School dance this friday....boys....HELP!!?

Question

please dont say mean things in response to my question...

Okay, so i am a teenage girl. i have never even kissed a guy and i dont have a boyfriend...a school dance is coming up this friday and im really excited and im going with my 2 best friends. we r going to straighten our hair and put on makeup and stuff. I get really nervous around boys but people (including guys) always tell me im beautiful. i dont have enough confidence to talk to boys, i get sooo nervous. i really want a boyfriend....please will someone help me. (im in 8th grade, by the way, if that helps at all) HOW DO I FLIRT????

Answer 1

well, there's two ways to answer that...
(i'm pretty much in your situation except in ninth grade... and im a boy in an all-boys school)

You can either pluck up the courage to talk to someone at your dance and have them get the idea that you like him...

OR

you can be passive and wait for someone to notice you and talk to you... normally the guy'll ask, but according to my friends, some of them have been approached by girls and started a relationship.

It's your choice on how to approach it, but i'll tell you what: i've got a dance on Friday to go to as well, if my parents feel like letting me go since i failed math... ill talk to someone and try to start a relationship on Friday if you do...

Answer 2

It's all about confidence, sweetie. If you look good and feel good and are proud of who you are, then others will take notice: including guys. If I were you, I'd make sure I was looking SMOKING at the dance, have fun with your girls, dance, laugh, and just get your groove on. Don't stand around tugging at your hair and fidgeting with your clothes...these things signal insecurity which is not attractive. You have to walk into that dance like you own it- like you are the HOTTEST girl there. And you have to truly believe it. If people are always telling you that you are beautiful, then obviously you are! So you should start to believe it and be more confident in yourself. People are attracted to confidence- simple as that. Next, when it comes to flirting, just be happy. Smile a lot. Make eye contact. Giggle. Make little touches- don't hit or punch. Some girls do this too much and it's very annoying. If a guy makes a funny joke or gives you a compliment, just give him a light touch on the arm while you are responding to him. Play with your jewelry. If a guy is talking to you, lightly tug on your earrings or fiddle with your neclace. (Not to be mistaken for FIDGETING) Look in his eyes while doing this- don't look away. I'm not sure what your personality is, but if you're good at it, be a little sarcastic. Example: If a guy says something like "You look really good tonight!" Say something like "Oh, I know!" and then laugh, letting him know you are just kidding around and not being totally cocky. Bottom line: you've just got to have confidence and stop being nervous when talking to guys. After all, they're JUST guys. They are insecure and nervous too. Being in the 8th grade, all of you are going through the same things. Puberty, pushing boundaries, insecurities, uncertainties, trying to figure out what kind of person you want to be, trying to impress other people, etc. Just learn to be comfortable with yourself and talking to guys will become a breeze. Good luck at the dance!! Take lots of pictures :)

Answer 3

ok first guys r just people u gotta look at it like that. i know u have talked to some guy at some point maybe a random guy in a store, a sales person, a cousin, a friend, some guy. u have to think of it as that its just a guy a person a human being. so dont be too nervous i mean i know ur gonna be nervous i get nervous sometimes right before i talk to a girl i really like but usually once i break the ice (actually start a conversation with them) im fine. you should be too so talk to em.

secondly as far as flirting goes i know alot of girls do that play with the hair thing and they laugh alot (but im usually a pretty funny guy so that could be y) umm not really sure what else to tell u im not a girl

anyways hope i helped good luck and remember guys r just people just like u

Answer 4

Start by telling yourself over and over that you are a beautiful and interesting person, think of nice things people have said it to you, even write them down if you want, and eventually you will believe them! This actually does work, it made me sooo much more confident.

Then when you are talking to guys, remember you don't need to talk constantly, this can be really annoying anyway. Just tell yourself it is no big deal, pretend you're talking to a girl, anything to make you feel at ease.

Just say things like 'hey, how are you', this is a surprisingly easy conversation starter! Ask questions and they will talk about themselves and ask you stuff and you'll start to relax!

Smile lots (but don't look fake), make eye contact and give compliments if you like the guy. Lots of arm touching when you laugh and talk is good too, pretty basic flirting!

Don't think that you need a boyfriend, sure it's fun, but if you put pressure on yourself to get one it just won't work out and you'll be more nervous!!

Don't worry about it and remember most guys are nervous too!

Have a brilliant time!

Answer 5

I think you're still a little too young to be worrying about this. Your nervousness is a result of that. I was really nervous around boys when I was your age, and I didn't have a real boyfriend until I was 16. I was mature enough, and the nervousness was gone. If I were you I would just go and have an awesome time with your friends, and not worry about flirting.

Answer 6

Maybe, you and a friend could talk to some boys you like, that way you're not really alone. They can help you open up to the boys. Smile, and sometimes it helps to tell them, that you're not sure what to say, then let them lead. Whatever you do, don't expect to have a boyfriend by the end of the dance, you will only leave disappointed. If others say you're beautiful, you must believe it, and use it to believe in yourself. Good luck, and have a great time!

Answer 7

Hold on there sweetie........you're just in the 8th grade for Heaven's sake. Almost everyone is nervous about the opposite sex at that age. You don't need to be growing up that fast wanting to learn how to flirt. That needs to be a natural process one that doesn't get rushed. The day will probably come when you wished you had done more kid stuff than growing up too quickly. I going to do you a favor by not telling you how to flirt. You're about 2 years early on that request.

When you go to the dance, you'd be better off just being nice to everyone and observing others who may be older than you.

Good luck sweetie and don't grow up too fast. Enjoy it while you're young.

Answer 8

I know that theres all of this advice here: how to get boys, how to flirt, what makeup to wear etc. And you MUST be concerned for posting on here in the first place lol, well all I can say is:
STOP WORRYING. Growing up and learning such things as confidence, who you are etc is all part of life. When you get older you will realise what a small part of your life this one day of the whole year was. (That is , of course, unless you do something DRASTICALLY mentally infringing that is going to affect the rest of your social life- like forgetting to wear all your clothes or something lol)
When you get older you will realise that there are more politically and worse things in this life than stressing over one dance.
Just take the advice of the people here to make yourself feel better and get that confidence, enjoy being young and free for now with the only worry is that matching pair of shoes and handbag :)

Answer 9

Well to get ANY guy to give you attention you have to have confidence. You also need to just hang with your girls and have fun without letting the guys there know that you have butterflies in your stomach. Next you need to realize that guys your age are SUPER insecure. There is a great chance that its not you, its them. Thats why most guys wont approcah you. Just be confident , hang with you girl friends and when you walk into the room make believe that eveyone thinks your hot and it should boost your ego. Umm I know that sounds bad but a lot of my friends still have the shy problem and they get over it when they try that. Confidence is everything! The flirting will come with that confidence. Good Luck!

Answer 10

Just be yourself. If people, including guys, keep telling you that you're pretty you must be pretty! Why not be confident about that?

I used to have the same problem with girls. I couldn't talk to them, was scared to make a move and so on... Then I just realized that I like myself and I am confident in myself. If people don't like me thats fine. Im not going to change for them. You are still young...just think of all the boys in the world...in your state even! You might want a bf now, but you will be fine if you don't get one. You still have your friends and family.

So like I said...just be yourself. Show that you're confident in yourself and just go with the flow. The guys will come.

Good luck!

Answer 11

Flirting is basically having a conversation with a bit of extra smiling and laughing.

Most people are nervous around the opposite sex, but practice makes perfect. Think up some things to say and make it a goal to talk to 3 boys, even if it is just "Hi, this punch is good, huh?"

Don't get discouraged if they don't respond, they are nervous, too.