have to say yes? She lives an hour from me and we do not see each other than 2-3 times per year at family occasions. We rarely even talk or email. I don't care for her immediate family either and would not look forward to dealing with them. Can I let her know I just don't think we are that in touch or that I don't have the money (which is true)? Help!
2007-10-22 14:24:56 · 18 answers · asked by reb726 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I think if you dont want to be a Bridemaid you shouldn't. I really think that if you cant make the emotional or finanical commitment you shouldnt! The worst thing for a Bride is to have someone apart if the wedding party who truly can;t be there for them and be excited and happy with her. I have planning many wedding events!! It really does change the Brides mode and effect her wedding!! I have seen a few people feel obligated to say yes and they are the hardest people to deal with in planning the wedding!! it takes a selfless person to put there feelings aside to make sone one day speical and that is a big order when you dont think that you and the Bride are close! simply thank her for considering you and tell her you can't make the commitment! Good Luck!
2007-10-22 14:54:06 · answer #1 · answered by sexychocolatecity21 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you honestly don't want to be part of her bridal party, then don't. You'll end up being more of a burden than of any benefit.
However, you could take this as an opportunity to get to know her. Put yourself in her shoes. It's probable that she doesn't have many good friends, so she's asking you to be in her party. So why not help out a bride and do the best you can? You can be upfront and just say that you don't have a lot of money, but you'd still like to be of help to her. You might not know this, but she might actually really like you and want to get to know you...personally, I'm always keen on keeping people happy and not burning bridges.
On the other hand, if you really don't wish to be her bridesmaid then tell her that you're quite busy, but would be willing to help out in other ways.
Or you can just make up an excuse and accept that you won't be warmly welcomed (if you're invited) to the wedding.
2007-10-22 14:35:08 · answer #2 · answered by miss_j 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you don't have to say yes. From what you said, I wonder why she asked you? I don't know how things work in your family, but the only problem I can foresee with saying no is a possible falling out with family members who disagree with your choice. If that's a problem, it might just be easier to go through with the bridesmaid duties. If you tell her no, I would leave out the part about not caring for her family - I wouldn't even hint about "not being close". Try just to stick to saying you're sorry but you won't be able to to be her bridesmaid - email would be easiest because you can avoid questions.
2007-10-22 14:42:21 · answer #3 · answered by Evie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with her. Say you don't think you are the right person for the job and that finances are not flash at the moment. Tell here you are honoured she asked you and that you hope you find another person to take your place. Wish her well and ask if there is a lesser role you can fulful for her like being an usher on the day. All the best.
2007-10-22 14:51:40 · answer #4 · answered by Mim 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would be concerned about the fallout since she is a family member and stick with the financial burden answer and that it is not a good time for you. the truth is that being a bridesmaid is very expensive between showers, gifts, dress, shoes, accessories and hair. you could spend between $500-800. i also like what someone said about it being an honor to be a guest. this is such a nice way to smooth things over.
2007-10-23 16:10:23 · answer #5 · answered by s.delia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly not. For my wedding ceremony, we did our prepare consultation and dinner Thursday night. everybody got here back to our house for lunch Friday morning/afternoon and then we adorned the reception venue for the reception, which became into on Saturday night. i think of maximum of your bridal occasion will ask in case you want help, otherwise, point out it and that i'm particular they're going to come. My prepare consultation became into at 6pm because of the fact we had some people coming from out of city (this way they could artwork an entire day, or maximum of it.). Our prepare consultation became into half-hour and our dinner reservation became into for 7:30 in the comparable city, to allow for some holiday, site visitors, and pictures.
2016-12-15 06:50:53 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say no politely and firmly. Tell her you are honured and really appreciate being asked but at this time you are not in a position financially to be the best bridesmaid, and as she deserves better, she would be better off finding someone with more time and money who lives closer.
2007-10-22 15:02:40 · answer #7 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't have the money, be honest. But honestly, sometimes family just complicates life! If you're a bridesmaid I don't think you'll have all that much to do that will require your interaction with her family. She and her MOH should do most of the work.
2007-10-22 18:50:23 · answer #8 · answered by Asked and Answered 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she's just asking you so she can even out the numbers or fill some shoes. Just tell her you don't have the money right now but you appreciate the offer (to be nice!).
2007-10-22 14:29:19 · answer #9 · answered by Stimpy 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You dont have to do this if you dont want to.
However she asked you and you say you are not close? I have a feeling she thinks more of you than you expect.
Perhaps she doesnt like the other options she has and wants someone she can count on for her important day.
2007-10-22 14:33:43 · answer #10 · answered by DavidC 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋