Dear Wife:
>>I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.
>>
>>I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show
>>for it. These last two weeks have been hell.
>>
>>Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that
was
>>the last straw.
>>
>>Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a
new
>>hair cut, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new pair of
>>silk boxers. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight
to
>>sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me
>>anymore, you don't want sex anymore or anything. Either you're
cheating
>>on me or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.
>>
>>Your EX-Husband
>>
>>P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to West
>>Virginia together! Have a great life!
>>
>>
>>
>>Dear Ex-Husband -
>>
>>Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true
that
>>you and I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a
far
>>cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown
>>out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work. I
did
>>notice when you got a hair cut last week, the first thing that came to
>>mind was 'You look just like a girl!' but my mother raised me not to
say
>>anything if you can't say anything nice. And when you cooked my
favorite
>>meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I
stopped
>>eating pork seven years ago. I turned away from you when you had those
>>new silk boxers on because the price tag was still on them. I prayed
that
>>it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars
from
>>me that morning ... and your silk boxers were $49.99. After all of
this,
>>I still loved you and felt that we could work it out.
>>So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars,
I
>>quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home
>>you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess.
>>
>>I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said
>>that with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me.
>>
>>So take care.
>>
>>Signed
>>
>>Rich As Hell and Free!
>>
>>P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carla, my sister, was
born
>>Carl. I hope that's not a problem.
2007-10-23 03:14:39 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
You always seem to cheer-up my day.
THANKS!!
2007-10-23 07:07:20 · answer #1 · answered by 'Old & Cudley' 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
10/10
2007-10-23 03:25:27 · answer #2 · answered by Adriana 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Funny! 100!
2016-04-09 23:41:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Schone tag
2007-10-23 03:24:26 · answer #4 · answered by f_buzuku 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha! Funny! 10!
2007-10-23 03:46:29 · answer #5 · answered by cats 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Silk boxers aren't as comfy as you might think!
2007-10-23 03:21:07 · answer #6 · answered by Coach E! 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's the best letter I've read in my life.
2007-10-23 03:20:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
good but a bit long winded
2007-10-23 04:30:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OOPS!!! Now that's Karma for you right there!!! hehehe LOL =D
2007-10-23 03:24:47 · answer #9 · answered by F-1 says KISS IT! 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Funniest thing I have read all day....thank you
2007-10-23 05:16:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol,lol,lol. 10/10. very funny.
2007-10-23 03:18:51 · answer #11 · answered by xyz 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋