My boyfriend wants to invite children...
I would like to have an adults only wedding...
The wedding will take place from late afternoon to evening.
What do you think?
2007-10-23 14:27:22 · 20 answers · asked by ? 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I agree with you but here is why..... Kids at any age no matter how well behaved, They do not want to sit through 5 hours of adults making speeches, Special dances, and talking to other adults.
This is why most children get loud, cry, whine, and cause a scene because they are board. Plus most parents don't keep on eye on Jr. or Jr just doesn't listen. Either way I have seen it all and as a guest I like not to have to deal with other people children because there are to busy chatting or get a drink. I have seen kids run from there parents and try to hide under the bride's dress, or get away from a parent at the ceremony and walk around behind the rev and the couple.
Plus would you take your child to a bar? No why because people are drinking and dancing and it is in a hall right. Plus it is for adults right? Hello what is a Wedding.
Some say it is a important that family be there and children are family........true right.........Well When was the earliest you remember going to a wedding and enjoyed going? Personally we were takeing to many wedding when were younger (there is 6 of us). The one I enjoyed going to was when I was 12 and then I got the point of a wedding I understood what was going on!
This however this my point of view and thankfully my soon to be thinks the same way! Some will tell you should hire a babysitter, I think it is dumb. If parents cant find a babysitter they trust with there kids why is ok for a bride to hire a stranger to watch there kids and there ok with it? Why because there not paying for it that is why!
Best wishes and good luck in planning your special day!
2007-10-24 09:50:54 · answer #1 · answered by typicalcagirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Figure out how many kids you're talking about here. If only one or two of your guests has a child, then you'd be really p*ssing off the one or two guests, they'd likely feel discriminated against.
Clearly you don't want a church full of screaming babies on your wedding day. On the other hand, you don't want guests not to show because they cannot find a babysitter.
I just read in one of my bridal magazines (I'm newly engaged...hence I have all the bridal magazines) about having a babysitter present at your wedding. That could be a good idea. If you set up a kids table and have someone watch over them. Or have a games room where they can play (their parents can supervise if you can't find a babysitter).
I've found that a lot of people bring their kids to the ceremony, but bring them home after that because they begin to get antsy. So you could say, adults only at the reception.
Saying "no kids" gets awkward if you have out-of-town guests with kids. So if your aunt from overseas is the only person with a kid, then saying no kids is not fair.
In the end it's your wedding. As much as I don't want screaming kids at my wedding, I want everyone to be there to celebrate my day - so I'll tolerate kids.
2007-10-23 22:24:05 · answer #2 · answered by miss_j 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I didn't want children either, but it seems they'll be there anyways. It's not that big of an issue for me because I'll be too worried about everything else and just ignore the kids. How much does it mean to you that you don't have children at your wedding?
I suspect a lot of parents will just take their children to the ceremony and find a sitter for the reception. That's what my parents always did with me. Parents deserve an evening away from the kids.
Perhaps you and your boyfriend can compromise, kids at the ceremony and no kids at the reception. It'll be totally understandable if you're having alcohol at your reception or if it'll last late into the night.
2007-10-23 22:06:40 · answer #3 · answered by some female 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ah, the age old debate. On one hand, if it is an adult reception they will have to find someone to watch the children. On the other hand, if the children are at the reception, the parents may not be able to enjoy the wedding because they must watch and entertain them.
Personally, I just don't think younger children understand all that is expected of them and can be overwhelmed, which can create problems.
You may wish to consider having a separate area with babysitters who can do a smaller party with activities for the kids. That way the parents can enjoy themselves as well as the children.
I've seen weddings done both ways. Bottom line is it depends on the children -- age and how well mannered they are.
2007-10-23 21:42:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Children are part of the wedding/life cycle. I happen to love to have children of all ages at the wedding I preform. However, if the possibility of children disrupting your ceremony is on your mind, then you might want to place a note on the invitations stating no children. This will upset many, as many believe that if you ask the mother and father you are including the family. Having a babysitter is one answer, also if you have a church with a "baby room" they can use that. Blessings, Chaplain Debby
2007-10-23 22:29:22 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Unless you are really willing to make concessions for kids: provide activities, have a kid friendly menu, Please DO NOT invite.
As a mom, when the kids are included I assume that they are welcomed, which means that it will be a very kid friendly environment and that they aren't just being invited to be nice. That there will be some level of accomodations.
Also, as a mom, I am more than happy to find a babysitter then to bring my kids somewhere where they actually don't really belong.
Late afternoon to evening is the witching hour for kids. They will get hungry, then they will get tired. You will need to make sure they have snacks and activities right at the begninning of the reception.
You need to really look at the numbers,
how many kids are you talking about?
how many are coming in from out of town with kids? (that's the trickiest, if people are travelling from out of town with kids, then you almost have to the kids).
how well do you know the kids and their behavior?
I had no kids at my reception, but then again, the only people coming in from out of town was college room mates (no kids) and elderly aunts and uncles (no kids again.). I knew very few people with kids at the time so it was easy. My brother DID have kids, but they knew all the kids that would be coming and all of them were very good kids.
2007-10-23 22:35:31 · answer #6 · answered by apbanpos 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would have loved an adults only wedding and reception!! Fiance says that the majority of our friends could not attend if we made that the rule, not to mention many of them would be extremely offended! So I am just going to cross my fingers that the kids are good and provide something to occupy them while they are there.
2007-10-23 22:59:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I honestly sat down and me and my fiance decided no kids. Itswas a mutual decision. At first I wanted kids, we listed pros and cons as to why and why not invite them and decided its best not to.
We decided a lot of people let their kids run around, our weddings a long drive, and the kids shouldnt be out as late as the adults will be. and if theres alcohol kids shouldnt be there anyways things get out of hand.
PLus it gives the adults a guilt free way to get away for a night.
2007-10-24 00:01:21 · answer #8 · answered by chattergurl1986 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just invite the kids. Perhaps it is normal and customary for weddings to be a family event in his family. That's how my hubby's family is. So we had tons of kids at our wedding and it was fine. No problems and everyone enjoyed the kids being there.
2007-10-23 21:55:28 · answer #9 · answered by Proud Momma 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I think you two have some differences in expectation.
It sounds like you want a picture-book coronation, and he wants a celebration that both your families can be part of.
Is the wedding about you, or is about the beginning of a marriage?
2007-10-23 21:59:57 · answer #10 · answered by noname 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋