Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or boyfriend along shopping
This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in
Oxford:
Dear Mrs. Murray,
While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics.
Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, "Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor gas stove.
7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.
9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.
10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the "Madonna look"
using different size funnels.
12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices again."
And; last, but not least:
14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here."
Yours
sincerely,
Charles Brown
Store Manager
2007-10-21 00:47:50 · 25 answers · asked by **mum to a little miracle** 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
LMFAO!!!!
That's hilarious! I'm laughing so hard i've got stitches!
Classic male behaviour at it's worst. Have a star!!!
2007-10-21 01:00:54 · answer #1 · answered by luvnaruto 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Went to fruit and veg section, got two bananas, put one in each pocket and occasionally pulled them out and pretented they were guns, then fell to floor as if been shot.
Bought popcorn and a drink and dvd and sat down to watch the film in the electrical department
2007-10-21 08:23:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lmao..oh that's great but i have a hunch some guys might well copy those ideas to get out of the dreaded shopping trip now..lol
2007-10-21 07:53:03 · answer #3 · answered by Jools 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's hilarious! I showed it to my parents and they're laughing out loud. Have a star for giving us all such a nice day. :)
2007-10-21 07:54:18 · answer #4 · answered by Nina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I`m practically crying with laughter here. Have a star!
2007-10-21 07:50:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A really great collection of antics. I had to read it twice.You made my day. Thank you very much.
2007-10-21 08:00:33 · answer #6 · answered by yogeshwargarg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very gd pmsl 10/10 x
2007-10-21 07:59:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my God! i'm still laughing so hard my bf is staring at me like a luny. Love it!
2007-10-21 07:59:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha hahahahahahaha. Brilliant. can't stop laughing
2007-10-21 07:52:56 · answer #9 · answered by Kitty Katty 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is hilarious have a star for brightening up my day.
2007-10-21 07:58:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋