My bf of 6 months and I recently broke up (we're both 25). We had backed off a little a month or so ago because he felt like we should slow down, but we were still intimate and still hung out and talked all the time. I foolishly thought that meant something. Finally when I talked to him about getting back together he said he's super attracted to me and has a great time with me, but doesn't want a serious relationship right now. (He's going to europe for a few months and loves to just hang out with the guys) He said he can see himself getting really attached to me and isn't ready for that.
WTF. I don't get it... if you are attracted to someone, have great chemistry with them, and enjoy spending time with them, why would you back off like that? Is not wanting to be in a serious relationship a real excuse, or is it a cop-out? I'm sad and I'm taking it very personal. Do you think if it really is a commitment thing, or is he letting me down easy?
2007-10-22 04:41:37 · 12 answers · asked by Leah 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This was 2 weeks ago and we haven't spoken since. We usually talk or text every day, even when we were on a break. Do you think he's found someone else? I haven't made any attempt to talk to him or see him.
2007-10-22 04:42:11 · update #1
I'm not chasing him... I have not spoken to him or tried to at all. I am just curious.
2007-10-22 04:46:50 · update #2
eeeeeegh shitty!!! You'd think that at 25 he wants to get real and stop playing sh*t games. Like I think it's so hard to find great looks and personality in a guy so if I find that I will want to date the guy. Guys seem to think who cares I want to party first and who cares if I found the best girl...the girl can wait.
But, I think this guys telling the truth.Because he sees potential in you ("sees himself getting attached to you") he doesn't want to get any closer. Because no matter what- he's going on that trip to Europe and he's gonna party with his boys (that prob means sex n other girls) and he can't do that with you in the picture.
This is sooo shitty and I'm sorry it's happening to you!! Be strong and cut off communication. Move on girl!
2007-10-22 05:14:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't allow yourself to be with someone who has made it clear that he wants to be single. If a shallow relationship is all you're looking for, then great. But if you want a relationship that has any kind of future, it sounds like this is not the guy for you. At least not at this stage in his life. You're probably more mature than he, and I'm sure there are thousands of guys who would be lucky to have you in their lives. As far as him possibly having another girlfriend, it may be true and it may not, but the fact is he's not the one for you. Try not to take it personal (though it's hard). Time will help heal your heart. In the meantime, do something for yourself. Be with your girlfriends. Go out and exercise. Do things that make you happy. I promise you'll feel better in no time!
2007-10-22 05:05:15 · answer #2 · answered by Zoom 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a real excuse, but I still think you should move on. Don't waste your time on a guy who isn't going to give you what your looking for. If you want a serious relationship, then you also need a guy who wants that as well... otherwise it is going to be a lot of frustration and pain from not getting what you need in your relationship. Sorry and good luck.
2007-10-22 04:47:08 · answer #3 · answered by Kamunyak 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He could be telling the truth or he may be just trying to let you down easy. Only he knows for sure. Some people prefer not to get tied up in serious relationships during certain times in their life, and others use that excuse to move on but then a week or so later you see or hear about them with someone else on their arm.
Either way it's plain that a relationship with you isn't his choice right now so try to move on and let your heart heal.
2007-10-22 04:45:15 · answer #4 · answered by . 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Be glad that he's telling you upfront that he doesn't want a commitment right now. You both are still young and even though he's attracted to you and seems to care, he wants to leave the door open to meet different people. Keep yourself busy and if it was meant for the two of you to be together, it'll happen eventually, but don't wait for him.
2007-10-22 04:50:04 · answer #5 · answered by peaches6 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he could have found someone else.. not wanting a serious relationship could be a real excuse but I dont see how he is super attracted to you and not wanting to get back together. Maybe he is afraid of commitment
2007-10-22 04:48:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he really just isn't ready for a full on commitment, be glad he told you and wasn't messing around behind your back. Gotta give the man credit for being honest.
2007-10-22 04:47:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may have found someone else. Men do love to make excuses, unfortunately. I would just move on, he wasn't the one for you. This guy took you for granted, and Mr. Right won't need to take a break from you! Bets wishes!
2007-10-22 04:46:35 · answer #8 · answered by j c 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry honey, but if he loved you, he wouldn't let you go. Move on - to a real man. Not a kid.
2007-10-22 04:58:11 · answer #9 · answered by True Blue Brit 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
STOP chasing him. He sounds like he's trying to tell you it's just about OVER.
2007-10-22 04:45:46 · answer #10 · answered by cooter726 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋