im so mad at my parents...grrrr?

Question

so my whole volleyball team is having a sleepover over one of the teammates house...but of coarse every1 wen t but me...my parents said that they have to no her parents really well 4 me to....no i feel really bad cause im missing out on all the fun... and evey1 else got to go...y wont they let me.??

so u no im 15 almost 16 never been 2 a sleepover in my life
theres 10 girls going so my chances of getting raped r like 0 geez...these r my friends i no them and we r like bf's

by the way...i paretns no theres no drinking or anything involed....i would never do that and they trust me...but how do i get to 2 lighten up...they trust me....but i never get to do anything seriously...

Answer 1

Sweetheart, Look, you mom and dad are just looking out for you. Let me tell you a little story that might give you an insight as to why they are so protective. I live in Florida, there was a few years ago a family that had a few kids over to their hous. It was a sleep over for their daughter and her friends. Everything went ok, in the morning one of the girls was gone. Someone slit the screen to the room window and came in, took the girl and let just say that the girl suffered before they found her body. They later found out that it was a guy that lived down the street that saw the girls all going into the house. Now I know that the odds of that happening are slime to none, however in this day and age you have to know everyone, and your surrounding before taking a step in any direction. Your parents only have one you, they want to know where, when, who and what about all your friends and their folk. You should be proud to have parents that care about you as much as they do, some kids dont and end up hurt, lost or dead. One other thing, your young and there is going to be a ton of other times that you will be invited to sleep over or go out and I promise they will lighten up when the time is right. I do have a suggestion, invite your girl friend and folks to a gathering. The more you incorrperate them in you life with your folks, the odds will get better for you to do things outside the house. P.S. I f i were you, I would go tell you parents how much you love them for looking out for you. Your showing understanding will show them how mature you are becoming. Good Luck!

Answer 2

Some parents are the overprotective types. Is there any way that you can have the parents of the girl who's having the sleepover meet your parents or speak with them on the phone? Is there a way that the parents of another teammate, who your parents already know and trust, can speak with your parents and reassure them that the parents where the sleepover is at are trustworthy? Could you talk to a relative who your parents might listen to and ask them to speak to your parents on your behalf?

If none of these things is possible, then please tell your parents that THIS 46 year old parent of 2 kids, ages 9 and 18, thinks that as long as they establish ground rules, such as what time you come home, making sure no illegal substances are at the sleepover, there is adequate adult supervision and that you have the freedom to call your parents if things go bad at the sleepover, then they should allow you to go. They are hindering your social growth with your peers and teammates by doing this and making you feel left out and embarrassed. This will be something you will remember as an adult and possibly resent them for later on. They should try to remember what it was like when they were kids and they should realize that they can't hold your hand through life. Sooner or later, you are going to be on your own and they are hindering your ability to learn to stand on your own two feet by being so overprotective. If the whole team is going to be there, they should allow you to go. If they trust you enough to be on the team to begin with, then they should trust you to be at a sleepover with your teammates.

I wish you all the best. I hope you are able to go to this sleepover.

Answer 3

Lighten up on your parents. If they could read what I'm saying, I'd tell them they were AWESOME, because they are doing the right thing.

It's on you to get your parents to meet any of your friends and their parents. Check out what happend to the 15 y.o girl in Wisconsin, who was over at a friends house the night a guy decided to shoot everyone in the house. Yeah it's an extreme example, but parents of todays generation..35-55 were the dope smokers and partiers 20 years ago. Guess what, some of them still do those things. Your parents have a right to know who you are with and where you are at all times.

Sounds like you have good folks. believe me that's hard to find.

My daughters 18 and 15 are the odd girls out amongst all of their friends because my wife and I haven't been divorced. Some of my younger daughters friends have parents who don't care where they are, and the tell my daughter how much it bothers them, when they see how we interact with each other.

I know you don't want to hear this, but you'll thank them from first hand knowledge some day..as for now, thank them because you love them and even though you don't understand them, they deserve it.

Answer 4

Parents can never be careful enough nowadays. I understand your anger. It stinks that you don't get to go, but your parents are doing what they feel is right and what makes them comfortable.

In general it just isn't smart to let your child go to someones house that you know nothing about. You should be proud that your parents care about you that much. Even though it doesn't make it any easier to deal with you need to understand that they are trying to protect you. They will continue to do so for the rest of your life or for as long as they can.

There will be other sleep overs at other times. Why don't you try asking your parents if you can have a little sleep over since you couldn't go to this one. Have some of the girls from the team come over to your house. Compromise. Try to meet your parents half way on this one.

Answer 5

It must feel bad being the only 1 to miss out, and it might not be much consolation, but it sounds as if your parents are bein' protective of you, 'cos they love you and don't want you to be anywhere they don't know to be safe. It's a hard call as a parent aswel 'cos they'll want you to be happy, but they want you to be safe more!
My youngest wanted to stay at a friend's house at a sleepover and I reluctantly agreed, although I had my reservations. The next morning, very early she came back home with three of her friends in tow. The Mother had got very drunk and been in and out of the bedroom scaring them all to death, until they managed to escape when she fell into a drunken stupor! My youngest said she wished I had stuck to saying no, she realised why I'd been worried, although it was worse than anything I'd imagined!
Just try and understand that your parents love you and although it feels like they don't, they obviously do, or they wouldn't care about what happens to you!

Answer 6

Why not offer to introduces the parents? Once yours meet theirs they may become more relaxed and have a better feel for what activities will and will not be permitted and will be acceptable behavior for your teammates. They probably want to know what leverl of supervision there will be eat the sleepover. Will boys be allowed over? Will the parents be at home the entire evening? Those type of questions.

Answer 7

I would want to know the parents too. It doesn't seem sensible that any good mother or father would allow their child to stay at a stranger's house.

I'm a teenager and I know how these things tend to work out. ...Drugs, lack of sleep..drinking.

It happens. If I were a parent, I'm sure I'd go to any length to prevent such acts.

The fact that they wouldn't allow you to go is perfectly reasonable and understandable.

Perhaps, if all you are doing now is whining to strangers over the internet, perhaps you aren't ready to be staying with friends anyway. You need to show respectable behavior before you can expect your parents to respect YOU.

-

Edit:
Do give your mother a kiss. If she has to put up with a brat like you, lord only knows she deserves one. After all, who pays the internet bill? Your parents, I'm guessing.

Grow up!

Answer 8

I understand your frustration!!! My husband has always been very strict about sleepovers and our kids were very disappointed at times. Would your parents allow you to have the team to your house for a sleep over? Maybe them getting to know the crew would help their comfort level. We always had kids sleep over at our house so we could get to know our kids friends better. Would they let you go for the evening and pick you up at midnight/1am? We tried that too.

I can't speak for your parents but here is our reason....I was molested as a kid...it takes one time for your whole life to be permanatley scarred...what's that you say? My friends/parents would never?! My molester was my Dad and he went after one of my friends......You just never know.
Keep trying with them and (your parents) if they can see and hear a mature appeal without immature temper tantrums, who knows? maybe they'll let out some slack.
Take care!!

Answer 9

Well your parents are old fashion and that want nothing to happen to you. Sometimes parents think it's still teh times like when they were younger and parents were real strict. But maybe as long as you keep their trust pretty soon you might be able to dso stuff that you can't right now. So ahve patience my grasshopper and one day you will go on a sleep over.

Answer 10

I can understand your problem, and your parents may be being to overprotective, but their concern is you and your welfare, and absolutly yes they should know the parents that will be in charge,
There are a lot of bad people out there and you don't always know who they are.
Understand they are not doing it to spite you, its because they love you, sometimes its tough. maybe you could suggest a sleep over at your place next time, try and get your parents involved with the other parents.