There has been an ongoing argument between my brother and his wife and my mother. Something happened about 2 months ago that had made them stop talking. So anyway, ever since then i have tried to write to my brother through his myspace b/c i didnt want to call b/c i didnt want to talk to her and she always picks up the phone. So i wrote to him a letter about how he is being so childish and how he can't do this to his own mother. SHE responded back to me!!! I feel like she is cutting off all communication to my brother. My mom took him to the side last weekend, b/c she still goes over there to see her new grandchild, and she wanted to talk to him privately when he had the chance. He called up last night saying how they want to talk with her and how if she calls back she can speak with his wife and tehy can set something up.
2007-10-24 02:17:31 · 10 answers · asked by AngryFalafel 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Does this man have no balls??? I mean, obviously she has taken them and hid them somewhere. I feel like i have to make an appointment with HER just to see/speak to my brother. I don't know what to do, i have talked with all of my friends and family and we just dont know what to do. Should i get involved and speak up ? Or should i just leave it alone b/c he is just too far gone at this point??
Thanks for the help.
2007-10-24 02:18:20 · update #1
tjnstlouismo- I have respect for them, and this is why i have tried to stay out of it. But she turned my sister against my mother, now my sister doesnt believe anything my mother says about what they did. She is a manipulator , and that is why i refused to talk to her. She also disrespects my mother by sending emails to her job and telling her how everyone my mom knows and she knows ,says that my mother is wrong. Would you let an in law say things to your mother that were disrespectful?? When your mother was right to start with? My brother needs a controlling partner , but this is just going too far. How can you tell me to stay out of it when all i want to do is talk to my brother? lol Like i said i feel like i have t make an appointment wit HER just to speak to him. I don't find that to be wrong.
2007-10-24 02:41:55 · update #2
Sometimes it seems the man has no "manhood" BUT their wife can make life SO miserable on them they just give in. Yes, I am speaking from experience.
I wish my son would of had a sibling like you to get involved in the situation.
What she is doing is called control. This is a symptom of emotional abuse. Look into it. Also isolation from family and friends is another symptom. By not letting him have communication with your family she is brainwashing her views on him. Yep, brainwashing is another.
See any red flags here? Take advice from people that have been thru the same thing. Not all the ones out there bad mouthing your mom or brother. Yes the wife should come first but not to the point where she is emotional abusing your brother.
2007-10-24 04:00:57 · answer #1 · answered by proud grandma 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Fighting with the sister in law will never bring peaceful harmony in the family. You may not think much of your brother in terms of manliness, but expressing your opinion on his myspace page is not the best way to resolve issues, especially when others can see what you wrote. Obviously, this woman has a firm hold on your brother and she has persuaded him that it is an 'Us Against Them' situation, and your brother wants to resolve it but he feels better going through his wife. I think this you should stay out it, it had nothing to do with you (I know you feel he speaking to your mother but she should resolve that) and when you get involved (with other family members) the snowball becomes an avalanche. I know you love your mom and your brother but its best to let them talk it out.
2007-10-24 02:31:56 · answer #2 · answered by MissBarcelona 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I really dont know what to say.....cuz my MIL and SIL are just awfull.....but i wouldnt stand there and take there crap if it was directed towards me or my family. Thats when my husband needs to step in and say hey...this is my wife....but in your situation.......geezee......i guess i would not try to communicate with them anymore, i mean your brother is grown and should have a back bone....your mother on the other hand should just change her e mail address and phone number.....if he is treating her that way too then she should cut off communication with her too.
2007-10-24 03:01:38 · answer #3 · answered by $martA$$.com 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your brother is a grown man. He can choose to stand up to his wife, or let her have all the control. The decision is his, not yours.
If your brother doesn't have a problem with the way his wife handles things, then there is nothing you can do and there's no use saying anything to your brother about it.
Trust me, I have some issues with my brother and his wife, but have come to realize there's nothing I can do about it. It's his life (and his wife's life) and that's how it is.
2007-10-24 02:40:13 · answer #4 · answered by Loves the Ponies 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can mind your own business. None of this has anything to do with you, and you are purposefully making trouble for your brother. Back off, its your mom and your brothers problem, not yours.
You apparently don't have any respect for your brother nor do you have a clue about marriage. Your brother obviously can handle his life, and he's doing what he's supposed to, being a husband.
You've got a choice here. You can continue to further distance yourself and your brother because of your inappropriate busybodyness or you can grow up and let him live his own life. And if that means he lets his wife do his talking for him, then so be it.
2007-10-24 02:31:49 · answer #5 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
i think a lot of times when this happens between wife and in-laws...everyone involved forgets that the wife IS family too.
she is not some stranger that has invaded your family. she is his wife. and as such comes FIRST in his life now, followed by their child.
are you married? would you enjoy your husband making plans w/out including you? would you enjoy your mother in law making plans w/out you...or choosing to leave you out?
perhaps it's time to be an adult and talk to your sister-in-law in such a manner. get HER side of things and see if you cannot come to understand WHY she is acting this way. ppl don't usually act like that w/out reason. this could be a HUGE misunderstanding. and your brother, being a good husband is standing by the woman he made a commitment to.
2007-10-24 02:42:39 · answer #6 · answered by ☆MWφM☆ 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
oh i would get involved. i went through similar with my ex (daughters dad), the only way i could communicate with him without her butting her nose was through email, but then she was hacking in and replying back to me. AHH i dont thing so!
This is your brother, your family, and you dont let anyone, anyone, come in the middle of that. You brother is obviously feeling stuck between a rock and a hard place concidering its involving his wife, who he loves, and his mother who is loves... glad im not him,,,, If you feel you can help the situation, then help, if you think it may make things worse, then i would let them sort it out
2007-10-24 02:26:06 · answer #7 · answered by louie 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
it sounds like it's her way or no way. but he's the one letting her do that. so it sounds to me he has agreed to have it that way. so even tho you feel that way if you want your relationship with your brother you need to over look things and let it go. and yes he has lost them. they are probally put away now
2007-10-24 02:32:49 · answer #8 · answered by jeannieboop 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
.yes. you should get involve cause that is a family problem. maybe someday they will regret if they will never talk to each other.and make it settle.
2007-10-24 02:32:46 · answer #9 · answered by dandee_dandee 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some men defer to their wives in all things. But you are right, he has no stones. Tell him he's a wimp.
2007-10-24 02:25:37 · answer #10 · answered by Lisa W 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋