More help please?

Question

Last week I asked a question about how I can stop some of my negative behavior and turn around. I'm happy to say that I've improved a little this week by controlling my anger better and finding ways to keep my emotions in control. But now I have to face probably my most difficult challenge yet. My fetishism. How do I stop indulging in it? How can I get rid of it? (if possibly) It's like a drug, I don't want to stop, but I've gotta before it eventually destroys me. It's horrible, it turns me on in ways I've never felt before. and also I'm sharing this w/ someone 8 years older than me. How do I tell him I want to stop? How am I gonna do this? Please help me. I'm 16, a disturbed teenage girl whose done alot of bad things. I've been depressed and angry since I was 13, when everything just collapsed, but I want to turn around now and make up for my horrible behavior. I want to start rebuilding my life.

ohhh, this isn't on tv or anything! and he's never touched me before this has strictly been a phone convos! We've never done anything, but turn each other on thru the phone.. and even tho I appreciate the depression tips, I need to FOCUS ON the fetishism. He's going to call soon, I can just sense it..and I need to get rid of that RIGHT NOW. Please help me get rid of fetish.

Answer 1

Ask your parents to send you to a female therapist.
Try some good diet & fitness ideas.
Here are some good ideas:
1. Do something that gets your heart rate up a bit like, walking, running, biking, and swimming.
2. Eat Whole, Organic foods like: Broccoli, Cabbage, Organic Brown Rice, Spinach, Sweet Potato, Apples, and other fruits and vegetables in their Natural State.
3. Avoid eating corn, white bread, white rice, candy, sodas, chips, and anything else that you already know you shouldn’t be eating.
4. Drink clean water as your beverage of choice. Avoid Fruit drinks and fruit juices (unless YOU juice them yourself)
5. Stop smoking, drinking beer & wine, and drinking coffee.
6. Get 8 hours of sleep each night.
7. Hang out with people who want to be healthy.
8. Avoid anything with High Fructose Corn Syrup.

Tone up the muscles:

1. Join a gym and get a trainer.
2. If you’re short on cash, start a light stretching & yoga regimen.
3. Do push-ups, and light dumbbell curls for the upper body.
4. As I said above, walk, run, swim, and or bike
5. Take an aerobics class, a yoga class, or some other fitness class.
6. Join the local YMCA..

Mental Health:

1. Get a friend to talk to each day about your feelings.
2. If you have some money or insurance, get a counselor to talk to.
3. Learn how to meditate.
4. Join a support group for the issue you’re dealing with.
5. Ask your Higher Self (or God) for guidance.
6. Start keeping a diary or journal about your feelings & thoughts.
7. Write a ‘gratitude’ list every night.
8. Do something that makes you happy each day like: listen to your favorite music, draw, paint, write, or anything creative.
9. Do something for someone else who needs help.

Answer 2

OK to stop indulging in a disruptive behavior you are going to have to cut all ties with it. Don't read about it or watch it on TV etc.

The person you are involved with has no right to tell you what to do with your body if he don't like it to bad no means no. If he refuses to listen dump him he has no respect for you.

You are old enough to make good decisions and young enough to make the changes that are necessary to start over.

Cut all ties off with this behavior or you will fall back into that pattern. That is what a addict has to do to be rid of that behavior is cut all ties even if it means cutting this person out of your life do it today do not delay the sooner you rid yourself of these kinds of problems the better.

Remember you are the master of your body your life nobody can control you that you do not let. Be strong you can do it.

Answer 3

hey hun
thnx 4 the advice that was very sweet of you =]
i think you gonna make a pretty big chnge with your life, i can tell by the determination in your words, and that really helped me!
i might sound dumb lol but what is fetishism??
p.s i don't think you've done anything bad, what we're going through is called Teen obstacles!
write me if you want at [e-mail]

Answer 4

Overcoming depression tips:

Make yourself busy. We all need to feel like we're involved in something significant. We need to participate in something outside ourselves. You might consider volunteering at a local women's shelter or food pantry. That will elevate your mood as well as your self esteem.

Exercise is good for us, but physical contact is equally important. Exercise affects brain chemicals, and the healing touch of physical closeness does too. If you're depressed, hug somebody - anybody, everybody! A hug is good medicine. It reduces stress and tension and it boosts your immunity to illness. Hugs raise self esteem and lower blood pressure. They feel good and make people happy. And they're free! Hugs are the universal language that communicates love and acceptance. They're healthy for the "hugger" as well as the "hugee."

Take up a sporting activity like walking, cycling, tennis, golf, water sports, riding, gliding, sailing, football, badminton. Something with a personal achievement goal. Spectator sports do not count and have little value for the purpose of defeating depression. Like alcohol (with which they are often associated) and television, they are simply ephemeral distractions. Depression cannot exist when the adrenaline is surging. Try bungee jumping.

Avoid substances that are unknown to cause mood swings or depressionlike alcohol, caffeine, chocolate and high sugar foods.

Learn to laugh. It really will make you feel better. Visit a local joke shop or toy shop. Buy books and magazines that you find entertaining and amusing rather than just educational. hire a funny video and invite one or two friends round to enjoy it with you.

Build up your self-confidence. People who suffer from depression often lack self-assurance. Write an advertisement for yourself listing all your good qualities. Carry your advert with you and look at it whenever you’re feeling down.

Have a pet. The pet, however, be it a parrot, a cat, a mouse or a dog do not have this problem. They love their ‘master’ unconditionally and this is fully reflected through their behavior. It is much easier overcoming depression and making your way back to normalcy when you are faced with the exceptional love of a pet (or more). It was observed that people whom pets were given want to become better, want to become useful, want to love back and hence slowly escape the clutches of depression and return to their old selfs.

Talk to someone about it. A problem shared is a problem halved. Have you ever felt better by getting something off your chest? Of course you have. Did talking about a problem in the past help to put it into perspective and perhaps make it easier to deal with. I would guess you have probably been there too. Depression is no different. Find someone you can trust and get talking about it. Friends, family, your doctor, support groups both online and off....You might even find that someone comes up with an idea you have never thought of which just might work for you.


Increasing confidence tips:

To know how you could go about boosting your self-confidence, you should first know yourself. Everything starts here. When you know who you are, what your strengths are, what your limits are, you can then conquer your fears, you can steel yourself to do the things you have to do.

People get confidence in a number of ways. Some take it from achievement, others from being loved, others by being productive for the sake of contributing something to the world. Find your own.

Knowing your limits, on the other hand, is equally crucial in knowing how to gain self-confidence. Because you know that you cannot do certain things, you will not thrust yourself into tasks that you are reasonably assured to fail.

Once you understand your weak points, you will have to work to resolve them. Take another look at that sales deal you have been pushing away for weeks now. Analyze it carefully and figure out where it is stalled. If you are afraid of failure, request the advice of someone more experienced.

Do something you are good at. How about swimming, running, dancing, cooking, gardening, climbing, painting, writing… If possible, it should be something that holds your attention and requires enough focus to get you into that state of 'flow' where you forget about everything else.

Stop thinking about yourself. I know this sounds strange, but low self esteem is often accompanied by too much focus on the self. Doing something that absorbs you and holds your attention can quickly make you feel better.

Remember all the things you have achieved. This can be difficult at first, but after a while, you'll develop a handy mental list of self-esteem boosting memories. Think about your achievements that you are good at. Most achievements come from that.

If you are feeling low, anxious or lacking in confidence, the first thing to do is to stop thinking and relax properly. Some people do this by exercising, others by involving themselves in something that occupies their mind. Stop thinking when the confidences get low.

Remember that you could be wrong! If you are feeling bad about yourself, remember that you way you feel affects your thoughts, memory and behavior. So when you feel bad, you will only remember the bad times, and will tend to be pessimistic about yourself. You will never know what true confidence-boosting success really means until you fail and learn from your mistakes.

Answer 5

i was an angry, depressed, hateful, teen that did a lot of bad things. i am gald to hear you are trying to turn your life around but in order to give you more info on what to do i need more info.