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Is there a difference in the feeling? If you're married and have children. Or not married (just living together) and have children? Is there any real difference within the feel of the family? And when the couples break's up is the impact just as equal?

2007-10-22 14:26:08 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Parenting

16 answers

I have 3 children - i had one before we got married and 2 after we got married. i do not think that my family living changed any when we got married. I do think that not being married can sometimes cause a lack of commitment. But if you do break up it will still effect the children in the same way a divorce would.

2007-10-22 14:38:38 · answer #1 · answered by pierronmom 2 · 0 1

I am not married, but together with someone and we have child. We got pregnant exactly 9 months before we were going to get married. lol Our wedding date was the 17th of May, but we found out we were pregnant and due May 8th... I didn't want to be all fat in my wedding photos so the wedding has been delayed.

I'm going to have to say that it doesn't matter at all if a couple is married or not. Many people marry or don't marry and neither of the relationships work out.

My fiance and I feel completely one with each other, we would if we were married or not. Some people change when they get married for some reason. But I'm just going to say that it's just a matter of personal relationships. Each person is different from the next, like every relationship is different.

And as far as breaking up, I'm sure the impact would be the same. If you live with a person long enough to have a child together and all that, a split would be really painful. Both married or not married it's still the same situation. Together with child(ren), then a split... Same thing.

2007-10-22 17:44:28 · answer #2 · answered by Joyous Mommy ♥'s her ßoys 6 · 1 0

There's not a whole lot of difference between married and defacto. The only things I don't have that married friends do is two rings, a photo album and a married woman's social status. Beats me why there's a status difference, but there is. The impact of a break up is exactly the same. It's the breakup of a family that impacts everyone, not two signatures on a divorce certificate. It's no more difficult for married people to break up than defacto couples.

2007-10-22 20:03:22 · answer #3 · answered by Rosie_0801 6 · 0 0

I have been married and unmarried with children. We are currently very happily married and where together for several years prior to. In my situation, being married and being single felt exactly the same. However, I am in a very committed relationship and are very comfortable in the fact the neither one of us is ever going anywhere. Personally, it had no bearing on the feel of a family. Your kids don't know and don't care whether you are married or not. They just need to know that you love them and love eachother. Breaking up on the other hand is a completely different situation. Now you are talking about the possibility of divorce, living in separate households, alimony, child support etc. All of these things are going to have tremendous bearing on the child's family life.

2007-10-22 14:38:12 · answer #4 · answered by wamom 3 · 0 0

.What is a family ? If you are thinking of the traditional family like on "Leave it to Beaver" or "The Nelson Family" those days are gone.Children regardless of the composition of their still call their parents mom and dad ( or mom and mom ,dad and dad or maybe just single parent) regardless if the parents are married or not.Parents do not love their children ,more or less, due to a ceremony.Married couples break up too .Children are loved or unloved due to the type of parents they have ,not their marital status.In any relationship breakup the children are hurt and confused. A marriage licence does not guarantee stability in a relationship (look at the divorce rate).It also does not guarantee that your partner will love you and respect you until death do you part (spousal abuse,cheating etc).It follows a marriage licence does not guarantee that you will be better parents.All that children need is parent(s) that love them, to guide them through their childhood and prepare them for life.You know you've done your best when your child runs up to you and gives you a hug and tells you they love you ( for no reason at all,simply because they love you)What a feeling.

2007-10-22 18:04:05 · answer #5 · answered by gussie 7 · 1 0

Of course the impact is just as traumatic for the couple and the children. There is no difference. Marriage, whether legal or not is a consensual union between two people. The idea of a legal marriage is purely a government invention that has it's benefits as well as it's downfalls. Two people who are not legally married can be as loving and as devoted than legally married couples. I'm married, but I've known unmarried couples with children that are just as committed and bound to each other than any married that I've met.

2007-10-22 14:39:32 · answer #6 · answered by Sptfyr 7 · 1 1

i am married 4 yrs with 3 kids one on the way i think that it is special to be married to each other, you are counted as being together for stuff such as taxes witch can help if you have kids. but if you were to break up being married or not with kids for the same amount of time i do think the impact would be the same and you would have to unless you two could work it out go to court to figure out what is who's and where the kid would go, so in that sense it would be the same.

2007-10-22 14:31:38 · answer #7 · answered by Manda P 3 · 2 0

I would not care what religion the woman was whom my son chose to marry. Of course I would prefer she be a Christian so that they don't have to deal with the problems it could cause, but if they are truly in love with each other they will overcome them. I have been married to a Muslim for a little over a year. We are both adults, but neither of our parents were thrilled with the idea. Once my mother and sister saw how much I loved him, how happy I was and realized how much he loved me that was all they cared about. Once his parents met me and realized I was a good person and a devout Christian who basically followed the same ideals as Islam in regards to devotion, kindness, charity, respect, etc. they fell in love with me as did all his family. Me personally, I would never follow a religion that told me who I could and could not marry because I would see it as a cult instead of God's word.

2016-05-24 21:45:18 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0 0

man yea,I don't live with my g/f or her daughter,thank god. I also have a daughter of my own. It's a tough thing to go through as far as discipline with the 2 children.

My baby is going on 3 and her baby is going on 6,in my 3 years of fatherhood my daughter listens and obeys, and i have never had any problems at home or while shopping.

With the 6 y/o it's nothing but problems.I have tried to reason with this kid with no avail. I also feel like I should issue discipline to her being her own mother will not. As well as her own father by the ways she behaves. I have also made it Clear to my g/f about me not liking her daughter at all as result.

The 6 y/o is one of the most negative people i have met in my 27 years. When they come to my home,she will not say hello to me,demand items,and not listen at all. She will also ball at the drop of a hat. She is in therapy for this ,but it's not helping at all.

I know that this relationship will not last much longer as it's drawing to an end soon.in fact I broke up with my g/f on our anniversary all because of this child's behavior on the day of. i know some will say oh Stoner your a dog for that.

I have a direction for my daughter,the other child is everything i hate about people and against everything I stand for.( you know the whole I'm better than you and your a piece of ****) I do not want my daughter to see this at all. Am I wrong for this? I know it will not work out,that's from the heart,as much as ive tried or can try it will never work out.

2007-10-22 15:01:33 · answer #9 · answered by Stoner 5 · 0 1

I believe that the impact is just as equal. Why wouldn't it be? Kids don't understand the difference of being married or not they just know that both parents are there.

2007-10-22 14:29:26 · answer #10 · answered by orphan annie 5 · 2 1

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