atfer a family row you found out you were concieved when your mum was rape would you want to find out who did it
2007-10-25 01:02:09 · 19 answers · asked by cabby 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I am the product of a rape myself. I would like to know who the guy is for a lot of reasons. 1. I now have a lot of health problems that are hereditary and I would like to know if it was from that side of the gene pool and what else i might expect. 2. even if that guy was a complete jerk doesnt mean that his whole family is. I would like to be able to get to know any brothers or sisters or grandparents. 3. I would like to tell him off and get that out of my system. In my case my father was only16 so maybe there was hope he could turn his life around although odds are hes in jail somewhere lol
2007-10-25 01:24:29 · answer #1 · answered by thumpergirl_1979 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If you want to answer some biological questions it might be helpful but just out of curiosity it would not be helpful. Children often wonder if they will turn out to be a criminal because they have "bad genes". It is often hard for a mother to raise a child of rape because they may resent the child as a burden or as a small version of their evil attacker. This is the reason that many of these babies are aborted or given up for adoption. Sounds like your family needs some family counseling to learn to deal with this past trauma.
2007-10-25 01:13:16 · answer #2 · answered by Diane M 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I wouldnt want to find out I was a child conceived of rape, but if I did find out I wouldnt want to know who did it. My dad is my dad whether biological or not. The only way I would try to find out was if I needed to know for medical reasons.
But I believe that children of rape victims do have the right to know their father if they choose to.
2007-10-25 02:17:30 · answer #3 · answered by Amanda 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When the child is an adult and can mentally cope with this.It would be very diffucult to know you were concieved threw hate .As long as they have a strong family support to know how much they are love.
2007-10-25 02:56:18 · answer #4 · answered by fuck 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No matter what the row was about you shouldn't have found out that way, it isn't nice. I would want to know if they have been punished for what they did, but I wouldn't want to know them personally, why make you doubt who you are. You would be nothing like them in personality, maybe some looks but who cares, you didn't before......right? Most kids who are adopted or in a similar situation start to doubt themselves and who they are when they find out these things, when in reality you are the same person no matter what your heritage.
Hope that helps.
2007-10-25 01:21:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yes if the mother knows who the father was who raped her. Even if she doesn't the child has every right to know how it was made.
2007-10-25 08:11:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that this should remain a secret until that "child" was an adult. As a child you could say that the dad is not around and he did a bad thing, so you won't be meeting him, etc... and then as they get older you could elaborate on the bad thing.
You can paint whatever scenario you want... you could turn it into an evil and revengeful situation, or you could choose to not spread that anger to your child and just explain that he wanted sex and you didn't and turn it into a learning lesson... and go into how you kept the baby and make it a positive on their end... remember their feelings, don't let them see your anger because they weren't a participant... keep their perspective clean from your hurt.
2007-10-25 02:09:05 · answer #7 · answered by amber 18 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
That's a tough one! Ordinarilly I'd say every child should have the right to know who made them. I don't agree with children being born through rape. It's a moral outrage to me. On the rare occassions it's allowed to happen I say yes the child should know. Society needs to be frank and open about this. I'm not a catholic anymore so I don't like the idea of bad things being swept under the carpet like rape births. Abortion can be the morally correct thing sometimes in my book.
2007-10-25 01:09:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 5⤋
No, I would never want to find out who brutally hurt my mother and forced her to have a child. It would be like meeting a monster, father or not.
However, I feel it should always be a right to anyone to be able to find out who their father is if they want to, regardless of how you were conceived.
2007-10-25 01:06:31 · answer #9 · answered by Eraserhead 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
honestly i would like to know who my father is my mom got raped and my older sister had to tell me that the guy that i thought was my dad was not my biological dad but he has been there for me so hes still my dad but i would like to know who my real dad is i only want to meet him i would never love him or consider him my father i just want to see if i look like him or something
2007-10-25 01:11:40 · answer #10 · answered by crystal 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋