other then your share of the food? i go to my bfs house on a thursday night and leave monday morning. i usually bring food to cook for tea each night and when we go out for lunch etc i somtimes pay (when he lets me!). should i be offering to pay towards household bills? any advice would be appreciated! been with him 4 months. ta x
2007-10-24 03:17:29 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
p.s...i clean while im there (which is the only time it gets done!) and as well as cook i do the washing up..lol
2007-10-24 03:22:45 · update #1
Ask her out.
What are you waiting for?
An invitation card?
2007-10-24 15:28:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's a tough question. You're admittedly spending over half of each week (4 days out of 7) at his house, using not only his food but his electricity and water (which in some cities/states are not cheap to pay for), possibly watching his cable or using his internet (if he has it -- I'm speculating)... that's actually a lot. It can add up.
On the other hand, you've only been with him for 4 months. Offering to pay for bills (or being asked to pay for bills) hints at a level of commitment in the relationship you might not be ready for. It could also suggest (if he's demanding you oay for the bills) that he's using you on some level. (not knowing the guy, I am largely speculating here.)
Also, if you have your own place, you have your own bills to pay, too.
This is a really tough call.
I would say -- maybe if you could afford to part with extra cash, you could definitely help pay for it. Having you spend half of every month in his house actually doubles his utilities (water, electricity, gas, etc) because they are used more to accommodate an extra whole person.
Or else, if you have your own house/apartment too, maybe you should consider inviting him over to your place a little more often instead? Balance things out a little more.
2007-10-24 03:31:20 · answer #2 · answered by meadowbee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a hard question to answer. I'm a guy, I've had g/fs who have basically moved in with me. At first it's great but then it starts cutting into my expenses. She would go shopping and then I'm paying for the increased water, electricity, etc.
Being a guy, I would appreciate some help on the bills. Nothing major but maybe a "hey here's 30 bucks for help on the utilities." Food was the major problem. It's expensive and living single and then having a girl, your food bills go from $50 to $150.
But I would never break up with a girl because of this. Thats awesome your thinking about these kinds of things. He's a lucky guy.
2007-10-24 03:26:02 · answer #3 · answered by USAGUY 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd pay for the food or bring my own food and when we go out that's when he lets me. I don't think he should expect you to pay though not unless your there full time but if you want to it couldn't hurt I was thinking the samething when Kris moves as I will be there 3-4 times a week right now he has a roommate.
2007-10-24 03:23:37 · answer #4 · answered by Noneofyabusiness 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he lives with roommates, definitely. There is nothing worse than a roommate's girlfriend or boyfriend using up all your stuff and making the bills larger and not paying for anything. If there are no roommates, why don't you just move in together. You practically live there anyway and there is no sense in you paying bills at your place and then staying at his anyway.
2007-10-24 03:30:21 · answer #5 · answered by FSM Raguru AM™ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't offer to pay for anything ... you go over for 3-4 nights a week ..you have your own bills at your own house ... I would just let it go as it is. ... but you may want to try addressing the idea of living together ... since your almost there now.
2007-10-24 03:21:00 · answer #6 · answered by emnari 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No way. And I'm assuming that since he doesn't even want you to pay when you go out, he isn't asking for you to help with the bills. That's very good. :)
He's paying his bills anyway AND he's getting the pleasure of your company... don't you think that's payment enough? :)
In my eyes, you don't owe him anything. If it was him staying with you for the weekend, would you expect him to pay part of the bills?
2007-10-24 03:21:39 · answer #7 · answered by nite_angelica 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you should be paying.
You don't really know how serious
your relationship is getting since it's been only 4 months.
If you move in for good then you should offer to pay bills,
till then you should keep at what your doing.
2007-10-24 03:22:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Bills are his problem until you living together or married.
It's nice to be thoughtful about food, but I wouldn't expect my girlfriend to pitch in on electric, water, and gas. I don't offer her $5 for the water I use in her shower, why should she pay me?
2007-10-24 03:22:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe the landlord is telling him to pay more because you use more water and electricity and on the landlords part that is fare but if only coming from a boy friend then that is a little cheesy. even though if he sees an increase in utility's that he pays that is part of life as a couple .
2007-10-24 03:23:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, if you're not actually living with him (like having your address moved there).
You do enough if you take care of grocery shopping. That's a good thing to do.
But as a matter of household bills... no.
If he wants you to pay... then he needs to express you a serious commitment!
2007-10-24 03:22:42 · answer #11 · answered by Aredhel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋