I work in an office and am a loans manager for a large company. Im 47 years old and been divorced for 7 years i have 2 sons aged 10 and 12, they live with their mother. The thing is a new secretary started at the firm recently, she's 23. She has an amazing body, very curvy and wears some sexy outfits. She was in my office the other day and was looking for a file for my colleague she stretched up and i was looking at her breasts i looked at her and she was looking at me! I immediately looked away, i felt very embarassed. Though she still smiles at me and says 'hello', in fact she's started chatting with me alot more since then, she's very intelligent. She's only been with the company 3 months and seems a lovely girl! If only i was 15-20 years younger id ask her out. I do fantasise about her. I just hope she understands i didnt mean to stare at her, will she? I dont look too bad for my age but feel she must think im a dirty old man. I wish i wasnt so attracted to her.
2007-10-22 09:28:12 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
hopefully she knows guys will be guys. Attracted to her is a BAAAAAD idea. You know that.
2007-10-22 09:31:22 · answer #1 · answered by wizjp 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not a perv. You're a man! All men look, it's a force of nature. I am one of those woman that have come to terms with the fact that my significant other will look at other women's boobs/butt, that's human nature. 23 is pretty young, in terms of her understanding the whole "man looking at woman is human nature" standpoint. But oh well, you didn't do anything wrong at all. It's not like sexual harassment or anything. And if she is interested, then that's great. I don't think there is anything wrong with 2 consenting ADULTS no matter their ages. My step-mother is 4 years older than me and it doesn't bother me at all. A lot of the time in those situations, the younger person in the relationship is more mature for their age. NOT ALL SITUATIONS, but from my own experience, I think my step-mother acts 20 years older than me, LOL. So no, you are not a perv! Okay? I hope that helped.
2007-10-22 09:37:00 · answer #2 · answered by dawnangel1981 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chances are you're not the first male to do this to her, which means she IS probably very attractive, which in a way is understandable on her part if she catches a male looking at her. Try not to let her catch you anymore, and IF she does think this about you, then it would probably change her outlook of you. Also, if didn't completely blow you off and still talks with you, she might have thought you to be that A LITTLE, but probably nothing more than what she normally gets. At least you didn't touch her... hey and if it seems she might be getting in to you, you SHOULD ask her out, you never know. I've known of A LOT of relationships with a younger woman/older man. It's kind of a turn on to be with an older man actually, from a young woman's perspective :)
2007-10-22 09:34:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Perhaps you shouldn 't feel so guilty about the whole thing. Flirting is fine but just remember not to break the whole relationship at work thing. Also if you are considered a Manager there it is best not to broach sexual harrassment. She being so young most likely has not pondered the ethics of the dilemma. I'm 29 and have been working in the office environment for 10+ years now and was doing so while in College/University. She most likely has only been in the office environment for 3-4 years if she went to University. Workplace ethics are key.
2007-10-22 09:33:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd take the fact that she is talking to you "alot more since then" as a positive sign.
I would think if she thought you were a perv, she'd avoid you.
She knows you find her attractive (you were checking her out and got caught).
So there is an age difference. Get to know her as a friend and see if there is more there than the physical. You never know what could happen.
If things progress, ask her out to "something safe" like coffee or lunch. If it continues, go for dinner.
Maybe she just found the attention to be good. But nothing ventured, nothing gained.
2007-10-22 09:36:29 · answer #5 · answered by Hawk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about it. If she truly thought u were a perv. she wouldn't continue to talk to u. she would avoid you like the plague if anything, especialyl if you continue to stare.
Forget about it and more on.
Although on the other hand.. not to confuse you in anyway. But some women are attracted to older males. She may have a thing for you. However, i would play it cool and see how she reacts in the mean time. And also be careful who you listen to on here. Im not saying i'm great at advice.. but a lot of ppl on here are still in high school.
Good Luck
2007-10-22 09:34:15 · answer #6 · answered by Krystina 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK I'm 23 years old very cute too and I would not feel offended for what you did actually it happens to me all the time at work with old men's to but i like older men's I'm dating a 43 year old men.If she is chatting with you that means she likes u come on go on send her some flowers it never fails then ask her out don't tell her u send the flowers just give her like a clue it will be interesting come on u just a men and she is pretty.I think she likes u if she still talks at you after that let me know what happened.
2007-10-22 09:37:51 · answer #7 · answered by Bonita C 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
At least you acknowledge that it was inappropriate to stare. If it comes up, just tell her the truth. You weren't trying to make her uncomfortable. Tell her she is a beautiful woman and your impulses got the best of you, but that you respect her as an intelligent colleague and wouldn't want to do anything to insult her.
That being said, I don't want to say "she has it coming" necessarily, but women that wear sexy clothing to the workplace usually do it because they enjoy being looked at. I doubt she's offended.
2007-10-22 09:33:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's honestly general. Lot's of people our age (i'm 14) are bi-curious. there is not something to be ashamed approximately. My 12 12 months previous bff is bi. of direction, for the reason which you're youthful this could be a faze. while you're, that's great! It merely capacity you have greater ideas ;) P.s. If everyone makes exciting of you, do not forget which you're captivating and enjoyed!! <3 wish I helped you :)
2016-11-09 05:19:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that since she wears sexy outfits she got the effect that she was going for. If she thought you were a pervert, or someone she didn't want to have anything to do with she wouldn't even be anywhere near you. Sounds like you're good!
2007-10-22 09:32:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
She wears the sexy outfits. She wants you to look. She gets off on the attention she draws from all the guys, not just the younger ones.
2007-10-22 09:32:47 · answer #11 · answered by friendlyadvice 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋