bubble gum machine and gaudy rings are not pretty rings.

You said it all when you said too many people are showing off what they have and not focusing on whats really important a marraige I have always felt this way. E4G

Answer 8

You can never know why someone acts a certain way in a situation such as this. Perhaps they are insecure or socially awkward and not quite sure the correct thing to say. Even if they do intend to snub you, it shouldn't matter. What matters is what you think of the ring and what your fiance was thinking of when he picked it out. A lot of my friends have very large diamonds and several have Tiffany engagement rings. I always thought that's what I wanted to, but when my fiace and I started looking my eyes were drawn to antique settings. My ring is beautiful. My friends always tell me that it is just what they would picture on my hand. No one says anything about the size, the shape, or anything else. They just say it's very me-- and that's all I can ask for!

Answer 9

I've never personally noticed that. I have noticed that anyone who gets a larger ring is quickly told something like...oh, I'd never want something so large, it would get in the way, or I think large gems are tacky....to my ears it sounds like sour grapes.

My cousin has a tiny ring (maybe .25 carats at most, probably way less), but her hand is tiny and it looks perfect for her. My ring is a size 8-I've got these big hands, and her ring would look terrible on me. My ring suits my hand.

People are naturally going to be wowed by a huge ring--it is impressive-even if it wouldn't suit you, it still is something to see.

Plus...everyone has their own likes and dislikes when it comes to rings--that's why there are thousands of different styles! My ring isn't stylish because it's yellow gold. This is my personal dream ring--I don't need someone else to validate it's beauty--it is gorgeous in my eyes, and I would pick this ring and no other if I had the choice of every ring in the world again. You need to stop worrying about the fuss people do not make over yoru ring, and concern yourself with the fuss yoru fiance makes over YOU. That's what counts! Run your own race-you aren't in competition with anyone else.

Answer 10

No, I totally know what you mean. I love my ring just the way it is-it's about a 3/4 carat total, but the stones are flawless-so despite that it's a bit smaller than other rings, it is worth more and it has a fire that many rings don't have.

But there is such a gigantic cultural obsession with large diamonds on engagement rings. Which is ridiculous. and impractical.
There are so many things about the bridal business that bug the heck out of me....and I'm with you-that's a big one on the list!!

Answer 11

My husband gave me a 1/2 ct. princess cut - and i got the same looks....especially because at that time I worked with a lot of people who had 2+ ct. rings. If i remember correctly they always remarked "It's so simple" - which is what i wanted, i'm not a flashy person.

But my husband went to the store multiple times to pick out the stone, and customize the setting and etc. He didn't just walk into the store and say - "I'll take that one"....so I love my ring, because he put thought into every detail.

Plus by the time I added two eternity bands as my wedding bands - it doesn't look so "simple" anymore.