If you or your fiance called off the wedding would you give the ring back or keep it? I feel it's a ring to be filled by a contract of marrige. If you don't fill it, then it needs to be returned. If you keep it, I think your a gold digger. Most court cases side with me. How do you feel?
2007-10-20 12:25:00 · 39 answers · asked by Snappy Answers 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Let's go one step further and have evryone vote on this so it's not so "one sided". You know my stance, vote to see the public's stance! Thanks for all your input on this subject!
2007-10-20 21:08:32 · update #1
It should be given back - but I suppose there might be a case where IF you were a complete jerkwad & she had spent a bunch of $$$ on the wedding already that she could not get back deposits and stuff - then I could see her keeping the ring.
2007-10-20 13:07:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
It depends on the couple. Some men don't want the ring back. It also depends on the state you're in. Most states do agree that a ring is a symbol of a contract made between the two of you and therefore should be returned if the engagement is called off. However, there are also several cases on the books where the judge found that the ring was a gift and therefore not a requirement to be returned.
Personally, my wedding ring and engagement ring ended up on the bottom of the San Diego Bay when I got divorced. He didn't want them and I sure as heck didn't!
2007-10-20 13:57:46 · answer #2 · answered by cgspitfire 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If I willfully broke the engagement with my fiance the proper decent thing to do would be to return the ring. A know a guy whos parents broke him and his fiance up and the parents made the girl give back the ring. I dont know the whole story but the point is she was decent enough to return the ring.
I know a person who got happily married and 2 years later got bitterly divorced she had to sell the ring to provide clothes for her child.
Some woman are gold diggers I for one am not I am married 14 years and I got a small ring which I think is the most beatuiful peace of jewlery I own. e4g
2007-10-20 15:07:03 · answer #3 · answered by encourager4God 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It depends. If he cheated or he was the one to call it off, then I am damned if I would be giving it back. I probably wouldnt want to keep it either so in my bitterness I would pawn it and then go out and spend the money on something extravagant to make me feel better. If I was the one to break of the engagement then I would most definitley give it back.
If after being married tho, we divorced....then i would keep the rings for any children we have together. Or pawn them to help me get on my feet until things got better (which is actually what I did, had to do, since he kept the house and i was out, running to get away from the abusive animal, but hey, thats a whole nother story.)
Having said all of this tho, I often wonder why so many men want the ring back so badly. Is it a case of wanting to save money by giving it to the next girlfriend? Tacky, very tacky.The ring is only worth a fraction of the cost after leaving the store, so they will never get their money back.
Or do they just not want the woman to have it out of spite.
My ex husband stole my rings off me, but I stole them right back. He just didnt want me to have them out of spite. I needed them because I needed the money.
2007-10-21 10:15:19 · answer #4 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the engagement is broken - no matter who breaks it off - the ring MUST be returned to the man. It is not a gift in the regular sense, but rather was a symbol of the promise to be married. Since there will be no wedding, the ring must be returned.
As a woman, I can't fathom 'wanting' to keep a ring in this case, anyway.
2007-10-21 01:01:13 · answer #5 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is definately not something that is easily decided. I would first ask why do you want to keep it if your not getting married? He gave it to you a a symbol of love and if the love is no longer there then the ring shouldn't be either. I would also ask who broke it off. In general, if the guy breaks it off the woman is then in a place where she has to decide to either give it back or keep it. I would hope that there aren't legal issues involved since the two of you were planning on being married but if there are then it will probably need to be given back. I wish the best to you both in this hard and uncomfortable stage in your lives.
2007-10-20 12:56:01 · answer #6 · answered by Jane T 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Actually... most courts WILL NOT side with you, as the ring is considered a gift in most of the 50 states.
BUT... as to me personally, it depended on how the relationship ended.
if we decided that it just wasn't meant to be, or i was the one who decided to call off the relationship for whatever reason, Yes... i would give the ring back. It is a token of our relationship which is now over, either ended on mutual terms or on mine. I wouldnt want to keep it
BUT... if you cheated on me, or wrecked my heart something fierce... I"M KEEPING IT. I'm turning into an earring or a pendent or SOMETHING. You screwed with my emotions, you gave me baggage, you messed me up for any man who might come after you... think of this as paying forward. Since you cant pay for my therapy... i'll at least look fabulous while i'm sitting there!!
2007-10-21 04:53:50 · answer #7 · answered by loki_only1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ONLY times a girl should keep the ring is if:
1. The man says she can keep it.
2. He cheated/abused her.
3. They are married and are now divorcing.
ANY other time, she MUST give it back.
A ring is a promise to be married. If that promise is broken, it is given back to whoever bought it.
2007-10-21 02:28:20 · answer #8 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he broke it off....I'm keeping it unless it's something that has been in his family for generations. If I break it off....he can have it back.
The courts will not always side with you. It depends on the circumstances. For instance if the ring was a Christmas gift/engagement ring the courts will not make her give it back since it was a gift unto itself. If she paid for part of the ring or already put down deposits on the wedding she doesn't have to give it back.
If you called it off because she was cheating she doesn't care about you and more than likely is going to take everything she can get and keep it anyway.
2007-10-20 12:54:10 · answer #9 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Hi. I agree with YOU. I, personally, would give it back. It really doesn't matter about a "contract" as you say. For whatever reason YOUR wedding is off...it's off. I can't imagine a girl even wanting to keep the ring. But, obviously, some do. Again, I would give it back.
2007-10-20 14:57:48 · answer #10 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋