Here's the background: we dated for two years (i'm 20, he's 22), and now have a 6week old baby together but I am now living with my parents and he is really not involved (showed up after she was born and at 5 weeks for a couple hours). I moved home because he wouldn't take financial responsibility and get a good enough job so he could afford all his personal expenses as well as contribute to our living expenses. Most months I paid a lot of his bills (inc. car payment). With a baby on the way I couldn't afford to pay for her as well as him - i'm a full-time student with virtually no income of my own but I always managed to pay for food, rent, utilities each month.
Anyways, he said he loves me and up until this point I did want to work things out (afterall the main problem was him not acting like an adult) given he'd get a good job. He came down at 5weeks and tried to get me to have sex with him and I said no b/c we're not dating and I'm not a slut - then he left without...
2007-10-21 02:06:44 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
without even giving me a hug or saying goodbye to me - in fact he didn't even look at me when he left and said I'll call you later maybe or maybe not I donno I have lots going on. Is he intentionally trying to hurt me because I couldn't accept not having enough food to eat and things as they were and moved home? I am pretty certain he's been with other girls since we've been apart(3mo now), so it's not like he's desperate for sex or what not. Or is he just being a jerk and only thinking about himself? I've never been made to feel so bad before in my life - I mean that's like treating me like a prostitute...
Guys, please enlighten me as to what could be going through his head- I have no clue.
2007-10-21 02:11:28 · update #1
I haven't pressed child support yet because for 1. he can't and won't pay it now, and 2. because it would be the smallest amount possible and right now I don't need the money. I do save every receipt tho so if later I need help I will ask for it
2007-10-21 02:18:39 · update #2
In USA you and he are both responsible for child support, since you have custody, some support must come from him.
So see a lawyer and get this thing settled once and for all. He may demand visitation rights with the child. Depending on the situation and the location he is responcible for the support for at lest 18 year and may be up to 23 years.
Whatever happens or happened between you and him is between two of you.
You wrote,"Anyways, he said he loves me and up until this point I did want to work things out (after all the main problem was him not acting like an adult) given he'd get a good job".
Jobs are not easy to find but you wanted to work things out , so allow time do not engage in any behaviour that will create more financial responsibility, like having another child with any one.
You are in school so stay in school, do not give up, finish it, no matter what.
Make sure if he visits you or baby, make sure you have some one with you also besides you, him and the baby.
Please read my article on the subject.
*********************************
General Advice to Young People
By
Minootoo
This is my general advice to all.
You sound very young and if you are under 30, then study hard if in school or college, stay and finish it.
Build a carrier, youth comes but once take full advantage of it. Study hard, play some enjoy friendship, and then at age 30 if still unattached then try the sites like.
yahoo.shadii.com
jivansathii.com
2007-10-21 02:30:18 · answer #1 · answered by minootoo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya know what? I think you've been too nice to that guy, and he is a jerk and an idiot. No matter what has happened between you two, he still owes child support for that precious child he fathered. You didn't mention child support, so please call an attorney, or file with your state to nail him. He walks around care free while you care for the baby. Hon, he doesn't love you. He's a loser.
2007-10-21 02:15:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG, what a loser.Don't give him anything...nothing!
He is more of a baby than the baby.Until he starts sending money to you to help with baby expenses I'd have nothing to do with him.He is a lazy bum.You take care of you and baby.Stay in school also..very important.Sounds like you have very supportive parents.
2007-10-21 02:16:38 · answer #3 · answered by waterlover 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I probable shouldn't touch this one yet i flow to. i flow to be straightforward. Assuming your maximum suitable pal wasn't already friends w/ him through fact perhaps you purely had one or 2 mutual friends and distinctive center communities, he became utilising you as a jealousy ingredient for the different female. good subject she stated no, considering the fact which you will have lost 2 friendships of course. different subject is: perhaps he concept he cherished you through fact he observed you and the different chick putting out and found out, "howdy, i like this female" yet then observed which you weren't the comparable while it became basically you 2 and he found out he cherished your pal. Sorta the comparable subject did i basically get out of myself. i found out i wasn't in love with my lady pal from now on and broke off a 9-month relationship. It became difficult yet all of us persevere. Stick in there, toddler. he's no longer the top of the international. you will discover the top of the international later in life, i promise.. and that i do no longer think of you will hate the top =D
2016-10-13 10:02:58 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just a jerk
2007-10-21 02:11:23 · answer #5 · answered by Rana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am speechless for his ignorance and pitiful for you............
note from China.
2007-10-21 03:21:35 · answer #6 · answered by Warrior 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋