Need to get away from my parents!?

Question

Im very unhappy with my life at the moment. Im 23 years old and live with my parents and we really are not getting along at the moment, on top of that i have had a very difficult year. I have been out of work/further education for the first time in my life for a few months now. This is because i have been quite depressed for the past few months, before you judge i have been a happy person 95% of my life but have not been so recently. One of the things i am really unhappy about is living with my parents they are on my back 24/7, apart from my dad working 9-4 and my looking after my 2 nieces they both have not much of a life. There life is me and my sister which they view through a magnifine glass. The house i live in is not a very happy and social house and one thing that i particualy hate is the fact i never truely get my own space, my parents are in the house all the time, which makes me so unhappy as i just need some space on my own to get things together.

Answer 1

You pretty much answered your own question.

Answer 2

I kind of know how you feel; I'm 21, have lived in boarding school and then University for over half my life, so now (for the first time in over a decade) I'm having to live at home again. Only, I have no family left really, it's just me and my mum nowadays, and I have no money to visit my sister. On top of that, my mum moved while I was at Uni, so I don't know anyone where I am now, and I'm finding it really difficult to make friends since all everyone does is drink around here. There really isn't much else to do, and it's very lonely.
The truth is, I've found that I actually have a lot more than a lot of other people, and I'm starting to appreciate it. I've had a good start in life, I'm well educated, and I know I can go far. I'm missing my friends, I'm missing my Dad, and I have missed the opportunity to start a relationship with the most amazing girl I've ever met... but I don't care. I know I will go far, and I am determined to make my mark, so I'm just going with it. After all, there will be some things you miss when you leave!
Remember, just try to be happy, as happiness is the key to everything. Sadness and irritability breed mistrust, and this is what we see so often nowadays. Just think, are you following your destiny? If so, you and your heart are being sorely tested along the way. However, this is necessary for you to prove how worthy you are of your fate.
OK I know how bad it is having to share a house with your parents and all the rest of them, you're 23! However, remember that these are your mum and dad - you are still their child as far as they can see. The younger ones really look up to you I'll bet, and they must all love having you around!
Just explain to your parents that you appreciate them putting you up, but you are used to a different way of life, and it may sometimes feel claustrophobic to you what may often feel comfortable to them. Don't worry though - stay on the path, and you will be alright in the end, you will find what you are looking for! =oD

Answer 3

first you need to get a job. Even if your in school you should at least work part time. Save your money . Thank your parents for supporting you. then move out .As for now you want your own space... don't you have a bedroom to yourself? That's your space learn to be happy in it. You will never be at peace until you enjoy being with yourself, at least sometimes. You are waisting your time with your nieces... you don't say how old they are but as all truly wise people know " LIFE IS SO MUCH BETTER WHEN VIEWED THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHILD. If you are this unhappy, just think how life must suck for them, knowing...and they do know, how unhappy you are. The best way to get out of a depressed state is to go do something positive for someone else. It's more productive and less costly than drugs. Get those girls and do something with them. Go to the park, teach them all those cool tricks you used to do. be their spotter, make sure they don't get crazy and get hurt. If their older maybe you could help with homework. When my daughter , has a lot of reading to do for class, we do it together, she reads out loud a bit , then we talk about what we read. Then I read a bit and again we talk. This works for both of you ...improving reading, listening, comprehension skills. You won't always agree on what is an important fact and what is not, so it will also develop debate and negotiation skills... and IT'S FUN! Ask them what they like to do and maybe involve their friends in board games or shooting hoops or my favorite...loofa wars in the back yard. 3-5 loofahs per player and the throwing begins... as in all wars their is no winner, but unlike real war it's good exercise and you never know...all great pitchers started somewhere (no. it doesn't hurt to get beened with a loofah). You sound like a really nice person and I hope I've helped. Remember the prize is not really at the end of the trip... the prize is the adventures you had and the memories you make while getting there. Make your life an adventure , make a point of smiling and say hello to at least three people you don't know every day. Talk to at least one person you've never spoken to before...even just to ask how's it going and then respond to them. I guarantee you will feel better about yourself and then you can gain a better control over the other aspects of your life.. PEACE TO YOU !

Answer 4

I think you should get help for your depression. Counselling or whatever you need.

Also put your CV up on one of the online recruiting sites such as Monster etc. Work is important for your mental health. It gives you routine and theres also the social side to work. You make friends and interact with others. Believe me a good days work will make you feel much better than moping around the house all day.

Move out. As soon as you get enough cash. Living at home at 23 is contributing to your depression because maybe you think you're a failure living at home at 23 when you should have a job and your own place. My sister and my mum were at loggerheads before she moved out 2 years ago. Now they have the best relationship because they both have their own space.

If you have a degree or some sort of qualification im sure you'll get a job easily.
Good luck

Answer 5

The only way for you to get out of this situation is with a plan. It sounds as if you are drifting through life without any goals. If you truly want to leave your parents' home, (and you should at age 23) you need to start with a job. Without money you are stuck. You need to write down what you want to do, and how much money you will need. Make a plan, and stick to it. Anybody would be unhappy in the situation that you are in. You are too young to be letting your life pass you by. Your parents may never be the ones to motivate you, because they may not want you to move out. So, you have to motivate yourself. Ask yourself what you want, and then ask yourself how you can get what you want. Now, get started.

Answer 6

Nice, blame the people that are keeping a roof over your head. Be sure and save your thoughts for after the time they go home to the Lord. You simply need to take responsibility for your happiness. If living at home is making you unhappy, then obviously you need to move. Go and see how many of your friends are willing to support you. Now go and thank your parents for not tossing your unemployed hide out on the street, get a job and move out.

Answer 7

Oh, I suggest getting a part time job or an overnight job so that way you are at home at the time that your dad goes to work, It will keep the tension down and you can make/ save money too. Either that or take evening classes at the community college. Make time for your self away from the house like going ti the local library and reading. Walking in the park, etc... believe me it relieves stress.

Answer 8

Nothing is keeping you there. Get a minimum-wage job and an apartment with roommates and be free of your parents while you continue to look for an education-appropriate job.

Your quality of life is definitely better at home, but whatever you think is best. Give your parents a break... you've been gone for several years and they missed the part where you weren't a teenager who needs constant supervision anymore. My parents babied me after college until my wedding day when I left their home. It's just what (good) parents do.

Answer 9

Have you a friend that you could go and live with? Or consider moving out with a group of friends all together (cut the costs a bit!)

Otherwise - talk to them! Tell them how you feel and like the other person said - make somewhere your own space!

Answer 10

I'm sorry but you are acting like a spoilt brat. you cant have your cake and eat it when its convenient for you, stop feeling sorry for yourself and pick yourself up. i understand about depression had it in the family for years, it will destroy your if you don't do something about it, you seem to complain about nearly everything but don't get off you back side and do something, sit down and write out all the negatives and all the positives about your life that way you will be able to prioritise what you need to do next, join a club, play a sport, go for a walk to clear your head, confide in a friend it helps to talk, I'm sorry if it seems I'm patronising but Ive seen this first hand and its ruined members of my family, you only get one stab at life take it with open arms and embrace it, good luck and hope all goes well for you.

Answer 11

Parents look at this like your still under their roof, no matter how old you are, they feel they can treat you how they want. My question to you is this. Are you trying to save up $$ to move out? If you don't have anything saved up, start saving NOW! I know it is hard to live at home when you are this age, you want to have your "own space" and want to make your "own decisions". You can have that while you are there, they need to respect that. Talk to your parents, let them know how you feel, ask them to please give you space. Do not give attitude and don't raise your voice, you need to be careful with your tone when talking to them. Hopefully they will be respectful and realize that your not 5 anymore and that you can be responsible.