im a 16 year old boy why do i feel like no one cares for me besides God, i mean i know they do but i just.....

Question

feel like like im letting everybody down and that i cant do anything right is it just a phase im going through?? or puberty?? or something else i feel like i supposed to act like a grown man should, which makes me think twice about playing outside and stuff like that because a grown man wouldnt do that, but the thing is im not ready to become a man yet i want to play outside and do pranks and stuff that kids do what the heck is wrong with me and no im not going to commit suicide or go cut myself or anything like that i just want to know if its puberty or just a regular 16 year old boy plz help me

Answer 1

It can be a combination of both.

At around 16 years old is a confusing time for a lot of people. It is confusing because they don't know who they are and because they don't know who they are, they try to fit in with the adults who supposedly know who they are. So, they try on the "adult image," trying to act mature and stuff, which doesn't feel right to them because they are not being genuine to themselves.

I've been there as probably most of the world has as well (I know it doesn't make you feel better to hear this.)

One thing I can suggest is: be yourself and don't worry about the pressures of the world. The world expects a lot out of people, yet the truth is, the people that expect a lot from you are the people who have failed to meet the same expectations that they expect others to meet.

Another truth: There is no such thing as an "adult," in terms of how you should behave or act. If you don't believe me, go find older people who behave like children. Yet, there is no behavior like "children" also. Some people are so free in terms of their behavior, not being concerned how others judge them, that they are comfortable being who they are, and because they are comfortable being who they are, they are often labeled as "children" or "people who haven't grown up yet," or "child-like," because they see the same resemblance in terms of the freedom to be in small children. They act themselves and genuine, until others teach them that it's not okay to do so.

Most of the people of the world fall into their trap of others' expectations. The question is: Do you have to?

Being genuine and truthful and integrous to who you are is more important than trying to be who you're not.

People think that one cannot be free and responsible and accountable at the same time; yet i say, one can only be truly accountable and responsible if they are being who they are; if they are being genuine and true to themselves. Then, they can proceed to be responsible, and being accountable for their true behavior.
It's the worst to pretend to be who you're not, and then try to be accountable for such behavior (you won't want to be, because you were not even genuine in that behavior in the first place.)

Don't worry about the world and what they expect of you. As long as you are true to yourself, you are fine.

Playtime doesn't stop when you're an adult. I still have fun with my friends, and we play and run and tackle one another and have fun. The people that have stopped having fun, are the ones who have been eaten up by others' (world's) expectations of them. It's not fun to live that way.

Don't let others tell you otherwise. Don't be false to yourself and everything else will be fine. Let go and simply be yourself (What's life if you can't even be yourself?)

Answer 2

Yes it is puberty stuff your not yet a full grown man yet you are not a child . Its a very hard emotional stage . A stage is just that and it will all change for the better.Just do your best to ride it out. If you want to Play than play , If you think you need to act like a man in a situation than act like a man you are able to do both so it can be fun as well as confussing. You did the right think by asking heep asking. It sometimes seems like you cant do anything right but if you are questing this than you are doing something right . Keep your chin up. Your not letting anyone down their is alot expected of everyone and from time to time we all feel that way. weather it be a boss of a family memember or a friend it happens. and if you think you let them down than tell them I think I let you down and see if it is true. If yes than ask how can I make it up to you . Its not the end of the world . Everyone lets people down all the time.

Answer 3

I'd say you're totally normal. Although you try to do things right, sometimes it's just the people around you. I feel that way too and I'm 36! :-) I feel like just when I get a handle on things, then someone is there telling me that I'm doing something else wrong. The truth of the matter is, I only have so many hours in the day to think about doing things, you know? You still have to have your fun.

If you feel that there's no one in your world who is giving you positive feedback, have you thought about joining clubs or associations at school? Through your Church? There are people who would LOVE to have you around to do some things, and you would benefit because you feel like you're doing things right as well.

Sometimes parents are well-meaning, but they make you feel like you're doing everything wrong and that you don't know how to act. I can tell you from experience that you are NOT a man. If you were my child, I'd want you to THINK that you should be acting like a man, just because I would want you to learn that you need to be a grown person. It's okay to want to go out and do pranks at your age...so long as they don't hurt anyone or get you arrested! :-)

Hang in there and I hope things work out for you in the end.

Answer 4

Harumph!

The poet Leonard Cohen has said, tellingly, I feel, that western culture extends an invitation to males to remain children LONG! after it's appropriate or practical. It's irsome to see the culture refer to someone 24 as 'just a kid.' Growl! At what point does a guy cease playing, we wonder? It's a sign of tremendous (and usually undeserved) privilege to reject responsibility. It also presumes someone 'other' (means women) will continue to assume a disproportionate share of responsibility and work. How fair is that?

Still, most 16-year-olds in the culture are not yet sufficiently educated or skilled to earn a living wage or live independently, which pretty much means you reside in what I call the Vortex of Criticism. This is a dark place where everyone is allowed and even encouraged to correct you in absolutely everything. When you are 16, everyone seems to be entitled to share a critical opinion of some aspect of your person. Also, at 16, you've already had years and years of this. Try as you might you can't zone it out. They will only relay the message louder. One suggestion: Ask at home if they will at least endeavor to balance criticism with the occasional word of praise. School you can't control but at home you should be able to set a few parameters. Remind them of all the right, stand-up things you do and ask for occasional appreciation. Offer some in return, too. Giving praise/appreciation is as good as getting it, and recognizing this is a big step toward emotional maturity.

Answer 5

Honey you are 16, you need to be 16 and not a grown man, there's plenty of time for that. I'm glad you're not suicidal. A lot of what you're feeling is very normal for your age. You are at a weird age, you have a man's body and a "boy's" mind, that's bound to cause some confusion! Also, plenty of grown men play outside, they play sports, etc, there's nothing wrong with it as long as you're taking care of whatever you're responsible for at that time. Stop being so hard on yourself and talk to someone who loves you! Is there a man around that you trust? He can tell you that he's been through the exact same thing.

Answer 6

I think being a teenager is a very confusing time, and you are under a lot of stress from all directions - your parents to always do what they say, your school to always get good grades, your male friends to always be a "ladies man", and God knows what else in addition to already worrying about college and a career.
It's a tough time, just do your best and believe in yourself. Pray, that helped me a lot. I didn't have a regular girlfriend until I was 20 because I was shy and unsure of myself (still am to some extent and I'm 45!)
So, welcome to the real world. If you feel like going out and playing do it! You're only young once! Just don't break any crap that doesn't belong to you - that's not cool ("You kids, get off of my lawn!"
PS: Being shy often means you are not an idiot. Sorry, you can't change that.

Answer 7

I think you should just calm down! It's okay. Everybody cusses at some point in their life whether they actually say it out loud or not. It's fine. It sounds to me like the boy you're talking about, your son? should be rinsing his mouth out with soap for cussing you for not buying him hundred dollar shoes. I mean who has to have hundred dollar shoes? I just bought a pair the other day for 43.oo and have been punishing myself ever since because that was too much. So don't worry about it, you might have actually struck a chord in him and maybe he won't be so eager to run over you next time. Good luck and if you feel really bad to God then just say I'm sorry, you only have to repent once for each sin and as long as you mean it, then you're forgiven. He died for all of our sins and yours is not that bad by any means.

Answer 8

It is regular
But like, do you think grown ups dont have fun...
Not having fun just makes you boring.
Go out there and have fun.
At your age, you should be going out there to the mall, the movies, the beach, the park, to the bowling alley, etc etc... Enjoy everything around you. Adulthood will just come to you when you're ready, when you have to go to college.. when you get a job. You don't HAVE to act like an adult, because you're not. You're not yet a man, you're still a teenager, sweety. Kids play on the mud and cry when they fall. Grown ups work, and ***** about their wives/husbands. Right now all you gotta do is care about your friends, school, and family. And most of all, care about having the most fun!
You dont have to care for anybody, just yourself... So you're not letting anyone down, just by caring, you're doing enough, honey :)

Answer 9

You are only 16 years old. You are supposed to have fun, play outside, hang out with friends. Never try and grow up too fast. The best years of your life can pass you by and you wont know it until it is too late, and then you will be telling yourself why didn't you just be a kid.

Your feelings are normal. You have to learn by your mistakes, and the only way to do that is to make them. Sometimes you will let people down, but in the end it just makes you a stronger person, and you will know what kind of person you don't want to be.

Just keep your head up and make sure you have fun. Life is supposed to be fun, and it was never meant to be hard.

Answer 10

Im 17 and i felt the same way last year. Its a teenage thing i think. Dont let anyone bring you down. Be strong.. Thats what i did. Dont grow up to fast thats another thing i did. Im 17 in college with a fiancee. Go outside and have fun. Im a 16 year old girl its a defferent. But i know how you feel just be strong everything will get better i promise dont grow up too fast. Just take ur time and have FUN