I am 18yrs old and i have a bf that shows that he loves me, anything i ask him for he will give me once he has the money. He will do anything for me and a love him very much. BUT, my mom and dad doesn't want me to have a boyfriend. Since lately, i have been warned that if i continue to have sex with him, God will punish me. Am scared because of that!!!! And because of that, i asked my by if he would be ok if we stop having sex (untill we get married) and he wasnt happy about it but he said yes. Am also scared that he will stray and find another girlfriend who can give him sex. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO CAN YOU HELP ME???!!!!!
2007-10-22 10:24:28 · 49 answers · asked by Yellow Butterfly 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Although I'm sure it wasn't easy, you did the right thing by ending the sexual part of the relationship. You should have done it out of respect for yourself and for your relationship with God.
Guys like that are likely to find a girl that will give them the kind of attention that's so important to them right now. You may lose him, but you have to stand by your convictions. What scares me is that is sounds like you don't have any convictions of your own.
If you lose this guy because you are no longer having a sexual relationship then what does that tell you about why he's stuck around this long? And up to this point he's been buying you things? There's a name for women like that where I come from, but I don't think that's what you are. I just think you're a bit naive.
All this talk about doing what you want because you're 18 is really unfair and disrespectful to your parents. You still live under their roof, right? They still feed and support you with the money they earn, right? Please don't dishonor them with the kind of attitude advocated by so many of these other responses to your problem. You don't strike me as a selfish, insensitive person. Don't let the general population make you into one.
2007-10-22 10:29:49 · answer #1 · answered by DJ 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is simple, it's all a matter of you pulling the trigger on this one. Forget about god, your parents and boyfriend for a minute and get your priorities straight. Your 18 so that means your in college or will be in college soon, so focus on that and make it you #1 priority. Just imagine for a second what if you all of a sudden got pregnant a year from now? You will limit yourself to everything you can make for yourself and you will have a hard time regardless of who is supporting you. All those who have sex always run the risk of getting pregnant.
2007-10-22 10:33:48 · answer #2 · answered by inboxj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here...I'll sum this up for you...You're too damn young to be having sex!
I got pregnant when I was 17. That was extremely hard! Quit worrying about how your bf feels. This is your life girl! Sex is not everything. You have PLENTY of time for that! If this boy strays and sleeps with someone else then you don't want him in your life anyway!
2007-10-22 10:31:28 · answer #3 · answered by MeLikey 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you're concerned about remaining in God's will somehow. My wife and I teach sunday school and have Bible studies each week. First, God does not let ANY sin go unpunished so its not just sex out of marriage. But you shouldn't be so concerned about falling out of God's grace because everyone starts off at that place. Instead focus on getting into God's will for your life. Don't take my word for it or anyone else's for that matter, check it out in the Bible. Sex was created by God for our enjoyment, but it belongs in the marriage bed. Anything outside of that will never bring you complete satisfaction.
Find your place in God's will and you will always have peace about every decision you make.
2007-10-22 10:31:05 · answer #4 · answered by Texicano 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he goes away because of that then he wasn't right for you as hard as that may be. A guy who is in a relationship for sex only isn't someone you wanna be with. You shouldn't have to worry about your boyfriend going off with other girls. And has for stopping having sex, it should be up to you. If you're stopping because of your parents maybe you should rethink it. You are 18 so it is up to you, as long as you're being responsible about it.
2007-10-22 10:29:17 · answer #5 · answered by yersocheezy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is the main reason I unquestionably have chosen to living house college my new child with a curriculum from the closest Islamic college (it somewhat is 5 hours away). raising a good, stable Muslimah comes earlier something IMO. of direction i choose her to be clever and able to lead a existence in society, yet coaching her faith is the main undertaking, living in u . s . a .. Edit- properly, i assume i'm uncommon then, lol. i'm a youthful Muslim be certain!
2016-10-04 09:15:34 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should do want you want. I mean you are 18. You don't have to have sex to have a good relationship with someone and god is not going to punish you if you do keep having sex with him. if that was true then we would all be going to hell. At least I know I would!! So I mean if that is what you want. Then do it but he shouldn't be mad if you don't. Well good luck
2007-10-22 10:29:46 · answer #7 · answered by maybeeoneday 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your parents to cite the verse and phrase in the Bible where it says UNMARRIED partners shouln`t have sex!
As far as I know, the Bible does not condemn sex, only adultry! If I were you, I would concern myself more with trusting your boyfriend to wait! There is a lot to be weighed in this decision, but, ultimately it is YOUR choice alone-not your parents. You are legally of age to choose! There are consequences of your actions either way.
2007-10-22 10:35:40 · answer #8 · answered by Steve M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
god made us sexual creatures for a reason, u shouldnot feel guilty for wanting to be close to your boyfriend like that! God also is not spiteful and wont punish you for doing something that is natural and part of life. if you love ur boyfriend you should share that special connection with him because it is such an important part of a relationship...think about it...not everyone knows u on that level that he does! just be really careful, aka birthcontrol or condoms...and enjoy being close to the one you love. i think ur parents are just looking out for you and they dont want you hurt or have babies before its the best time for u. ......but if u also want to wait, and ur boyfriend loves u and he is the ONE....he wont stray! and if ur really worried...talk to him about it. thats the best way to control ur fears. good luck! i hope you find what works best for you.
2007-10-22 10:33:51 · answer #9 · answered by jen-jen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if he will stray and find another girlfriend just bc u are not having sex with him, that means he dosnt really love you, he loves sex. But i dont think that God would punish u just because ur having sex w ur boyfriend before marrige....., tons of ppl do that.
2007-10-22 10:29:32 · answer #10 · answered by Betalynn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋