My parents have been seperated since I was about four and I'm 19 now. I'd like to know how to go about getting some answers about things like why they seperated and what brought them together. There's alot of other questions I'd like to ask too. I asked them when I was young but they found them too hard to answer and always avoided it. Now I'm older and a pretty detached person. I get on well with my parents, but find it hard to open up to them, especially my father. How do you think I should get some answers from him? Is it too late? We never go drinking together, so getting a bit drunk first is out of the question. He has a new family now, and I have an eight year old half sister, who I love very much.
2007-10-23 12:39:09 · 7 answers · asked by garion b 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I grew up pretty much with the same type of situation. My suggestion is to sit down with him alone, maybe take him out to lunch. Or schedule a vacation or something just for the two of you to spend quality time, so its not all about intense questions.
2007-10-23 12:51:15 · answer #1 · answered by fivefootnothing78 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is finding out going to make your life any better, or will it bring up some hurts, for both your parents? Some times leaving the past buried is the best. But if you think you must know come right out and ask your mother and father what happened, but don't be surprised if you don't get the same response from them, after all who wants to tell their child that maybe one of them was not a really nice person, after all they love you, and want the same from you, unconditional love.
2007-10-23 13:07:17 · answer #2 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ya know, I wish I knew more about my parents, but they're both gone now. So I don't see anything wrong with taking your Dad to lunch or bowling or something for the two of you and just tell him you'd like to know more about your parents relationship. It's part of your life and memories too and it's a nice thing to know. But remember, it's just information and nothing to be judgemental about.
2007-10-23 12:55:02 · answer #3 · answered by LAL 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure why the answers matter at this point, they fell apart for the same reasons other people do, something like 60% of marriages fail, but it isn't as if there is going to be some "special" reason they broke up that's going to make the world make sense for you. Drop it, and try to make the future work.
2007-10-23 12:46:55 · answer #4 · answered by The Scorpion 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't think of it as "having it out"........have a calm conversation with your father. You are old enough to know some things, however, there are personal issues between two people that they need to keep to themselves. Don't ask questions that you think might be embarrasing or cause your father to be uncomfortable. Be understanding.
2007-10-23 12:45:04 · answer #5 · answered by annvictorblue 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let the past be just that, the past. Your parents were in love once and now their not. But out of their love came you. The end. Now, stop trying to find ways to pry the past out of dad. You said it yourself, ya can't get em drunk...and truth serum is probably very difficult to find..ha. So, work on the here and now. Get to know who dad is at this moment, not when he was probably wearing pukas and smokin' hookas. And give that little sis of yours a hug ! She obviously loves you too!
2007-10-23 12:46:14 · answer #6 · answered by zen 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
follow your experience
2007-10-23 12:59:14 · answer #7 · answered by verySCAREDkid 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋