Most of them don't even know him and have never met him. They are mad at me for not inviting them. Should I have invited them? Is it wrong for me to feel as though this is for people in the family who actually have known him?
2007-10-25 03:08:41 · 18 answers · asked by Married and loving it!!!! 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Just to make it clear: My family (no relation to my father in law) are making a fuss.
2007-10-25 03:09:56 · update #1
SHould I invite all of them? Some of them my husband and mother in law dont even like. How do I go about doing this?????????????????????????
2007-10-25 03:13:45 · update #2
I am assuming that they think is like a wedding and they need an invite. They are pissed that I never gave them one but I really thought this was for people who actually have known him. I guess I was wrong. I thought it was supposed to be personal.
2007-10-25 03:18:42 · update #3
To John -G
I have close contact with all my family. I love them all very much but my husbands family doesnt like them. They think weird things and have said hurtful stuff to my husbands family. You know nothing about me so dont judge me or my family. How dare you after what my family is going through to talk to me like that. Common Sense tells me you have none.
2007-10-25 04:39:23 · update #4
Most funerals, in my experience, don't require an invitation. An announcement is made with the service details, and those who wish to pay their respects do so. I have had friends accompany me to a service even though they didn't know the person just to offer moral support. If you made it clear that it is a private service but the insist on going, just let it go. If they carry their anger over to the funeral and are disrespectful there, wait until it's over and tell them your concerns. It's not a place for bickering. I'm sorry for your loss :-(
2007-10-25 03:18:50 · answer #1 · answered by sleep_all_day27 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your family should want to come to support you and your husband in your time of sorrow and show sympathy and share condolences with the deceased's family - that is what a funeral is for. I'm sure your father has attended funerals in the past - after all they are a part of life - so give them some credit for wanting to be there to show love and support for you all. For a funeral no invitations are issued, but you should let them know the service location and times and leave it to them as to who can take time off work, etc to attend. My condolences to your husband and his family and God Bless.
2007-10-25 10:22:40 · answer #2 · answered by tersey562 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i never heard of an invite to a funeral..lol my mother passed 2 yrs ago and i or my brothers handed out invites. we told people and either they came or not. my mother knew who her friends and family was. i really dont think u should have people there that didnt have anything to do with the dead when they were alive. i would tell them to get over them selves its not a party. its a way for loved ones to say goodbye.they need to learn to be more respectful
2007-10-25 10:51:55 · answer #3 · answered by kitttkat2001 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi...
Well, people don't send out invitations to funerals and memorial services. Also, i'm sorry for your loss.
The main purpose of a funeral or memorial service is to give closure to those who are left behind. This is also a time for friends, relatives and acquaintences to offer support and show their respect for the family who has suffered a loss. So they don't have to KNOW the person who died.
When my mother died, several people who knew me, and not her, came to offer their condolences and to show me some compassion... this is quite normal. And maybe it's what your family wants to do -- offer their support and help, even if only for a few days.
that's my best answer.
2007-10-25 10:27:35 · answer #4 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why do you have such a problem with this?...with your family?...people attend funerals all the time to support those who have lost a loved one....many times they don't even know the deceased...apologize to your family for your reaction...and thank them for coming to support you and your husband's family...
a funeral is not like a birthday party....you do not get to choose the guest list..you do not send out invitations...anyone can come to the visitation and service...you sound so stressed out, or so full of grief that you are making such a big deal out of this...tell one member of your family to spread the word about the arrangements to everyone else, anyone can read the death notice in the paper with the details...
2007-10-25 10:15:40 · answer #5 · answered by mago 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
For some odd reason people start to act real funny once someone has passed away. But don't beat yourself up for it. Just tell then to deal with it, they are coming now so they should forget about it. I see where you are coming from how you didn't invite them, but usually people don't get invited to funerals, do they?
2007-10-25 10:14:27 · answer #6 · answered by make?love*not$war! 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
People are not INVITED to funerals.They are open to whoever wishes to pay their respects to the person passing on.I guess your family believes that because your father-in-law was part of your extended family that they would like to be there for your sake.Question....why has hardly any of your family ever met your father-in-law?
2007-10-25 10:18:49 · answer #7 · answered by Janell T 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I wouldn't invite them. Especially if your husband does not even like some of them. This is his fathers funeral, he should not have to feel any more distress than he already may be feeling.
2007-10-25 10:22:32 · answer #8 · answered by Mr.& Mrs.CoolBreeze SFCU 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
They probably want to come to support you. My hubby had a funeral recently and I didn't even know them but I went to support my hubby.
Sometimes people feel it's the right thing to do as a mark of respect.
2007-10-25 10:50:14 · answer #9 · answered by scattycow 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's better for them to shut up about not being invited which is ridiculous and just quietly show up and offer their condolences to you and your husband's family.
2007-10-25 10:51:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋