My friend built up a serious relationship with a women for 9 months. She sent him pictures of herself and he was pleased what he saw. When he offered her and her two kids tickets to come to the UK to meet. Reality set in his friend confessed to be a man and not the women of his life. I wonder how many others have experenced the same. He has finally come to his senses that there are far too many unstable people using the internet .
2007-10-24 06:16:05 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You literally can't have a "serious relationship" with someone over the internet. The "serious relationship" is the fantasy of the person you build in your own head, and has nothing to do with reality.
2007-10-24 06:20:14 · answer #1 · answered by Landlord 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
There's all kinds out there. Some will be playing games for their own amusement or wish fulfillment. Others are just having fun and really don't want to take things to the next stage and make it a real life thing. It's possible that this person your friend met on-line is a woman, but paniced when she was invited to meet. That's a big commitment your friend was asking for really. For all you know she's married and was just flirting on the internet because it's safe.
I've known people that have had both bad luck and good luck with internet relationships. My advice to your friend is to learn from this. Instead of just dismissing the internet thing entirely, he just has to be more thorough. Before you invite someone to see you in person, do a few voice and video chats. If they flat out refuse to do that, then there's either a secret they're keeping from you, or from someone else at their end.
2007-10-24 06:31:08 · answer #2 · answered by rohak1212 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats awful : ( Poor guy... there are just as many people like that outside in real life too.. but you usually don't find out what is wrong with them until after you have been dating them for a while lol... The internet allows people to play out a fantasy, presenting themselves as the perfect man/woman.. when in reality no one is perfect. They can present their best face everytime they talk to you - its a confidence boost for them. That goes for friendships as well as romance.
I was (maybe still am being) stalked by someone I considered a casual friend on the internet (we had spoken on the phone a few times). Now I don't tell anyone anything personal at all beyond answering "How are you today", unless I already know them in my own real life.
2007-10-24 06:22:38 · answer #3 · answered by boots6 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I honestly believe that the majority of people using online dating are unstable & afraid of relationships. I've been talking to people online for the past 13 years or so... never have I EVER met a single guy who was mentally stable!! LOL
Seriously - they were all crazy, obsessive, and just plain scary in person!!
People whose sole form of dating is online dating - have issues. They are hiding behind the anonymity of the computer. A computer is so impersonal - and these people probably have severe issues with communication (face to face), intimacy, and everything else that goes along with it.
It's so easy to lie online about who you are & what your intentions are.
I would never trust anyone I met online.
The internet is for freaks & rejects who have no hope of ever meeting a normal person in a live social setting.
I'm sure the number of normal, stable people online, looking for love, is like less than 5%. So the chances of two normal, stable people connecting & being compatible is almost nil.
2007-10-24 06:28:24 · answer #4 · answered by Rue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be really careful and make sure you talk to the person on the phone also. It's a good idea to catch some of his/her friends over and talk to them also...it gives you an idea of who the person really is and if the situation is real. It's also a good idea to become friends with his/her friends. I met my husband online 3 years ago and we're still in love. At the time I even thought it was bizarre, but I followed my heart and was careful at the same time. Also, talk to the person on more than one chat site or whatever. Search the person's name, address, phone number and other history information. You can usually call places of work and ask if the person still works there. Let the person you're talking to know or don't, whatever. If the end result is positive it will give you something to laugh about in the end. And, he/she should be researching you too!
2007-10-24 06:22:16 · answer #5 · answered by Brandy W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A person does not know who might be at the other end. That is why if you do meet someone from the internet, it should always be in a safe well lit area. I personally am dating a man I met on the internet 4 years ago.
2007-10-24 06:21:08 · answer #6 · answered by Harley Lady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not know who you are really talking to on the Internet, and there are stories like this or worse everyday. If you really want a real relationship, you need to talk to and see a real person, If you want sweet nothings, with no reality to it, stick to the Internet .
Some people enjoy fantasy, I my self, am a up close and personal person and would rather live in reality.
2007-10-24 06:24:27 · answer #7 · answered by fuzzykitty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It always happens like this, first things first, pay should be a b*tch for that women/man of his life for lying for almost a year. I just say internet is for entertainment, never get too serious before you actually met the person face to face. Because 9 out of 10 times its always a prankster
2007-10-24 06:20:09 · answer #8 · answered by mr fugi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've also experienced that. I met a guy online, on a dating site. He seemed great. He was a single dad of twins, and I have twins as well. We exchanged photos, talked for hours and hours. Literally, I'd wake up early in the morning and we'd talk on MSN, then we'd talk for hours everyday in the evening, it was like an addiction. We had planned on meeting very soon, had talked about getting married, having babies (had even picked out names), had looked into what I would have to do to move from Canada to the USA (he lived in NYC). Anyways, after about 4 months, I didn't hear from him for a couple days, and then got a call (at my job!!) from this woman who was all like "*****, you better stop messin with my man!" I've never talked to him since, he never called to say he was sorry or even to try and explain and get me back.
2007-10-24 06:25:11 · answer #9 · answered by who-wants-to-know 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no way you can have a serious relationship via the Internet alone.
You can't know anything much about the person until you meet them - as your case illustrates
2007-10-24 06:20:17 · answer #10 · answered by StretfordEnder 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋