Have you ever had a friend sever your friendship simply because you didn't believe the same way spiritually?

Question

No disagreement or falling out--they simply walked away with no word or explanation? Did you understand why they did it or were you left dumbfounded?
This question is for all belief systems. Thanks!

(((messageoflove)))

Answer 1

because I asked a question. about christian fundamentalists. i discovered i had many christians on my contact list. i liked all of them. not one of them did i dislike in the slightest. however, once i asked them to read "a brief history of time" by stephen hawking, immediately i started getting violations for old questions. my q/a's are not open, meaning only people on my contact list would start reporting old questions. do you think some atheist all of the sudden decided to start reporting one of their own? maybe, this place is very strange indeed. i really like you beano. this place makes me ill. i tried to cross boundaries, and i don't think they are crossable. i did not want to block every christian, so i asked that they remove themselves from my contact list. why? to give me time to think before my account was deleted once again. and deleted for what ? trying to have fun with my friends? for not believing in god? well, i don't believe in god, but i do believe in my friends. but not every one, it would seem is friendly here.

Answer 2

There are several reasons that you could say the friendship was never real. It is possible that one of the "friends" in question subconsciously put on a mask to win over the others affection in the beginning and when they got comfortable they stopped acting. Sometimes people want to be another persons friend so badly that they pretend they're someone they're not. I've seen this a lot in my life. I don't think this happens on purpose. It's been my experience that the person who was pretending often gets hurt in this scenario and I usually feel really badly for them. They're usually a sad, lonely person who just wanted to connect with someone they admired. It's also possible that one of the "friends" was pretending to be someone else on purpose to get something they wanted. Sex, material rewards and popularity are the biggest reasons people do this. I've also had this one happen to me but not nearly as often as I'm always on the lookout for it. Now when this one happens I get PISSED even if it was not done to me. This is just a real crappy thing to do to another person. But there are reasons that a REAL friendship goes bad too. People change over time and grow apart. One word; divorce. While most people don't often think of a marriage as a friendship, as I understand it, that is an integral part of any good such union. Just like with a marriage that started out as a wonderfully fulfilling relationship, friends can also grow apart. I had the same guy as my very best friend in the world for almost thirty years since we were kids. He changed. I changed. We "broke up" about a year and a half ago. We are now so incompatible that we can't stand to even be in the same bar at the same time. Not his fault. Not my fault. It just happens. Sometimes something severe takes place that will change one of the friends. Essentially its the same thing as above but instead of taking years it can happen in an instance. I've known people to come away from traumatic events changed. A car wreck, the loss of a loved one, a divorce... there are lot's of stressors that can change the way a person approaches life and that can destroy friendships that were once very real. We're human. We are inherently weak sometimes and quite often hurt others without intending to do so. It's hard to just walk away and sometimes we hold on too tightly for too long. That's when it gets bad. I try to approach these situations, whether it's happened to me or someone else, with patience and understanding. Often times for me the best way to deal with it is to acknowledge that the friendship is over, whether or not it was "real" in the first place, and just walk away. Don't try to understand what happened. Don't analyze it to death. Just get out of it. (((*Moon Goddess Erin*)))

Answer 3

I'm kind of in that situation now...except I'm the one walking away. An old high school pal has walked down a path I don't agree with. Which is fine...I enjoy having a group of diverse friends. But her new pursuits have changed her to the core. I don't know her anymore and we don't relate.
I was also hurt because she placed greater value on using me as a stepping stone to get to where she wants to be, rather than maintaining our friendship. To cut a long story short, she tried to use me for financial/egotistical gain.
We were great friends in high school, and I have fond memories of her. We only communicate via email now, and I thought it better to simply let things cool off between us and not pursue the friendship rather than ending it by confronting her and having a fight.
With her present values and lifestyle, our friendship isn't viable. Maybe one days things will change, but in honor of the friendship we once had, I prefer to end it quietly and not make a scene.

BTW...to keep on topic...I'm an atheist :)

Answer 4

My best friend that I've known my whole life was into the dark side for a long time. He has tattoos of inverted crosses on his arms and signs of the devil (he was into death metal, as even I was back in the day). He went into the Marines (not to exactly say the Marines was the reason) and became born again. He told me he sang in the choir w/ the Marines and proudly wears his cross (the right way). I would never have left him as my friend. I never pressured him, but when he came around, I did speak with him about my relationship with God and he shared his new point of view. Regardless, I would never leave a friend, but try to help them.

Answer 5

Never in real life. I have distanced myself from friends who were substance abusers to the point I did not want to be in their home because of the legal ramifications. They happened not to believe as I believe, but that difference had not caused the distance. I choose not to be around illegal activity unless there is something I can do to remove someone from danger. Having tried this on more than one occasion, it was not received well. I am here for them. On this forum I think it can happen easier because we only have the stark written word.

Answer 6

No, and I would submit that such a friend probably 1) wasn't a friend to begin with or 2) because of cult brainwashing needed more than ever, despite his/her actions.

To sever a friendship on this basis is a sign of spiritual immaturity, not enlightenment.

Answer 7

Yes actually. Some of my very own family. Those who professed to be great and devout christians with open arms and agape love. I guess that only applies if:

1 - You agree
2- They are working with you in the hopes that you will agree

So I guess dumbfounded.

Answer 8

Happens to me all the time, and I believe it is because of doctrinal beliefs...
We MUST learn to love each other, even though there is a difference in teachings.
We MUST come together into a unified body of Christ.

Answer 9

Never happened to me, whoever sits up there was generous with giving me close friends from each religion at every crucial point in my life. They were all very open minded and gave me insight in to all major religions. I now have a balanced view of all religions.

Answer 10

Sometimes, beano, people leave friendships for reason we don't understand. And where you might think it is a difference in beliefs, there might be something going on that you did not really understand and there was no way that person could explain...