2007-10-23 11:32:36 · 24 answers · asked by Leyla 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Sure it is. Now, you have an 'out' if he asks you to do something you don't want to. :)
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2007-10-23 11:40:49 · answer #1 · answered by twowords 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Does he really never go to weddings at all? Not even for his family?
Three possibilities:
1. He's afraid that being around a wedding will make you start hankering for the two of you to get married. He doesn't want you "getting any ideas." --> It's a stupid reason, and I would be pissed at him as a result. So, no, it's not okay.
2. He doesn't know anyone at the wedding and feels socially awkward. --> See if you can reassure him based on what you know about the people in attendance. Offer to leave early if he is uncomfortable. My boyfriend has a lot of social anxiety and this was the problem with us once because neither of us knew anyone except the bride and groom, so he felt really uncomfortable.
3. He can't stand the happiness of others and dislikes celebrations --> He's lame and you should dump him.
Essentially, there might be a good reason, but most likely he just isn't being good to you. Part of being in a relationship is going to events together -- particularly events where there is couples dancing. You want to have fun at the wedding -- is he okay with you drinking and dancing with other guys? If so, maybe you should just go on your own. But if he's expecting you to just sit around and be off by yourself while everyone else is dancing with single strangers or their significant others....well then he's trying to have his cake and eat it too.
2007-10-23 18:51:59 · answer #2 · answered by weirdiscomplimentary 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Give the guy a break. When couples go together to weddings, people usually makre dumb remarks like "So, are you two next?" If he's being cautious and not ready to commit to "forever", he's staying away from any situations that might look like a permanent relationship. If you have been hoping for him to pop up with a ring, this is your best clue to the fact that he's not ready. If you have discussed marriage and he's still not "into" going as a couple to a wedding, then be prepared for cold feet.
2007-10-23 18:47:54 · answer #3 · answered by Wifeforlife 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure I understand your question. Are you asking if it's OK to attend a wedding without a date? Yes, it's not only OK it's preferable. Are you asking if it means he doesn't care about you? No it doesn't, it just means that he doesn't want to spend half the day at a party where he doesn't know anyone and won't meet anyone he'll ever see again. Do you mean should you "make" him go with you, because you don't want to go alone? A BIG no. Being too insecure to do things on your own is a great way to lose a friend, especially a boyfriend. No one wants to live their life around catering to your fears and insecurities. In your place, I wouldn't have asked him to go with me in the first place; I'd have insisted that he NOT go and seen to it that he wasn't invited. That way I'd be free to meet and dance with any attractive single man present and be able to enjoy myself with my friends instead of worrying about BF feeling neglected or jealous.
2007-10-23 20:04:20 · answer #4 · answered by kill_yr_television 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let him decide if he wants to go or not. If he is going to be miserable and not have any fun, then you should go by yourself and have fun. THen each of you can have fun doing your own thing and then hang out the next day. How well does he know this friend anyway? If my boyfriend wanted me to go to a wedding and I didn't know the friend then I wouldn't want to go either. Talk to him and see what his reasons are and then just let him make his own decision, don't force him into going or he'll be upset with you for it.
2007-10-24 00:13:26 · answer #5 · answered by Wishing on a Dream 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's not interested in the wedding he shouldn't go and you shouldn't force him or press the issue.
If he has any friends and family, however, he should expect to go to many weddings in his lifetime. Mature adults attend weddings and celebrate with everyone else. Whiny children have a chip on their shoulder and "don't do weddings."
2007-10-23 19:04:42 · answer #6 · answered by Meredith 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think that's okay if he's your boyfriend of over 6 months. After that, he's committed to going to stuff like that ;)
Maybe he doesn't want to be around when you get ideas in your head and start saying "Oh honey, we should do this or that for our wedding"...
2007-10-24 06:38:21 · answer #7 · answered by ForeverAnAngel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you guys have been together for a while then it is not ok for him to not go reguardless of how well he knows the friend. I have guy friends who dont do weddings because they are afraid then the girlfriend will want to get married. If he is not willing to go I thing that is a good sign of future things to come for you two.
2007-10-23 18:54:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think its ok unless it is a really important friend/event to YOU...then whether he "does weddings or not" he needs to go simply becuase you want him with you at that event. I think thats his duty as ur mate. men generally would rather be watching tv then going to a wedding so I dont think thats odd. But it also makes me wonder where else does he not want to go with u? If there are other places maybe u need to be asking if maybe he just doesn't want to be seen out with u for whatever reason. Maybe the issue is deeper than just not liking to go to weddings.
2007-10-23 18:48:53 · answer #9 · answered by boolissa2002 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It depends if it is important to you or not that he comes. If it is important to you, he should come whether he likes weddings or not. That is what a relationship is about - give and take. My guess is that you will have plenty of time to return the favor by going to a boring game, concert or work event you are not in to.
2007-10-23 22:12:58 · answer #10 · answered by PixdeeArtist 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well you can either accept that he doesn't want to go or you can make him go and he will have a bad time. I personally would not want to go to a wedding with someone who is going to be a downer because he/she does not want to be there. If you are allowed to bring a date, bring one of your girlfriends that you know will be a fun time.
2007-10-24 11:19:13 · answer #11 · answered by vaya 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋