my mother isnt open minded about anything she doesnt know or hasnt done herself basically if she hasnt done it she thinks its wrong like i was talking to her about adoption and she is totally against it she said she believes in god but i dont see how thats against god because adoption is giving people who cant have kids a chance to enjoy parenting. That and my brother is gay and he has tried to tell her and i know that may be against god but she doesnt beleive people can be gay she keeps saying he doesnt know what he is talking about. That and she thinks everybody but her family are bad people she always has negative things to say about everyone and its really getting to me cuz i love my mom but i dont think she is being very christian how could i help her to open her mind and enjoy life instead of being so closed up to what she doesnt and who she doesnt know
2007-10-22 01:49:08 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your mom is very close-minded.
I look at it this way, it is your life so do what you think is right and don't worry so much if your mom accepts it or not.
You have to do what is best for you and your immediate family.
I had a similiar situation where my brother and wife could not conceive so they went the artificial route and had beautiful twins. We have an aunt who is "god loving and god fearing" and thinks what they did was "horrific" and thinks that they all will "burn in hell" for their choice.
Lets just say that this aunt is not invited to too many family functions anymore due to her constant spewing of negativity.
In one other instance, my brother had a great job opportunity but it meant that he had to move out of state and half way across the country. Well, my mom was very "disappointed" and tried to talk him out of it so my brother was torn (they also got some grief from my sis-in-law's family too).
I said to my brother, take yourself and immediate family (wife and kids) and look hard in the mirror for a moment... Then, make the decision that is best for YOUR family.
He moved two weeks later and has made it a better life for them.
So, take that advice and look real hard in the mirror because that is the person that you need to deal with foremost and if you feel that what you are doing (or have done) is in your best interests, then it does not matter what anyone else thinks.
Good luck and godspeed!!!
2007-10-22 02:05:06 · answer #1 · answered by JJT34 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't control what other people do or think, only yourself. Alot of people my age were brought up to believe what our parents did, especially about cultural and social norms. My parents were raised to believe certain things about different races, religions and cultures and that's what they taught us. However, through more education and exposure to life, my brothers and sisters and I were able to draw our own conclusions and raise our children differently. Some of my brothers and sisters embraced what my parents believe. I did not and I raised my daughters very differently. So our 3rd generation, the grandkids are even farther removed from what my parents believed and as they have their own children(most are adults now), more and more of past beliefs become diluted and forgotten.
Think for yourself. Whenever you argue/debate anything always have a concrete reason why you think this. "I believe in adoption because it gives children who are unwanted a chance to be in a loving, nurturing family that will help them grow up to be good people". Always know why you believe something.
Respect your mother for her way of life and her beliefs(if you can, don't tolerate hate), but spend your energies on learning about yourself and developing your own belief system.
2007-10-22 09:44:05 · answer #2 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard when your parents are negative. Focus on positive attributes about her. Try not to let her bring you down. When she acts negative... try to change the subject to something more neutral. I think adoption is a wonderful thing to do... good luck... As far as your brother... try to give him extra support.
2007-10-22 10:05:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like she is miserable. You know what they say....misery loves company. She is close minded and with people like that you cannot change them. Put your efforts somewhere else. Like having a family you can nurture and love. I agree with you. She is being very un christian like
2007-10-22 09:15:45 · answer #4 · answered by natasha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her believe whatever she wants and do your own thing.
2007-10-22 09:26:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should just give up thats what i would do
2007-10-22 08:55:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋