How can I tell my family that I have converted to Islam?

Question

I have recently converted to Islam, and I am not sure how I can tell my family. They are very religious, and would probably try to take me to church and revert my back Christianity. How should I tell them? What recations should I expect, and what should I do if they do not accept me? I have a close band with my family, and I do not want to loose that. What should I do?

Answer 1

Asalamualikum,
You should first tell them that you have learned a lot about Islam, and tell them about the misconceptions they might have had about islam. Then tell them about the teachings of islam, and then tell them you are a muslim.
Masalamah

Answer 2

if the need comes then stand against them,be strong in ur religion(islam).and keep try to convince them to embrace islam too.i hope one day they will also convert.

Answer 3

Assalamu Alaikom, and welcome to Islam. I have been Muslim for about 5 years. My family is not overly religious, so I didn't feel too bad telling them, but they thought I was "going through a phase". Maybe if I was fifteen, not in my twenties! I have many friends whose families take the news much better than they expect, and I have some friends who have even been disowned. This is especially hard for new Muslims because Islam teaches you to keep good relations with your kith and kin and respect your parents immensely regardless of their religions. I would suggest that as a new Muslim you try to get to know the Muslim community where you live. Make friends and attend classes. That will give you a support network if you need anything, or if you just need a shoulder to cry on. And, refuse to go to church with them! That's just degrading! As if your a puppet that can just be molded into whatever they want! But, remember above anything else, that they are your family, and they will love you no matter what. Maybe they will even learn some things about Islam. You can find so many inspirational stories on the internet of Muslim converts whose whole families then converted to Islam (Dave Chappelle). Be brave, and if you need a friend you can email me through my profile. Teena

Answer 4

Congratulations on embracing Islam! Alhamdulillah!

How does your family feel about Islam and Muslims? I think you should find that out first. They may have a healthy respect for Islam as a faith community and for Muslims as people of faith and will support your decision. On the other hand, if they hate Islam and Muslims, they may give you a hard time and insist that you return back to church and to Christianity. They may tell you that you're no longer "saved" and going to the hell-fire. They may not want to hear what you have to say. They may disown you to the point where you are no longer welcome in their home. All this may sound very harsh, and I would not want this to happen to you.

It is wonderful that you do not want to lose your close family bond; however, whatever the outcome, I strongly encourage you to please continue to love your family and always pray for them. I advise you to be gentle and pleasant, but firm when you tell them, and leave the outcome to Almighty God Allah, for He truly knows best.

Answer 5

If you have a close bond with your family, just tell them. Expect that they won't understand, and expect lots of questions as to why you have converted. What happened to make you convert? What drew you to Islam? Let them ask their questions and be open about your answers.

Expect them to be hurt and sad, but let them know that you are trying to find your own way. Be open and honest and remain loving and close with your family.

Answer 6

There are no exact directions that I can offer to you, because how you and your family deal with this is based on a number of things: your age, your community, your relationship with your family, your previous religious experiences, your parents' commitment (or lack of) to a certain religion, and their willingness to explore new ideas. Although it seems like a wacky idea, it has been said by other converts, and now by myself as well, that it oftentimes might be better to wait six months, a year or more to tell them. The reasons for this vary: you need to be more established in Islamic practices, and you need time to make friends and build a support system within the Muslim community. This is so that if your parents react to your announcement by attempting to "deprogram you," or schedule "an appointment" with the local minister / priest / rabbi, you will be able to rely on your knowledge of Qur'an, and the strength that being a practicing Muslim has given you. Allowing yourself time to build a support system within the Muslim community is important so that you will have friends to help and guide you, to help answer any questions or concerns your family might have, and to help you out should your parents decide that you can no longer live in their house. If you are fearful that your family may react with physical abuse, or a kidnapping and "deprogramming" attempt (yes, it happens), please make sure that you have someone there as a witness and support. Whether you are Muslim or not, you have the right not to be abused. If your family is abusive towards you, seek the necessary help to get out of that situation as soon as possible. Another reason that it might be wise to wait awhile is to allow your parents to see the positive changes that Islam will bring about in you: greater care to hygiene and appearance, greater discipline in your daily activities and your schoolwork, the fact that you are not falling under negative peer pressure to drink or drug or have sex, that you are more willing to honor your parents by helping around the house, that you are more attentive in your job (if you have one), etc. Allow them time to be pleased with these positive changes, so that they may see that Islam is for the better, not just for you, but for all people. If they see that Islam is "good for you," they may react more positively when you talk with them about it. good luck.

Answer 7

I know where you are coming from as my family are christians too. Infact we have two uncles who are priests in the family and I can tell you this. They will probably try to convert you.
Yes, my family have tried unsuccessfully to " knock some sense into me"

The things I hear even coming out of the priests mouth honestly make me laugh:
like: the muslims have taken the concept of trinity and disguised it as allah, alrahman, alrahim..

You can start by correcting their beliefs. For example: when my mom prays to other than God, I answer her " only God answers prayers". I also know about the bible and argue through the bible.
they will see the signs.

And Austin, you do not have to tell them till you are ready.

Answer 8

First of all, I want to congratulate you for coming into the true religion and following the teachings of Islam.

As far as letting your parents know, just make sure you are prepared to answer any question they have to ask. Explain to them how Islam is the right path to take in life and offer to teach them what you know and let them know at what point in your studying of Islam finalized your conversion. You never know what will come of it.

InshAllah all goes well for you and your family and may Allah lead them to the path of Islam as well.

Salaam.

Answer 9

If your family loves you and you are as close as you say you are... they shouldn't care that you're a different religion. Your family should respect your decision and even though they might not support it, they shouldn't shun you for it either.

The best thing to do is just to tell them. Don't play around with it for too long, just let them know what's going on.
BB

Answer 10

Firstly, and most importantly, you must be kind to them regardless of where they are in the road of life and their belief system. Islam teaches us that. As Allah (swt) says in the Qur'an:

Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in your lifetime, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor.
-Qur'an [17:23]

Secondly, I think you should speak to them softly but with a confident voice so that they could know that you have studied the religion and fully understand what it's about. Talk to them about the common things that are between Christianity and Islam and don't spend too much time discussing the differences, at least not in the beginning.

I know a friend who is a very devout Christian, goes very regularly to Church, but his father converted to Islam 30 years ago. His Muslim dad is still family to him and always sends him a recent copy of an English translation of the Qur'an every few years. He showed me all of them in his library. He respects his father and his father respects his son's choice to remain Christian, after all this time. That how family should be.

I encourage you to make a trip to Mecca and perform the 3umra. I did so when I was 16 years old with my family. It was certainly a life changing event and I've never forgotten how clear and vivid my outlook on life and science became.

I want to also tell you mabruk (congratulations) on your conversion to this great religion. I hope it satisfies your urge to find the truth about life and existence, and may Allah guide you and us all to the Right Path always, InShaAllah.

Salam brother.

Answer 11

Dear,

Thanks God Allah, you've chosen the right path to eternity. Congratulation. Welcome my dear Doctor Muslim, you're my brother. Welcome to Islam.

Dear, as a Muslim, you're must tell your family. It's Important because if you die, you have to be bury accordant to the Muslim religion. Sooner or later you must confess that you're a Muslim. There's no two ways about it. You like it or not you have to tell your family. They take it or not, that will be for them to think. Of course they doesn't want to loose you anyway. Take "Bilal" as an example. Bilal has shown the way. Do not be afraid. God Allah Subhanahu Wata'ala is always beside you and favor you.