How can I get my 15 month old to sleep in his own bed in his own room?

Question

I know i sound like a horrible parent, but my son has been sleeping in the bed with me since he was born, mostly because Ive been struggling since Ive had him, but now i have my own place and he has his own room and his own bed. Ive tried to put him in his bed when he has already fallen asleep, but he'll just wake up in the middle of the night screaming. what should i do? HELLLPPPP!

Answer 1

Hello

You're not a horrible parent, just a tired one. I'm a doctor and have seen many parents worn out with babies. You need your sleep too.

It's tough when your baby has slept with you - of course he's going to protest when he's put in a room on his own. But you can teach him to sleep peacefully on his own. It's the Controlled Crying technique and it is tough for a few days but it will work.

Step 1 Decide on a regular time to start the bedtime routine and stick to it. Allow at least one hour for the bath, milk feed and settling. Keep it relaxed so he has plenty of your time and attention.


Step2 Settle your child in his bed. Kiss him goodnight and leave the room.


Step 3 When he wakes up, allow a minimum of five to 10 minutes of crying before returning to reassure him. Reassurance should be kept to the minimum. You can stroke him or say 'ssh-ssh' softly, but resist the urge to pick him up. Leave the room after two minutes even if he continues to cry.


Step 4 After the first half hour of crying, the times between visits should be increased by five to 10 minutes each time, to 15-20 minutes between visits. Yes it sounds horrible, but the idea is to reassure him that you're there but you are NOT going to get him up.


Step 5 Continue with the checking plan every 15-20 mins until your baby or toddler falls asleep. Reassurance should still be kept to a minimum of no more than two minutes and he shouldn't be lifted out of the cot.


Step 6 It's important that you don't give in and take him into your bed or you'll have to start over again from scratch. If he comes into your room, you take his hand and gently take him back to bed without shouting or telling him off or engaging with him at all. Just calmly take him back to bed and settle him.

The technique will take a few days but it will work. If you can, enlist some support from family and friends. And remember kids thrive in a routine - they really do. Once he's settled you'll feel 100% better.

Lots of luck!

Dr Evie Wallace
x

Answer 2

Let him cry it out. Keep the same routine, if you always go in and get him, thats what he's always going to expect, and you'll keep on teaching him that his fear or dislike of being in his bed is well founded and you have to rescue him from it.

Put him in there, let him cry, and he will fall asleep.

So long a you know he's not hurting, and he's not sick or poopy or something, leave him.

Answer 3

My sister has the same problem. I think you should put him to sleep and wait until he or she go's to bed and falls asleep completly and then you can go to bed and just continue with this method until they get usued to it or just tell him "your a big boy and you have to sleep on your own."