my babie is 16 weeks old his dad as neva paid a penny to me or bought him anthink he as neva wanted to see him even though i havegiven him the oppurtunity to on more than 1 occasion the only time he offered me money was en he said i could have money ifi gave him sex, he is no sayin he is goin to take me to court t get acess and th reason for this is he nt to mes my relationship up with my current partner, he tex me or emails me sayin things cu he nos it stresses me which then course me to start on james my partner, i feel likei cannot tak anymore of this and it is really getin me down is there anythink i can do.
2007-10-22 23:53:45 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Anyone who has responsibilities usually has rights. Application is another thing.
2007-10-23 00:00:04 · answer #1 · answered by Barbara Doll to you 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok your ex does have rights to see is child. So if he does present a genuine desire to see his child and be a part of his/her life I can't see the court turning him down. However, I'm sure how much access your ex will be granted will depend on their current situation in life.
Does he have a place to live? Is he in a steady relationship? Is he earning any money? Even if it is yes to all three, I doubt the court would turn around and grant him full custody (if this is indeed what he is trying for!).
If the relationship with your current partner is strong you will be able to withstand this. The most important thing in this situation is your baby and what is best for him/her.
Why don't you try contacting your local Citizen's Advice Bureau for advice? That would be a good place to start. Once you know your legal standpoint, you will be in a better position to take advantage of this situation.
Here's a link to the Citizen's Advice Bureau site: http://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/index/getadvice.htm
2007-10-23 00:11:32 · answer #2 · answered by caretoshare2000 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let him take you to court for access if he wants to.
You have the right to take him to the courts for support & to establish the grounds of any acces he will have.
He has access rights, but if he's abusive & unreasonable you can ask to have those visits supervised by a responsible adult or social services (welfare).
Keep every text you receive & gather all the other contact details you have to prove what he's been doing.
Most certainly don't grant access without the intervention of the courts, or a written agreement drawn up by a lawyer that you have both agreed to.
This man is not one to be trusted.
He will lose overall however, because as soon as this goes to the courts (for his access rights) you can claim for monies from him to suppport your child.
If the abuse, such as demanding sex for maintainance, continues I would consider this a threat to your & your child's safety & report the matter to the Police.
If they take action against him it will serve to his disavantage in any access application.
The courts don't like the kind of behaviour he's resorting to &, because they look to the child's interests first, may use it to block any access until he can show he's he can be trusted to act as a responsible father, rather than a bully.
If you have access to a solicitor, or can get legal aid, I would get legal representation as soon as you can.
This guy's a bully who won't shoulder his responsibilites & you need to ensure you protect yourself & those around you from him.
Over & above all that, talk to your current partner, don't take this out on him & explain what's going on.
Seek his support, but don't let him intervene in anyway. That would totally wreck your case.
In the light of the obvious stress & upset this is all causing you I would suggest you act today, rather than tomorrow or next week.
2007-10-23 00:34:50 · answer #3 · answered by tone 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
let him take you to court, i did with my ex and when we got to court it never went in. I had told my solicitor that he could have him every saturday time to pick him up and drop him back. I also got his mum to do the pick up. He had to show a intrest in his son. He did for a while but them started to make excuses but when i got a new parter and he was being a daddy figure he got worried and really started to make a effort. It is still the same 8years on but dont let it spoil your relationship. He has a new daddy figure now just try to get on with your life he will always be his daddy but you have to still have your life as best you can. What i was told by a women in the court that day was "if you dont laugh you will cry" so i try now to let my ex run my life he is a part of it but a small part?
2007-10-23 00:13:59 · answer #4 · answered by Julie3 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take HIM to court to get child support. Next time he says he is going to take you to court because he wants to see the baby, tell him to go ahead. In the meantime, you need to receive child support since he is the legal father of the baby. States do not like to pay when there is a father in the picture. Don't let him intimidate you with his threats, he doesn't have anything to stand on. What a looser, good thing he is out of the picture. Be selective with the men in your life. There are plenty of good ones out there.
2007-10-23 00:02:23 · answer #5 · answered by Nancy S 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He has the right to be in the babies life, if he is truly the father, but only after you take him to court to work out how much he should pay you for child support. Don' t think you should bother, is not doing whats right for your child. Child support is for your babies benefit and you want to be a good parent right?
2007-10-23 00:07:03 · answer #6 · answered by G Y 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes he has some rights in there, but also if he keeps trying to do this then you need to tell him that your going for child support and do not fall back on this just file and go for it at the lest he is not going to have much after that and it is not fare to the child not to be supported by his/her dad too, that is part of there rights under international laws so go for him then at lest he will have other things to spend his money on other then annoying you all the time
2007-10-23 00:12:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is scum.
Call the CSA and get them to take it out of his wages directly then you won't have to deal with him directly.
Report his soliciting and blackmail to the police... if he goes for custody (highly unlikely) he won't have a leg to stand on.
If you were my sister or daughter I would basically just smash his face in and tell him if he came near you again i'd break both his legs.
2007-10-23 00:10:47 · answer #8 · answered by Edmund 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes he has rights...When you go to court tell the judge what he said...My sister ex husband tried the same thing with her....
Oh and make sure while your there, get court ordered child support....
2007-10-23 00:02:20 · answer #9 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry your grammar was really poor but
this man is doing nothing less than stalking and harassment , i believe u could go to court and get him a restraining order and with today's laws (in the UK) about parents who don't pay maintenance they can face prison sentences.
don't feel your alone with this, what this man is doing is totally unacceptable and he can be stopped
gud luck xx
2007-10-23 07:27:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
if ur a gud mother and u can prove it he cnt get custody. as for his texts ignore it he cnt do anything. itl be in ur favour just dnt think of him n if he keeps stressing u out tell the police. keep ur child safe at all times n dnt trust anyone.
live ur life the way u feel is good and worthwhile for ur child. he is proving u to be a sleep around for money. money aint everything bring ur child up urslef, u dnt need hes money especialy if he want to be satisfied.
tk cr
2007-10-23 00:01:30 · answer #11 · answered by lovely g 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋